If your husband offers.....

Worknprogress

Worknprogress

Cathlete
for you to get away all by yourself, would you?

I have 2 boys, ages 4 and 5 that are very attached to me since I am a SAHM and dad works long hours during the week.

Life hasn't been the easiest for awhile and we were going to get away together for our anniversary but I would benefit far more if I just could get away by myself and not be accountable to anyone. So he is offering I do that but I am feeling so guilty.

I know that most of us would say, "Definitely do it" but could you REALLY? Most women don't because we feel guilty to take real time off for ourselves and I am one of them so I don't know if I could really pull the trigger and go.

Thoughts?
 
I've gone for half spa days and that type of thing, but I can't imagine going away for more than a day - I think the guilt would kill me! And I'd be calling home all the time.

Stebby
 
Debbie, I feel your pain!!! I am very rarely without one of our 3 daughters, ages 7, 5, and 1. My sister and I signed up for the Warrior Dash, an out-of-state race, in June. I was trying to figure out HOW to plan for me, DH, our 3 DDs and my sister to get there, sleep, get back.... DH suggested I go alone w/ my sister. I was like "For REAL!?!?! But I never do anything alone!" Now I am so giddy for this trip it is unreal! We're going to leave early on a Friday AM, shop in Chicago all day, and we have a hotel room booked for Friday night. We'll do our race Saturday AM, get all nice and muddy:D, and drive back to be home in time to tuck DDs into bed Saturday! A quick getaway but perfect for me!

Go ahead & do it! Enjoy yourself! Where are you headed?!
 
Do it!! There is an unwritten rule in my house. A happy mom makes for a happy household. You'll feel rested, refreshed, and ready to resume all the motherly duties that will follow us for the rest of our lives here on earth.
By the way, . . I also do spa days 1 time every other month. When I start to get grumpy even my kids will say "Dad I think mom needs another spa day!"
 
The Cathe Roadtrips have been my me time. 3-4 fabulous days of it. And it makes for a very happy Mom, wife, employee, etc. You really should do it. :)
 
We have two kids. We already do this. I have no guilt in doing this. We did before kids and have continued doing this while raising our children.

Each one us does our own special thing separately, since we don't always have the same interests. He loves to mountian bike and ski, so he plans trips like this to do. I like fitness, warm weather, visit friends and love to shop by myself. This works for us. We balance this with family vacations, too.

"Just do it," especially if your husband is capable of taking care of the kids and their needs.
 
I regularly go away for Girl's weekends, and have since the kids were younger than yours (for perspective, I'd have to bring my breast pump along on those early trips!). Guilt? No way. Not even a glimmer. The kids will be FINE, and, well, it's just not healthy to feel strapped to the house like that.
 
Get over it and go!!!! Wild animals leave their young completely unattended while they go in search of food. You're leaving yours with a perfectly capable human father. The only person putting guilt on you is you. That's a choice your making. Choose to take care of yourself for a change and go!!
 
I'm a sahm to 3 girls-10, 7, and 3. I haven't been on a girls only/couples only getaway in a few years, but I have gone on many girls nights out and I frequently send the girls to my parents' house for the weekend. I do this without an ounce of guilt cause, "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!"

So I say go and have a wonderful time-relax, renew your spirit and you will come back better for it:)
 
Oh My Gosh......Worknprogress.....YES....with a capital "Y"

Go and de-stress and DO NOT feel one bit guilt. Your husband is a GOOD MAN to suggest such a thing.....sad to say....but, many men out there would never offer to do this for their wifes....My sister-in-law is married to one of them! :rolleyes: Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy.....he would just be lost taking care of his own kids.........I have had to kidnap her a few times.....needless to say, he's not a happy man!:p
 
My husband and I spend one weekend apart each year. My girl friends from college and I meet at a different place every year. Last year we went to Las Vegas and had a blast!!!!!!! DH went to Manitoba Canada with his friends.

I truly believe this along with many other aspects of our relationship keeps our marriage fresh and strong.
 
Are you kidding? I spend lots of time away from my DH. Of course our son is grown, so that isn't a factor, but I love traveling to spend time with friends and family that live far away.

I can't even imagine not getting away from each other every once in a while. I would say I leave to go somewhere about 6 or 7 times a year! It works well for us! :D
 
DO IT. Leave the guilt in the toilet, and give it a double flush. I've left several times for mountainbike trips over the years and come back happier and my husband is slightly...ever so slightly... more appreciative (also was a SAHM).

There are lots of women-only vacations out there (google women only vacations) and you may see something you like.
 
I visited my dearest friend last year when she had her baby. I loved spending ordinary time with her (taking the kids to school, running errands, etc.) and ended up taking care of her 2 young sons so she could tend to the baby. They kind of filled in since I missed my own kids, but it was fun! It also made me appreciate my own home life a lot when I came home.
 
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Worknprogress said:
for you to get away all by yourself, would you?

I have 2 boys, ages 4 and 5 that are very attached to me since I am a SAHM and dad works long hours during the week.

Life hasn't been the easiest for awhile and we were going to get away together for our anniversary but I would benefit far more if I just could get away by myself and not be accountable to anyone. So he is offering I do that but I am feeling so guilty.

I know that most of us would say, "Definitely do it" but could you REALLY? Most women don't because we feel guilty to take real time off for ourselves and I am one of them so I don't know if I could really pull the trigger and go.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...

Could you split the time up? A few days alone and then you can be recharged to have a romantic few days away w/ dh. - Autumn
 
Definitely. Dads do this stuff all the time and never feel guilty about it, why is it any different for moms?
 
I would go in a heartbeat, but then again, I don't have children so I wouldn't have the guilt factor to deal with. I think that makes a huge difference!

Make it a short trip - 2 to 3 days. My brother and his wife each got one week a year to go away and restore themselves. I think it's why they've stayed married all these years!
 
Do it Debbie.

Do it without guilt. You cannot love and care for others without loving and caring for yourself.

You truly deserve some time to yourself.

Kids can cope with something like this. The initial reaction will come from fear of missing you. When it actually happens (your being away) , sure they will miss you but not anywhere near their initial reaction. They will have their regular schedule to keep them occupied for a lot of the time. It will be an oppotunity for your husband too to create some special memories with them.
 
Okay ladies. My husband made the reservations last night. I am leaving today at about 3:30 and heading down to the Delaware shore. I have an ocean front room - I don't care that it's winter - I just love the sound of the ocean and the peace of the tide at night.

It's a very nice hotel with a jacuzzi in the room and I have books, candles, Ipod, etc., all ready to go.

I am starting to get excited. Still feeling guilty but I have got to find a way to let that go.

Thanks for the encouragement. If I had not gotten an overwhelming yes, I wouldn't be going.
 
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