Way O/T, but need some feedback...

Dear Annette:

I think your post is a beautiful expression of the kind of honesty that it takes to overcome prejudice. It is unavoidable that we all have certain pre-conceived notions about everything from skin color to weight to social class to gender. It is when these thoughts go unexamined that they do damage, in some cases (Donna's acquaintance)to the person thinking them, but far too often and in devastating ways harm is done to the human objects of such non-thinking, whatever their perceived inferiority is.

As women, we have all experienced some form of descrimination; as athletic women, we get a special twist. Perhaps that is why we are capable of such empathy with Donna, and I'm hopeful that our collective cyber experience here is helping many walls come down as we practice getting along respectfully (most of the time) and agreeing that our differences are something to relish and become enriched by.

It may be a lifelong toil to break down bigotry, but as Donna would say, the joy is in the journey, and every bit of progress that is made reaps the benefit of being able to savor life's variety more fully.

Annette and Donna, I'm sure I'm not alone when I say that your articulate, humorous and warmly delivered messages here are what many of us look for when we log on. Thank you and all others who chimed in here, for this great "off-topic" thread that I think has served to draw all of us closer.

--Ann
 
My mouth dropped open too!!! I think reading your post has made us all really angry and feel hurt for you. Loads of people have already responded, and I don't know if I can add anything to make you feel better. I understand how you want to get your head around this so that you can put it to rest.

I think the thing to remember is that she is just one single person in the whole world. She is in the minority. And, SHE has lost YOU!!

Sharon.
 
How horrible for you!:-( It makes me so sad realizing that there are still such nasty, narrow minded and mean people out there in this day and age. Cyber hug from me!!!
 
I am just sitting here in shock right now. How can someone be so cruel? It just angers me so much when I hear of people being racist. I only pray that I am raising my children the right way. To respect and care for all people regardless of their skin color. I am sending you a big hug (( )) and hoping you know we here all care for you-Susan
 
Donna,

A "cyberfriend" from M&F Hers board told me about your experience. I am absolutely horrified! I told my friend that it never enters my mind to even THINK about what race a person is when I find I have something in common with someone I met on the Internet.

I can only imagine how terrible that email made you feel. Your post here actually brought tears to my eyes. This person is a disgrace to the human race. Maybe she can't help her upbringing, but to "spit" in the face of someone who took the time to help her just because of race, there is NO excuse for that!

Your "silly notion" that "none of us on this fitness journey were black, white, yellow or purple, but seekers of a healthier life style united!" applies to the majority of people, but there are those few who, I don't know, maybe just are too stupid to see.

You SHOULD feel insulted and angry- Anyone would! But don't let it bring you down or stop you from reaching out to the next person.

Maybe to bring closure to this experience, you should send her your post and our responses to it. Maybe it won't open her eyes, but then again, maybe she'll realize how much she hurt you by her thoughtlessness.

Take Care!
Diana
 
Donna,
As a latina, I have had my share of racists remarks said to me. But yes, my mouth was open from shock. But you know what, look at all the love that has come back to you ten fold from sisters of all races. Any normal, decent person would be in shock too. The devil really knows how to get in there, huh. You spent your time and emotions mentoring this woman and this is what she gives back. It is her loss, to say the least. Move on and get away from her hatred. You have inspired many women be they black, white and yes, you have even inspired a racist and she is probably so confused right now that a woman of color could be so kind, educated and be her MENTOR! I bet she is scared sh@tless right now because everything she had been taught about black people has been thrown out the window due to your example! You rock!!!!:)
 
RE: Donna - become an instructor / trainer

You've got the physical skills and fitness, you've got an awesome intuitive sense of safety and effectiveness issues regarding exercise form and performance, you've got an incredible personal experience to draw upon.

Get the ACE Group Fitness Instructor and/or Personal Trainer manuals, study your butt off, pass the ACE tests and get hired by one of your local clubs. And show that hog even more what a "n----r" can do.

A-Jock
 
NOW I have closure!........

I am sitting here in a blur of tears I am touched so deeply, not just for me, but for our society! We (as a society) really have come leaps and bounds, and this thread just goes to show that there is more love in this world than hate! :)

I have my closure, this thread completely wiped out all thoughts of that email and the feelings I was having! All I feel now is this overwhelming warmth and peace within. Thank you all! Love really does conquer all! :)

Donna

Fitness~ It's a journey, not a race!

p.s. And thank your lucky stars you can't hear me singing "We Are The World" right now ~ I'm tone death! :)
 
RE: NOW I have closure!........

I agree with what Clare said! Also, forgive, but never forget. Well, she deserved to lose your support! She deserves whatever else she gets, too. Only God can imagine what that will be.
 
RE: NOW I have closure!........

Hi Donna -

I'm glad you're ok now, but really, you didn't waste time thinking of that email. It was unbelievably rude, and uncalled for. It would hurt most peoples feelings.

You did nothing to deserve it, and it was not right, no matter how you look at it.

It is sad how some people seem to have the opinion that they are better because of their skin color. I can't imagine what would possess someone to think like that. What would? it has to be the way they were raised.

Even if they did have a bad experience with a person of another race, have they never had a bad experience with their own race?

Well, I'm happy for you!! Your post has been on my mind since I read it, mostly just because I just couldn't believe it either.

Have a great day!!!
 
Ann, Annette and Donna...

Ann, you expressed SO beautifully what I and I'm sure our entire membership, surely, is feeling. Thank you for your wonderful and just plain perfect post.

Donna, you continue to amaze me in every way. I deeply admire you.

Annette, as much as I look forward to the sophisticated laser humor in your posts, I also know that when an issue of gravity and sensitivity is presented by one of our members, you can be counted on to contribute comments that are thoughtful, honest, often provocative and always valuable. This time is no exception. I deeply admire you too, ma'am.

Thank you all three SO much.

I hope Cathe sees this thread, by the way. There's been a nastiness creeping into the Forums lately that I know many of us have noticed and that caused Cathe herself to post a reminder about Forum etiquette. Donna's thread ought to reassure Cathe, as it has me, that 99.9% of the people who come to commune here are world-class.

http://www.clicksmilie.de/sammlung/sport/sport003.gif Kathy S.
 
Donna, I am so sorry that you had to endure this kind of discrimination. People need to remember that color is only skin deep and that God made us all equal in HIS eyes. It was very distasteful for her to respond to you in this manner especially after all the help you had given her. There are some people out there that just can't get passed the color issue and obviously she is one of them. x( Alot of people judge all people on 1 person they meet and I would hope that you nor I would ever do that.:)


Again I am sooo sorry that you are having to deal with this and I hope that God can heal your wounds.

:)
 
((DONNA))

Sad to say, I'm not shocked that this woman would do this in this day and age. I'm AA as well, and many things have not changed. :(

Forget that ignorant lowlife and keep steppin' (To I MAX!)
I would have sent that broad an e-mail response that said, "Don't hate me because you AIN'T me!" :7

You are more of an inspiration and positive force that that idiot will ever be!

Love,
Kimba/Lilmermaid37
 
Doesn't matter how late I come into this post.

As an avid reader of all your messages, I love, honour and respect you, Donna! As, I'm sure, do most of the people on this forum. Think of that love, honour and respect as a humongous giant eraser, the size of the Empire State Building, and erase the nasty word and hurt and distress that misguided woman caused you!

Love Patricia (Eraserhead)
 
Hey Donna!I'm soo sorry that you had to experience this person's ignorance. I was besides myself when I read your post!My heart ached for you to read that response especially after all you had did for this person! Don't let this negativity get you down, stand tall keep your chin up(shoulders back ;) and stay positive! You have alot to offer and are an inspiration to us all! This person, on the otherhand, has lost bigtime for not having you in their life anymore!;) You are very special to all of us here ! I apologize for not seeing this sooner, I just wanted to tell you that I was sorry that you had that very unfortunate situation!Take care and hang in there!
 
{{{Donna}}}

Donna, I'm glad you are feeling better about this.

You'll have to excuse me as my feelings are still raw even after walking away for a couple of hours before I posted. I cycled through feeling disgust, sadness and then sick to my stomach. Such unfounded nastiness just brings tears to my eyes and I'm so sorry this happened to such a special person.

So, just be glad that you don't have to deal with this person on a daily basis and be reminded of her nastiness. She'll never find another person like you who has been through similar battles and is selflessly willing to spend their time providing support. It will be her loss and I can't help but hope that she suffers greatly without your help.

I am so encouraged to see all the posts by all your friends and hope that you will not let one nasty person change your 'cyberspirit' one iota!

I appreciate you and all the gifts you share. I'm so glad that I've gotten to know you a bit.

Take care,
 
All I can say, Donna, is it is her loss! But please find a way to let go of it. She is ignorant as all racists are and to let her stay inside that wonderful head of yours for a moment longer is to give her something she does not deserve. Color is such a superficial thing. How can people make so much of it? I was floored when I read that horrible word! But it's just a word and you know what you are: an awesome and inspiring woman of color! To heck with that loser!

xo

Bobbi
 
I first became aware of your post on the mum board (and posted a reply there) but wanted to read the replys here. I was so angry the first time I read your post yesterday. I showed it to my dh and he was shaking his head about the ignorance of people.

I checked out your story on the fitnessvideofanatics sight. You are at true inspiration.
 
I am having trouble coming up with anything more to say after all these beautiful words of wisdom and support. I too have read your story and are so inspired by you. What a true loss for that person. It is almost beyond belief that someone could be so cruel and shallow. I just wanted to let you know how sad I was that you had to bear such a comment and that I am yet one more of many here who sees what a beautiful person you are.

Alison
 
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