Reasonable Expectations, Realistic Results

I have always dabbled with working out all my life mostly with cardio very rarely any weights. Even though I bought many of cathe's weight DVD's they always ended up not used. In June 2009 I had intestinal surgey and became a couch potato. Pretty much did nothing until April of 2012. Needless to say I put on weight and was depressed. And yes I had a huge butt and stomach. When I went for my annual physical my doctor was less than pleased with my weight and lab work. At this point I decided to make a commitment to myself and get healthy, lose the weight and reshape my body. I pulled out all my weight dvd's, borrowed my friends P90x dvd's and bought a few more of cathe's (love the low instensity series). I have so many of cathe's workouts that my family calls her my personal trainer! I also ran/walked on my treadmil until I could run straight thru. I am proud to say that at age 51 I lost the weight, reshaped my figure and feel I am in better shape now than I have been in many years! It was not an easy thing to do and I really had to stay focused and constantly work on it. I get up at 4:30AM have a quick cup of coffee then working out by 5AM. Hated doing this but now it's habit and I love it. Dieting does not work for me so I completely changed my eating habits and now make healthy choices. Sure I cheat and have pigout days every now and then but I get right back to things. I have Type 2 diabetes (runs in the family) and my hormones are all over the place. Both of these things plus my age were against me. But I was having none of it. My husband and I are going to Mexico in October and I know I will be rocking a bikini! Don't give up, it can be done and I am proof.
 
ReneePruitt said:
Fit44 wow dont i know what u mean!
My real mom was a beaitiful lady but made bad choices as a young one that created bad habits. All of it caused pain and her body eating away at itself and i still cant let go p
Of her moans, her depression of knowing i was taking on her all by myself, i wouldnt have changed the fact it was me. but yes her pain and the rattle in her lungs is an image and a sound i cant get rid of those memories.
But she wanted me to be healthy and so did i, so i dont smoke, drink, and i eat as healthy as i can. I exercise. I try to be the best me i can be, thats what matters but i still have hope i may be able to shrink my belly some .. I guess its my motto in life, i hope for the best and alot but i dont expect to much! So thats a happy medium to me.
Sorry about ur mom i totaly understand.
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This is what haunts me the most. My mother survived an aneurysm and was put on a respirator. The surgeon told me that he needed to perform a tracheotomy because her upper body fat was putting too much pressure on her lungs, and that was the only way they could get her off the respirator.
It took me a long time to get past those memories.
The sad thing is...she could never enjoy her grandchildren. She spent her "golden" years managing her poor health.

Yeah, I want to look good there is a vanity element to fitness for me, but what I want the most, Is to be able to spend 5 days in Disney Land with my grandchildren(when I have them:p), keep up and maybe even be able to run circles around them.
 
Yes! Fit44 i agree so much.
My sister smokes and drinks everyday she didnt battle fat loke me but when she talks about my wanting to b healthy she makes the comment..no use to we gonna die When God wants,us to.. But i dont agree or if we have a sate set then i want like you said to be able to b with grandkids til that day. I told my sis, this.. I believe God gives us the ability to know what we can do for longivity. Thats my opinion, and if im wromg im wtong but to much evidence is shown if we eat crap or pit bad toxins in our bodies we get sick. So i for one agree plus i just love the feeling of jogging or whatever breathing hard! I feel more alive while im doing tjis then any time of my life!
 
fit44 said:
I'll tell you my point of view as an adult child... I had to manage my mother's prescription drugs because there were so many she couldn't remember how to take them.The cost of drugs she needed to maintain some form of life left her broke, which was completely depressing to her. Her pension did not cover the cost AFTER insurance paid so she had to charge her monthly meds. Ninety percent of my mother's health problems were directly related to poor nutrition (high cholesterol, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, joint problems from excessive weight). I was haunted by the memories of my mother's last few years on this earth. It took me several years to let go of those memories.

I don't think choosing whole foods as a moral virtue. For me it's all about quality of life. I feel like crap when I eat processed food. For me, there is no such a thing as moderation when today's processed foods are laced with ingredients that stimulate appetite and promote food addiction. I eat it, I can't stop.
I don't think we can eat like our grandparents, because the food today looks nothing like the food from yesterday. The grocery store shelves are lined with junk that barely resembles any form of natural food.
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For one thing, just as many "skinny people" get and do have high BP, High Cholesterol, diabetes, and joint issues. I for a fact come from a long, long line of them. From the outside, they look "healthy" according to societal standards. In reality, they are anything but. You have to stop judging the book by the cover.

The only thing you can tell about a fat person, even a thin person, by looking at them is that they are fat or thin. Nothing and I do mean nothing else. Period. (other than personal hygiene).

Secondly, Why can't you eat like your grandparents?! Are you choosing not to? I scratch cook and bake almost everything we consume. I know I eat like my great-granparents, I even use many of the same recipes that they themselves did.

Again, just something to think about.
 
momto4 said:
This is a depressing thread. Sounds like many have just "given up". I think that's awful. I always think you can do better. Whenever I work out I try to do it harder, faster, or heavier than the last time. I'm not saying I have a perfect body because I don't. But I've learned to like what I have, and if there's sometime I really want I work my tail off to get it. I think many people claim to "really want" something but just aren't dedicated enough to put in the work required. Yes, it takes A LOT of work but if your willing to really dedicate yourself to the things you want (and I mean really want) I think you can achieve them. And this doesn't apply to just fitness/body either.
Just my two cents.
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And who are you to tell someone that they've given up? What gives you the right to judge the actions and feelings of someone about how they feel about THEIR body (not your's) as giving up?! Why is that ok? Because we don't look a certain way or wish to punnish ourselves into looking a certain way. Or at the very least spend our days pointing out every single flaw with self-shaming? Why should I hate myself and how I look? I don't, I love myself and my abilities and health (speaking for myself alone here) have nothing to do with the appearance of my body.I am the expert of me. I am the owner of my underpants and if I want anyone feeling "sad" for me, you'll be the first to know. Would you tolerate someone telling you that you've given up as a parent, employee, or marriage if you took an unpopular approach to your situation? I would hope not. So please, don't do that to others when it comes to their bodies. Because believe you me, we know OUR BODIES better than anyone. What you do, is your thing. more power to you either way, but don't expect that just bc others don't feel the same way that it's because we've "given up".
 
mrsprincess07 said:
For one thing, just as many "skinny people" get and do have high BP, High Cholesterol, diabetes, and joint issues. I for a fact come from a long, long line of them. From the outside, they look "healthy" according to societal standards. In reality, they are anything but. You have to stop judging the book by the cover.

The only thing you can tell about a fat person, even a thin person, by looking at them is that they are fat or thin. Nothing and I do mean nothing else. Period. (other than personal hygiene).

Secondly, Why can't you eat like your grandparents?! Are you choosing not to? I scratch cook and bake almost everything we consume. I know I eat like my great-granparents, I even use many of the same recipes that they themselves did.

Again, just something to think about.
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I never said my mother's health problems were related to her obesity. I said it was a related to poor nutrition. The obesity was only one side effect from eating processed junk. She was addicted to sugar. She consumed a lot of calories, but her body was starving for nutrition.

Yes, you can maintain low scale weight by eating 1200 calories a day consisting of nothing but processed food, but your health will suffer in the long run.
I met a nurse who lost a lot of weight following the Jenny Craig diet. She said her blood panels came back with extremely high cholesterol from all the processed food.

As for my grandparents, they lived during the depression. They could not afford to buy processed food from the grocery store. They grew and raised their own food. They baked their own bread from whole wheat, not the GMO that you see on the shelf today. My mother talked about her "pet" chicken that ended up on the dinner table!:eek:
I guess if I lived on a farm I could eat like my grandparents. Although I have cut the head off of a chicken for my dogs and that is something I will never do again!:eek::eek:

I don't understand your comment about food choices and moral virtue?
 
I found this thread extremely interesting and enjoyed reading everyone's opinion.

I think really what it all boils down to is what each person's individual goals are. I think it's easy to feel frustrated some times when you feel like you aren't coming to close to achieving those goals. I want to say that everyone in this forum is here because we are doing something that a lot of people don't any more: exercising and trying to embrace our own version of a healthy lifestyle. To everyone that feels frustrated with where they are at in their goals, just remember how much you have accomplished since you started your fitness journey! In order to know where we are going, we also need to remember where we have been.

For me personally, I continue this journey because I want to be better tomorrow than I am today. There are days when I should have eaten better and there are days when I didn't exercise as much as I should have. But you know what? Every day is a clean slate and we can all choose what we do on it!
 
I'm 51 and I am seeing changes in my body...yes at 51 years of age! I lost 40 pounds about 13 years ago. I was the smallest I had been in my adult life. I put some of the weight back on when I had to care for my dad who had dementia and then care for my mom through cancer treatments. I made time for my workouts and eating was good but not great.

I have my mother's body which means I have big thighs and a butt. My legs are dimpled in places from cellulite. I got strict with my diet starting in late 2011 and I started dropping the weight. I'm eating healthier less processed foods and my workouts consists of running, kettlebells and weights. Every workout I do, except for running, involves some sort of weighted object. I try to do workouts that combine both cardio and weights and I use the heaviest piece of equipment I can manage. The results of my efforts have been smaller thighs and less dimpling. I am building muscles too. I don't expect to get rid of the dimpling completely but it is less noticeable now. I don't look like Cathe. I look like Jane but a better Jane.

Once I started dropping the weight, my racing times got better. Last year I set PRs in the 5K, 15K and half marathon distances. I'm faster than I was in my 40's. I'm no speed demon but I'm a better Jane.

My goal is not to look like Cathe or some model in a magazine. My goal is to be the best Jane that I can be. I want to be out running races when I'm 70, 80 and 90. There are lots of those folks out there and I want to be one of them. Being fit and healthy are my goals. I don't compare myself to anyone but me. If you do that you will always come up short. Ultimately the choice is up to you. I believe anything is possible.
 
fit44 said:
I don't understand your comment about food choices and moral virtue?
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A lot of people on the Cathe Forum as well as elswhere in the web-o-sphere talk about "clean eating". They "eat clean", the don't eat sugar, they workout extra hard and only fuel themselves with "proper" nutrition. Look at any weight loss thread and you'll see what I'm talking about. There are those that do talk about how eating a certain way was something they evolved with overtime as they got to know their bodies. But mostly you see throwing the Tosca Reno-style of clean eating and other nutrition rules around as if it makes them morally superior. That if you don't eat "cleanly" you can't lose weight, you can't lose the jiggle, the blah blah blah. They take on this attitude that it's "better" for you, your body, your health. It's a high and mighty persona that goes with turning their nose up at something the deem inferior. To live for the day when you can eat a cheat meal all in the hopes of getting or maintaining a few pounds lost. That living off green smoothies or some other form of "proper" nutrition will lead to advanced age and a tiny waistline. That by not going out to eat or by being a total pain-in-the-butt, high-maintenance eater, that they have some how elevated themselves above all else.

Perhaps it's just because I too was once one of those pain-in-the-butt, high maintenance eaters. Because I counter my calories and I avoided all things "bad" and opted only for the purest of "good". That I refused to eat out unless I could get everything skinless, oil/butter free, fat free, fun free... stress the waiter and kitchen staff out kind of requests. That "if I can do it, so can you" attitude. That smerking at people's post and thinking how sad and slothen they were bc of what they ate and the "excuses" that they made. I elevated myself above them because I felt what I was doing, will to do, and what I had accomplished was more important than the feelings of others. That I could judge them into change. I could passive-aggressively shame them into "better choices" based on my ideal of what was right and ideal or what some author said. That by telling people how sad it was for me to read and witness how they let themselves go or didn't care enough about the plan, the end goal, the dream to do what they had to do. That I was willing to be miserable, even at times when I didn't know it, all because what I was doing was better than what they weren't. The "look at me and what I'm willing to do without" mentality and the snarky smiles I gave to other women at the gym. Perhaps it was because I was the biggest Bitch in the world for the sake of being right, good, and moral with my food and body, that gives me a window into what I witness here and elsewhere with regards to body image, food, and fitness.

Then to see all of that and realize one day, I had all of my priorities half-a$$ backwards. The pain I caused others, the life I missed out on, and the poor example I was for my future children.
 
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I do agree changes as we get older require more effort and diet, especially, is less forgiving as we get older. Nutrition is huge...not only being accountable about how much we eat (calories) but also what we eat. Processed, sugar laden junk makes it so much tougher on our bodies and hormones. I find as I get older my body is way less tolerant of crappy food than it used to be! Not only from a weight perspective, but from how what I eat makes me feel (sluggish, lethargic, stomach upset, etc). It is also much harder for those that yo-yo dieted through the years as large fluctuations in weight throws many things off in the body (hormones, etc).

It is possible, but difficult, to be the best US we can be (not some phantom ideal in a magazine). Some of that is accepting what we are, but that doesn't equate to giving up. I truly believe that dramatic changes can happen if we want it, but it has to come from a place of self-love. If we workout hard and eat well because we love ourselves and our bodies (good self-esteem), rather than from a place of self-hatred (pointing out all our flaws to ourselves in the mirror with self-loathing) dramatic transformations can occur. Often times poor self esteem has only a little to do with how we look, and is much deeper and more complicated than we may realize. If we "punish" ourselves with tough workouts and hate every minute of it, there is little chance of long term results being maintained.

I read a really interesting article in the Oxygen Fat Loss special today about the Happiness Project and how it relates to our fitness goals. It talked about how so many people see happiness as something they are working for in the future...this ultimate goal instead of being happy in the moment they are living in. It's like this carrot stick we're trying to get to on an endless treadmill...always out of reach. "If only I lost this 30 lbs, got rid of this spare tire, saddlebags...whatever...then I will finally be happy." But once you reach that goal, you find another one, another reason to put off happiness. Once you change that mindset, often times the changes you are looking for will come with far less effort.
 
mrsprincess07 said:
And who are you to tell someone that they've given up? What gives you the right to judge the actions and feelings of someone about how they feel about THEIR body (not your's) as giving up?! Why is that ok? Because we don't look a certain way or wish to punnish ourselves into looking a certain way. Or at the very least spend our days pointing out every single flaw with self-shaming? Why should I hate myself and how I look? I don't, I love myself and my abilities and health (speaking for myself alone here) have nothing to do with the appearance of my body.I am the expert of me. I am the owner of my underpants and if I want anyone feeling "sad" for me, you'll be the first to know. Would you tolerate someone telling you that you've given up as a parent, employee, or marriage if you took an unpopular approach to your situation? I would hope not. So please, don't do that to others when it comes to their bodies. Because believe you me, we know OUR BODIES better than anyone. What you do, is your thing. more power to you either way, but don't expect that just bc others don't feel the same way that it's because we've "given up".
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What is said is it SOUNDS like you have given up. That is opinion after reading their posts. Since this is an open forum I assume others what my OPINION or they would not be posting here. The point I was making in my post is that each is the owner of their own body and if you choose to concentrate on the things you cannot have than you'll never know how successful you may have been in your pursuit. I don't feel sad for people who throw up their arms in defeat and play the "poor me" role. In fact I find it annoying. I think your comment was rude, and arrogant and that's my OPINION.
 
mrsprincess07 said:
A lot of people on the Cathe Forum as well as elswhere in the web-o-sphere talk about "clean eating". They "eat clean", the don't eat sugar, they workout extra hard and only fuel themselves with "proper" nutrition. Look at any weight loss thread and you'll see what I'm talking about. There are those that do talk about how eating a certain way was something they evolved with overtime as they got to know their bodies. But mostly you see throwing the Tosca Reno-style of clean eating and other nutrition rules around as if it makes them morally superior. That if you don't eat "cleanly" you can't lose weight, you can't lose the jiggle, the blah blah blah. They take on this attitude that it's "better" for you, your body, your health. It's a high and mighty persona that goes with turning their nose up at something the deem inferior. To live for the day when you can eat a cheat meal all in the hopes of getting or maintaining a few pounds lost. That living off green smoothies or some other form of "proper" nutrition will lead to advanced age and a tiny waistline. That by not going out to eat or by being a total pain-in-the-butt, high-maintenance eater, that they have some how elevated themselves above all else.

Perhaps it's just because I too was once one of those pain-in-the-butt, high maintenance eaters. Because I counter my calories and I avoided all things "bad" and opted only for the purest of "good". That I refused to eat out unless I could get everything skinless, oil/butter free, fat free, fun free... stress the waiter and kitchen staff out kind of requests. That "if I can do it, so can you" attitude. That smerking at people's post and thinking how sad and slothen they were bc of what they ate and the "excuses" that they made. I elevated myself above them because I felt what I was doing, will to do, and what I had accomplished was more important than the feelings of others. That I could judge them into change. I could passive-aggressively shame them into "better choices" based on my ideal of what was right and ideal or what some author said. That by telling people how sad it was for me to read and witness how they let themselves go or didn't care enough about the plan, the end goal, the dream to do what they had to do. That I was willing to be miserable, even at times when I didn't know it, all because what I was doing was better than what they weren't. The "look at me and what I'm willing to do without" mentality and the snarky smiles I gave to other women at the gym. Perhaps it was because I was the biggest Bitch in the world for the sake of being right, good, and moral with my food and body, that gives me a window into what I witness here and elsewhere with regards to body image, food, and fitness.

Then to see all of that and realize one day, I had all of my priorities half-a$$ backwards. The pain I caused others, the life I missed out on, and the poor example I was for my future children.
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If this fuels something so negative inside you, why do you visit fitness forums?
There isn't any one person on this forum who will not tell you that fitness and health begins with nutrition. Nutrition is the foundation to health- period.
Some people find it easy to follow Tosca Reno, Paleo, Primal, Precision Nutrition. I'm thankful for the information. I use what works for me and toss the rest out.
No judgments, just sharing.
 
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mrsprincess07 said:
A lot of people on the Cathe Forum as well as elswhere in the web-o-sphere talk about "clean eating".
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That's true. I do it too. I think the problem is that the term "clean eating" has taken on a life of its own, and it means so many different things to so many different people that it can be confusing. Is the person refering to a Paleo-style diet? A gluten-free diet? A vegan diet? And so on... There are so many different eating styles out there.

I think it was Tosca who brought the term into the mainstream, but I don't follow her particular set of rules. When I personally say "clean eating," I mean eating in a way that makes me feel best. And honestly, this is something that I tweak on a fairly regular basis. My dietary needs change as my body changes, for example through pregnancy, nursing, and getting older.

However, I don't look at foods as good or bad, angelic or evil. I just try to stay in touch with how they make me feel, and how they affect my body. This is particularly important for me, because I am a mother to a little girl and I want her to have a positive view of herself and a positive relationship with food and her body.

I guess what I'm saying is that these issues of body image and lifestyle affect each of us differently. I personally applaud any person who is trying to be the healthiest they can be. (And this definitely does not depend on looks or any particular eating style.)
 
mrsprincess07 said:
A lot of people on the Cathe Forum as well as elswhere in the web-o-sphere talk about "clean eating". They "eat clean", the don't eat sugar, they workout extra hard and only fuel themselves with "proper" nutrition. Look at any weight loss thread and you'll see what I'm talking about. There are those that do talk about how eating a certain way was something they evolved with overtime as they got to know their bodies. But mostly you see throwing the Tosca Reno-style of clean eating and other nutrition rules around as if it makes them morally superior. That if you don't eat "cleanly" you can't lose weight, you can't lose the jiggle, the blah blah blah. They take on this attitude that it's "better" for you, your body, your health. It's a high and mighty persona that goes with turning their nose up at something the deem inferior. To live for the day when you can eat a cheat meal all in the hopes of getting or maintaining a few pounds lost. That living off green smoothies or some other form of "proper" nutrition will lead to advanced age and a tiny waistline. That by not going out to eat or by being a total pain-in-the-butt, high-maintenance eater, that they have some how elevated themselves above all else.

Perhaps it's just because I too was once one of those pain-in-the-butt, high maintenance eaters. Because I counter my calories and I avoided all things "bad" and opted only for the purest of "good". That I refused to eat out unless I could get everything skinless, oil/butter free, fat free, fun free... stress the waiter and kitchen staff out kind of requests. That "if I can do it, so can you" attitude. That smerking at people's post and thinking how sad and slothen they were bc of what they ate and the "excuses" that they made. I elevated myself above them because I felt what I was doing, will to do, and what I had accomplished was more important than the feelings of others. That I could judge them into change. I could passive-aggressively shame them into "better choices" based on my ideal of what was right and ideal or what some author said. That by telling people how sad it was for me to read and witness how they let themselves go or didn't care enough about the plan, the end goal, the dream to do what they had to do. That I was willing to be miserable, even at times when I didn't know it, all because what I was doing was better than what they weren't. The "look at me and what I'm willing to do without" mentality and the snarky smiles I gave to other women at the gym. Perhaps it was because I was the biggest Bitch in the world for the sake of being right, good, and moral with my food and body, that gives me a window into what I witness here and elsewhere with regards to body image, food, and fitness.

Then to see all of that and realize one day, I had all of my priorities half-a$$ backwards. The pain I caused others, the life I missed out on, and the poor example I was for my future children.
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Isn't it possible to have a more balanced, middle of the road mindset on it all? Instead of veering from one extreme to the other, isn't it possible to eat well because we love the healthy foods we are eating, that it fuels are bodies and spirit, that it makes us feel good inside as well as out? Instead of looking at food as "fun" or not fun, unhealthy options as a comfort, and that "cheat" meals are something to look forward to, wouldn't it be better to view food from a more positive perspective? Healthy food doesn't have to be a "punishment". It doesn't have to be restrictive and we don't have to feel like we are "going without" if we enjoy what we are eating. This is the problem with most fad diets, especially low fat ones, where we feel deprived ALL the time. It's not sustainable and certainly not enjoyable. It's also really hard, but crucial, to break sugar addictions. I know this from a very personal perspective. I never had this issue myself, but have seen it with loved ones.
 
This has been a really interesting thread and thanks for all the constructive posts :)

It is such an ongoing balancing act, this "aging gracefully" thing isn't it :rolleyes::eek::p

For me it's always such a work in progress and an ongoing process of consciously (or trying to be conscious anyway :eek:) making choices whether they are the good, better or best options and then being utterly ok with my less than optimal choices so that I can fully enjoy and own them.

I have my - double workout green smoothie ultra veggie loaded days - and then I have my - I'm going to have pizza and drink wine days - and some days are a combination of the two - good exercise + veggies/lean protein + something indulgent...(those are probably the best days :D) and I enjoy all of it... I guess it's my version of moderation :D and overall it works pretty well for me.

Getting older (nearing 38 shortly) and realizing the better and best nutrition choices are becoming more important the older I get - is a reality and something I am ever more mindful of... as is my overall activity level, attention to portions, etc... but for me, it's not at the expense of my enjoyment of life. It will likely always be an ongoing evaluation of what is working or isn't - in all ways, not just my fitness/health goals, but am I enjoying the journey I'm on as it relates to the goals I've set or do I need more freedom to relax? Do I need to step it up a bit so I feel better and have more energy or is backing off what I most need? Should I do more green smoothies and juices for a few days to boost my immunity/etc? For me it's an ever evolving practice of tuning into the fluid needs of my whole being.

At this point in life attaining a fitness competitor figure is not my goal :) but staying healthy, active, fit and lean in what I hope will be a life-long sustainable way, is :D

Wishing you all contentment, joy and good health!
 
I second (third?) chammer's post. 'Nuf said. I loved this thread (I even copied all the posts into Word so I could continue reading after my lunch break). I think we're all on the same page that everyone's different and are passionate about different things and what we commit to. You ladies rock regardless of your fitness level.
 
Very interesting thread. I too have been dealing with the lovely changes that aging is throwing my direction. I'll be 50 in 2 months. I too have been trying to decide what I can realistically accomplish. I know that with the right guidance, education and discipline, I could see some major changes in my body. I may not be able to fight genetics, but I can be a leaner, stronger version of myself. But at the same time, I have to be honest with myself. What am I willing to do? What am I willing to give up? Will those changes make me happy? Or would I be happy keeping some of my vices and having a less than fit looking body. If I decide to do nothing, it doesn't mean I have given up. It just means that the balance in my life may not currently revolve around having a lean body. I hope that is not what I decide because I am not liking these age related changes. But at the same time, I know that I probably cannot go to a completely restrictive diet. So I will continue to work at finding my balance with both food and exercise and hopefully be able to maintain a healthy body and be accepting of myself with the decisions I make.

Jean
 
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