Reasonable Expectations, Realistic Results

eminenz2

Cathlete
I know I've posted a number of threads regarding our (my) aging bodies. I think there are many of us here who are either coming up to our 40s, in our 40s and 50s, and are experiencing these changes in our bodies.

I have been doing my 30-day XTrain rotation (yes, even though I've been grumbling about it, I have remained faithful! Mostly.) and I just got to thinking about really, besides getting healthy, what changes can I realistically expect in my body shape, appearance, etc.

There is nothing about my body that is 'ideal' regarding body shape (RE: society's standards, fitness stantards, etc.). Head-to-toe, I could name everything that is 'wrong' about my body's appearance and shape.

So here I am doing this rotation. I was just doing "Legs" last night and Cathe mentions during the firewalkers "Your bum is going to look soooo good." Yay, I need Cathe cheering me on, but really? I don't believe it. I'm 45. I have a huge ass. It jigges, it wiggles and I don't think that loose skin and cellulite is going anywhere. And if I were lucky enough to lose the weight, I know the skin would just hang. It's done it before.

So I'm covered in this loose layer of skin and body fat. Just really, how much can it tighten up? Because I know how the women in my family are shaped. For example, I know my calves will always be as thick as Italian salamis no matter how much weight I lose. Legs? Very heavy even though I can distinctly feel the muscles inside. (All that riding has to account for something! ;) ) I also reallize age is changing my body.

Surely, we all know it's about getting fit, but how much can you fight your genetics? I will always be thick and pudgy. I always have. Nothing about me will ever be tiny.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!
 
Your post gave me a chuckle and I agree. I recently turned 42 and am have been noticing these lovely changes in the past year. Pounds are harder to get off and require more effort, injuries or "tweaks" more often and take longer to rebound from. I will say I still see positive changes due to running and bicycling IMO.
I was reading an article in a magazine at the Dr's office yesterday that stated when we get into our 40's we burn 100 less calories a day...:confused: great.

I don't think I really have any input, more like understanding and I can relate to that. Thanks to Cathe I will fight it as long as I can and I know I am better off than if I were doing nothing!! ;)
 
I was laughing all the while reading your post. I also posted something about aging and body changes. I am feeling the same way. I will 39 in 3 months. New aches and pains longer time to recover from workouts.
I was following the 90 day rotation and have twice had to deal with having an "ache" since I started 3 weeks ago. I think I'm going to incorporate yoga twice a week. I also think I'm just going to change my whole routine. Weights twice cardio twice & yoga twice.
I don't have any weight to loose just trying to be healthy and look nice in my clothes. I'm just trying to be the best version of myself. I know my body is less than perfect especially after having 3 kids! I wish I had better looking legs I have my genes to thank for that.

To me, the bottom line is that we try our best and try not to get caught up too much trying to look a certain way. Good Luck!
 
Go back and read LSass's post about how she has TOTALLY reshaped her body, and she's in the "advanced age" category you describe (as am I - staring down the barrel of 45 right now).

I don't buy it. Sure, doing what you've been doing for years is likely not going to get you much different in the way of changing your body shape if it hasn't worked for you yet. But giving up entirely at the thought of change without even TRYING something new? That seems defeatist. It is, of course, totally and completely FINE if you don't want to work differently, or possibly much harder. You certainly don't have to. But that doesn't mean you couldn't make dramatic changes if you wanted to, badly enough. It's a choice.
 
Mspina where is that post i was looking and dont see it. That might be encouaging!
I do find myself wondering if i have a chance.to look nice again. Lol
 
I'm 52 and have dropped my cardio workout down to once a week, weights three days a week and yoga three days a week. I can no longer do intense cardio. My heart rate goes over my max during the warm-up and I can't get it under control to finish a workout. If I can't get rid of the menopause belly with heavy weightlifting and yoga, I'm doing lipo.
 
There are so many factors that go into how everyone looks--genetics and age are part of the picture, but I do believe we can change how we look. We can't make ourselves look like someone else, but we can take the clay we were born with and mold it into its best possible version. It is hard work the older we get, I completely agree. I just turned 42 and it is harder for me to keep weight off no matter how hard I workout (and I workout pretty hard!). But I also know I don't put the effort into my diet to achieve the kind of results fitness models get. And that is really the key. A large percentage of the results we want come from the kitchen. And for me at least, that is much harder than working out every day. I read a lot of body building literature and it isn't just the calories you consume (though that does play a part), but the quality and balance of macronutrients you consume. The women with the beautiful bodies we strive for work very hard for them. Yes, those appearing in magazines are genetically predisposition to look like that (as Cathe is), but that doesn't mean we can't also look lean and musclular with A LOT of hard work.

Ever read Tosca Reno's Clean Eating books? She started body building in her 40s and look at her now. Incredible! And in her 50s!

That's my problem, btw. I cannot seem to make myself eat the way I need to to get the aesthetic results I want. I am a good weight (not the weight I want, but I stay in the mid 130s at 66 inches--I would love to get back into the 120s), I maintain it and I have a lot of muscle. But I also have a cottage cheese butt and belly fat. Do I think if I ate right they would go away? No. I've had too many abdominal surgeries for the belly to ever be perfect and I've read enough to know that cellulite will not disappear no matter what I do. However, eating right would make them both look tons better. I already do the hard exercise.

So all of this to say that yes—I think you can fight genetics—not to make yourself look like a completely different person, but to make yourself look pretty darn good. But it takes lots of hard work both in and out of the kitchen.
 
Oh, I can completely relate too.

I'm not sure if it's just the fact that I am now in my early 40s or if it's also because I gave birth to twins at 41, but I am having the hardest time toning up my abs. I fell back to my pre-pregnancy weight fast (within 6 weeks) but have gained back 9 lbs. I am now finding there is no room for "cheating" in what I eat. My body is so unforgiving now that I'm older. What used to constitute "clean" eating when I was in my 30s just doesn't work anymore. I'm only realizing now that "clean" eating for me is even more strict than before.

I've never been happy with my lower body even though others have told me I look great (typical, right?). But I'm going to keep working at it. I try to switch up my workout routines so my body doesn't get used to it. As long as I've got the stamina to do Cathe's workouts, I will!

Maybe try working with a personal trainer at least for a one-off consultation to help devise a workout strategy that works for your body type?
 
I know I've posted a number of threads regarding our (my) aging bodies. I think there are many of us here who are either coming up to our 40s, in our 40s and 50s, and are experiencing these changes in our bodies.

I have been doing my 30-day XTrain rotation (yes, even though I've been grumbling about it, I have remained faithful! Mostly.) and I just got to thinking about really, besides getting healthy, what changes can I realistically expect in my body shape, appearance, etc.

There is nothing about my body that is 'ideal' regarding body shape (RE: society's standards, fitness stantards, etc.). Head-to-toe, I could name everything that is 'wrong' about my body's appearance and shape.

So here I am doing this rotation. I was just doing "Legs" last night and Cathe mentions during the firewalkers "Your bum is going to look soooo good." Yay, I need Cathe cheering me on, but really? I don't believe it. I'm 45. I have a huge ass. It jigges, it wiggles and I don't think that loose skin and cellulite is going anywhere. And if I were lucky enough to lose the weight, I know the skin would just hang. It's done it before.

So I'm covered in this loose layer of skin and body fat. Just really, how much can it tighten up? Because I know how the women in my family are shaped. For example, I know my calves will always be as thick as Italian salamis no matter how much weight I lose. Legs? Very heavy even though I can distinctly feel the muscles inside. (All that riding has to account for something! ;) ) I also reallize age is changing my body.

Surely, we all know it's about getting fit, but how much can you fight your genetics? I will always be thick and pudgy. I always have. Nothing about me will ever be tiny.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!

I'm not exactly in the same category as you; I'm 30. I'm also an hourglass but after having my baby, I know my waistline will be thicker now and that's just how it's going to be. I always heard about the "mommy tummy" effect and never believed it because my skin always snaps back regardless of how much weight gain and lose I have had over the years. But I'll be damned if I don't have this lower pooch the hangs at my stomach/hips area; an area that had never had that issue before.

I think some things are genetics, some things are luck, and some things depend greatly on how your body has looked and acted all of your life. It's IMO and research is starting to back my opinion up, but if you've always been "overweight" or a double digit size, the likelihood that you'll get the abs and a$$ of glory past age 35 and certainly age 40 are slim. Can it be done? Yes. But regardless of age and size the FACT is: only 3-5% of the population will suceed at weight loss AND KEEP IT OFF! It's one thing to gain baby weight and say you've lost it. It's another thing to have always, ALWAYS carried around 15-100 extra pounds and lose/keep those off. It's hard, again, the research shows this (it was even tested back on WW2 Vets and active duty soliders in the 40s).

Another thing is that our society says we need to look a certain way. Many people, fat and thin alike, will espouse that thinking and live their lives accordingly including judging others. This includes statements like "I did it, so can you". Um, no, it doesn't work like that; even Cathe post posted a recent blog about it. In my life, I have been everything from a sunken-in, hair-falling out, pasty Size 3 and a full-figured, ample curved Size 22. Until I yo-yoed my body into a larger frame, I always fell naturally into a Size 10 AE Brand Jeans; 8s in the warmer months. Fast-forward a little over 13 years and I know I could never see a Size 10 again without drastic measures and EDs again. Not only that, but again, I have a 3-5% chance of keeping it off. So really, what's the point?

I focus on how I feel, not how I look. The result? I feel better about how I look and I treat myself better, giving me better health and less stress. I exercise more regularly and I enjoy more moderate and sometimes vigorous forms of exercise because of it. When I feel good about myself and forget about what others think I should do and look like (really- their opinions matter because???) I take my life into my hands and I live it to the fullest. I enjoy who I am and what I can do and it unconsciously makes me do more and try harder things when the moment and evergy strikes me. I have a big butt. But as Gin Miller says "Have a great big butt". I will never look like Cathe and it's not reasonable for me to do every rotation she comes up with thinking that I can and could. Nadda happening. For some sure... 3-5% will. But I fall into that 95% and have for years regardless of how hard I tried and how miserable I was trying.... That is just the fact.

Be good with where you're at. If your butt get's smaller- Yay! If not, that's fine too!

FYI- Tosca Reno is an extreme case. And to be honest according to the guidelines of the National Eating Disorder Association, she's a disordered eater. She has so many "rules" about food and partakes in extreme food-labeling. She's not the only one. But it is because of people like her that "clean" eating has become something of moral virture. "clean" foods used to mean something else and in fact we didn't use those terms; we ate like our grandparents and that was what natural eating was all about; including moderation. But thanks to Tosca and others like her, it's a moral undetaking to give up certain foods in order to look a certain way. You are given kudos for doing so and are a "good, moral" person fighting the fatty-world. Really... when you die the people that matter most will never care about the size you were or weren't. Your children will never care how much weight you could lift or how many minutes you exercised. When they grow up they will remember how often or how little you played with them and the food-phobias you had both at home and in public. Just some stirring "food for thought".
 
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I focus on how I feel, not how I look. The result? I feel better about how I look and I treat myself better, giving me better health and less stress. I exercise more regularly and I enjoy more moderate and sometimes vigorous forms of exercise because of it. When I feel good about myself and forget about what others think I should do and look like (really- their opinions matter because???) I take my life into my hands and I live it to the fullest. I enjoy who I am and what I can do and it unconsciously makes me do more and try harder things when the moment and evergy strikes me. I have a big butt. But as Gin Miller says "Have a great big butt". I will never look like Cathe and it's not reasonable for me to do every rotation she comes up with thinking that I can and could. Nadda happening. For some sure... 3-5% will. But I fall into that 95% and have for years regardless of how hard I tried and how miserable I was trying.... That is just the fact.

Be good with where you're at. If your butt get's smaller- Yay! If not, that's fine too!

Yes, yes, yes to all of this! I still have my moments of "OMG, my butt is huge", but overall I've managed to focus on how working out makes me feel and now how it makes me look, and it has made a huge difference in my outlook.
 
FYI- Tosca Reno is an extreme case. And to be honest according to the guidelines of the National Eating Disorder Association, she's a disordered eater. She has so many "rules" about food and partakes in extreme food-labeling. She's not the only one. But it is because of people like her that "clean" eating has become something of moral virture. "clean" foods used to mean something else and in fact we didn't use those terms; we ate like our grandparents and that was what natural eating was all about; including moderation. But thanks to Tosca and others like her, it's a moral undetaking to give up certain foods in order to look a certain way. You are given kudos for doing so and are a "good, moral" person fighting the fatty-world. Really... when you die the people that matter most will never care about the size you were or weren't. Your children will never care how much weight you could lift or how many minutes you exercised. When they grow up they will remember how often or how little you played with them and the food-phobias you had both at home and in public. Just some stirring "food for thought".

I wasn't advocating to live the Tosca Reno lifestyle. I was responding to the question--is it possible? Yes, it is, I think. I cannot live that way because it is very difficult to live that kind of strict lifestyle. So clearly I will never achieve the "ideal." However, the "ideal" is what we see in movies and magazines. The reason such a small percentage of the population fit in that category is because it is part genetics and part very hard work--work that the majority of the population doesn't have the time, the money or the motivation to do. But it is possible to mold your body into the best it can be. You don't have to look like a fitness model to look awesome--however if that is what you are striving for, I do think it is possible.

I am not advocating it because I do not do it--I was just giving my opinion. I love to eat, so I stay in the 130s. But I also have to put in some effort in the gym and the kitchen not to gain weight. If I put in more effort in the kitchen, I could lose the 10 pounds I dislike, but it's not worth it to me. My husband loves the way I look and loves to eat, too. So I keep us both happy by not pursuing some ideal aesthetic.
 
I wasn't advocating to live the Tosca Reno lifestyle. I was responding to the question--is it possible? Yes, it is, I think. I cannot live that way because it is very difficult to live that kind of strict lifestyle. So clearly I will never achieve the "ideal." However, the "ideal" is what we see in movies and magazines. The reason such a small percentage of the population fit in that category is because it is part genetics and part very hard work--work that the majority of the population doesn't have the time, the money or the motivation to do. But it is possible to mold your body into the best it can be. You don't have to look like a fitness model to look awesome--however if that is what you are striving for, I do think it is possible.

I am not advocating it because I do not do it--I was just giving my opinion. I love to eat, so I stay in the 130s. But I also have to put in some effort in the gym and the kitchen not to gain weight. If I put in more effort in the kitchen, I could lose the 10 pounds I dislike, but it's not worth it to me. My husband loves the way I look and loves to eat, too. So I keep us both happy by not pursuing some ideal aesthetic.

I repectfully disagree. It (the maintaining of loss of more than a total of 10% over your starting weight) has nothing to do with "time and effort". The losing of weight itself does take time and effort, thee "keeping it off" a crap shoot regardless of time and effort spent at the gym. Hell, many of us have tried to the point of illness and injury and the pounds still creep back. The stats to lose and keep off only 10% has something like an 80% fail rate too. So more are successful at this over the long term, but still that's only 20 people out of 100. This again, has been studied for almost 70 yrs- long before "time and effort" was ever an issue. It has mostly to do with a biological response, leptin, cortisol, adrenal glands, the hypothalamus, and feast-or-famine triggered response the body (hormonally) is plunged into. Saying it's "time, money, and effort" is opinion, not factual.
 
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FYI- Tosca Reno is an extreme case. And to be honest according to the guidelines of the National Eating Disorder Association, she's a disordered eater. She has so many "rules" about food and partakes in extreme food-labeling. She's not the only one. But it is because of people like her that "clean" eating has become something of moral virture. "clean" foods used to mean something else and in fact we didn't use those terms; we ate like our grandparents and that was what natural eating was all about; including moderation. But thanks to Tosca and others like her, it's a moral undetaking to give up certain foods in order to look a certain way. You are given kudos for doing so and are a "good, moral" person fighting the fatty-world. Really... when you die the people that matter most will never care about the size you were or weren't. Your children will never care how much weight you could lift or how many minutes you exercised. When they grow up they will remember how often or how little you played with them and the food-phobias you had both at home and in public. Just some stirring "food for thought".


I'll tell you my point of view as an adult child... I had to manage my mother's prescription drugs because there were so many she couldn't remember how to take them.The cost of drugs she needed to maintain some form of life left her broke, which was completely depressing to her. Her pension did not cover the cost AFTER insurance paid so she had to charge her monthly meds. Ninety percent of my mother's health problems were directly related to poor nutrition (high cholesterol, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, joint problems from excessive weight). I was haunted by the memories of my mother's last few years on this earth. It took me several years to let go of those memories.

I don't think choosing whole foods as a moral virtue. For me it's all about quality of life. I feel like crap when I eat processed food. For me, there is no such a thing as moderation when today's processed foods are laced with ingredients that stimulate appetite and promote food addiction. I eat it, I can't stop.
I don't think we can eat like our grandparents, because the food today looks nothing like the food from yesterday. The grocery store shelves are lined with junk that barely resembles any form of natural food.
 
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This is a depressing thread. Sounds like many have just "given up". I think that's awful. I always think you can do better. Whenever I work out I try to do it harder, faster, or heavier than the last time. I'm not saying I have a perfect body because I don't. But I've learned to like what I have, and if there's sometime I really want I work my tail off to get it. I think many people claim to "really want" something but just aren't dedicated enough to put in the work required. Yes, it takes A LOT of work but if your willing to really dedicate yourself to the things you want (and I mean really want) I think you can achieve them. And this doesn't apply to just fitness/body either.
Just my two cents.
 
I personally am not going to get old and frumpy with out a fight!! I'm going to be 41 this year. At 39 I looked in the mirror at the spare tire I had developed and thought to myself, I'm not going out like this. I WILL be sexy at 40 and beyond!! It was then that I committed to working out and making changes to my diet. I've never been as good at diet changes as I am at working out. The workout is easy for me. Diet...not so much. It just seems to take a lot of effort to figure out what to eat. I do much better at portion control, but not so hot at the content of what I eat. However, I was able to loose 18 lbs and get back into a range that I consider sexy. I've been as low as 135(I'm 5'8"), which I find too small and hard to maintain. I'm currently 142, which is very easily maintained and my husband LOVES IT. I'd rather be 138, but I'm not in the mood for the diet adjustments so I'm not going to bother right now.

I don't think we have to resign ourselves to giggly bottoms and excessive cellulite. Will I ever have ALL the cellulite off my legs or butt, nope. But I can get it to a point that I find expectable and where I'm comfortable wearing shorts outside in the summer.

In terms of the workouts that I'm able to do at 41 and the new aches and pains that come with age....I find that I have to reset my expectations for myself. I can't do 6 days of super intense workouts anymore. When I do I feel run down. If I want to workout 6 days I week, I need to build in active rest. I don't see any point in workouts if they are going to make you feel worse and not better. We all have to find that workout routine for ourselves that is helpful and not harmful. For me it's no more than 1 high impact workout a week and sometimes I need to do an entire month of low impact for a rest. But that doesn't mean I have to STOP working out. I just workout within my ability. I'm only ever upset with myself over my performance when I give up. As long as I've given it an honest attempt and done my best that's good enough for me :)
 
Fit44 wow dont i know what u mean!
My real mom was a beaitiful lady but made bad choices as a young one that created bad habits. All of it caused pain and her body eating away at itself and i still cant let go p
Of her moans, her depression of knowing i was taking on her all by myself, i wouldnt have changed the fact it was me. but yes her pain and the rattle in her lungs is an image and a sound i cant get rid of those memories.
But she wanted me to be healthy and so did i, so i dont smoke, drink, and i eat as healthy as i can. I exercise. I try to be the best me i can be, thats what matters but i still have hope i may be able to shrink my belly some .. I guess its my motto in life, i hope for the best and alot but i dont expect to much! So thats a happy medium to me.
Sorry about ur mom i totaly understand.
 
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I'll tell you my point of view as an adult child... I had to manage my mother's prescription drugs because there were so many she couldn't remember how to take them.The cost of drugs she needed to maintain some form of life left her broke, which was completely depressing to her. Her pension did not cover the cost AFTER insurance paid so she had to charge her monthly meds. Ninety percent of my mother's health problems were directly related to poor nutrition (high cholesterol, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, joint problems from excessive weight). I was haunted by the memories of my mother's last few years on this earth. It took me several years to let go of those memories.

I don't think choosing whole foods as a moral virtue. For me it's all about quality of life. I feel like crap when I eat processed food. For me, there is no such a thing as moderation when today's processed foods are laced with ingredients that stimulate appetite and promote food addiction. I eat it, I can't stop.
I don't think we can eat like our grandparents, because the food today looks nothing like the food from yesterday. The grocery store shelves are lined with junk that barely resembles any form of natural food.
My mother is going through the same thing. I can't get it through her head that she needs to stop eating "out of the box." You are right about the food our grandparents ate. The so-called "fresh vegetables" they sell in the grocery store don't taste anything like they did when I was a little kid. Even the veggies I buy at the local produce stand don't taste the same.
 
This is a depressing thread. Sounds like many have just "given up". I think that's awful. I always think you can do better. Whenever I work out I try to do it harder, faster, or heavier than the last time. I'm not saying I have a perfect body because I don't. But I've learned to like what I have, and if there's sometime I really want I work my tail off to get it. I think many people claim to "really want" something but just aren't dedicated enough to put in the work required. Yes, it takes A LOT of work but if your willing to really dedicate yourself to the things you want (and I mean really want) I think you can achieve them. And this doesn't apply to just fitness/body either.
Just my two cents.

This is a pretty depressing thread. We all have built our own personal opinions based on our own personal experiences (me included). My experiences tell me that you can defy expectations with hard work. I have 12 screws and 2 plates in each heel--they were crushed by a drunk driver. They were going to amputate both of my feet after the accident but a talented surgeon saved both of my feet. However, I was told that I would never be running or jumping or living the same life I did before the accident. I was also told that it would go downhill--I would soon develop arthritis and need more surgeries. That even walking would always be painful.

Its been 4 years since the accident and I run and jump EVERY SINGLE DAY. Cathe, Insanity, P90X, TurboFire--I have done them all (and more) SINCE the accident. However, if I had believed the doctors' very educated opinion, I would have given up, lived with my "disability" and probably have developed arthritis and needed more surgery by now. BTW--I joined support groups after the accident full of people who had sustained similair injuries (most much less severe than mine) and they had given up, believed what the doctors told them and were depressed and disabled.

We believe what we believe to help us function and make ourselves happy. For me, I have to believe if you work hard and put in the effort anything is possible. There are plenty of people out there who have done triumped that I can look to for role models. For me, that is a good thing to believe.
 
Jengollf that is very inspiring! Thanks.
You r right too.. When tbey told mom what was wrong with her, it was like the day before she wasnt great but she attempted to get uo and hoped for getting better but the very day mom was told all her problems and was told she had only so long to live and that they were surprised she was still alive it was that day she came home stayd more in bed had more pain. I think if they hadnt of told her, her quaility of life would have been better. Course i guess that is different then vanity of looking good i dont know... It all ties together somewhat. I have to continue to move im too afraid not to try with what i saw her and my aunt go thru.
 

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