Prayers For ReneePruitt
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ReneePruitt
Cathlete
Thank you for asking, I am taking things one day at a time, I think I went back to work to soon. I have days I cry all day long and others I can muster up smiles. It is only part time so she never gave me grief pay so I had to go back to pay some bills. I have ate so much! I know a lot of people lose weight but I don't I eat and eat. I keep jogging but no lifting and I feel soft and mushy. But that makes depression even more.
I am confused and angry and sad. There's so many emotions. Just today I came home from work and me and hubby looked at each other knowing we both had a bad day. Ryan was on our minds so much today. It comes in waves. I think we are still shocked. I looked at him he looked at me and we just hugged and cried in the yard. Asking will we ever get over this? He apologizes to me cause he try's to be strong. Then some days we move along in are day, just like floating, the world keeps moving and it seems so unnatural. I picture the wreck in my mind over and over, I see him in my mind and pray he didn't hurt or was scared. I sometimes think it should have been me not ryan. 23 years old to young and the most Georgia's boy I ever saw in my life. He didn't deserve this. I have a lot of questions for God and I hope he talks to me soon.
Ryan's truck was red so every red truck I see my heart skips. I want him back so bad. It was so sudden. So hard to explain. I feel some days I am dying or can't take one more breath but I have another son so what do u do? I have no choice, I have to keep going. Thanks for asking and I'm sorry to depress everyone. But I can say I really do feel the prayers I think prayers from others and some Xanax helps lol along with my sense of humor I try to keep up helps. My son was so funny and made me laugh so much. He helped me alt with my moms passing two yrs ago. So I try to remember those things he told me then and that helps some to.
Renee - I don't know how anyone can go on with their lives without having all the feelings you are having with losing your son in a tragic car accident. I can not even imagine it. My heart goes out to you and your family. The hard part is that life goes on, even though, your life has stopped. One of my sons was hit by a car as a pedestrian and was in a coma for 3 months. He was 24 when he was hit. The emotions I had then ran so high. I had to live one day at a time. That was 11 years ago. He has a traumatic brain injury and will never be who he was before he was hit, so there are times I mourn that loss of losing my son, as who he was. He needs 24/7 supervision and has a mentality of a child, but the sexual drive of an adult male. It's very difficult for all of us, but we have come to the point where it is natural now.
I know there will probably never be a time that your son's death will feel natural, though. I can see why you would be angry at God. All I did was pray to The Lord that if my son were to be in a vegetative state for Him to take him home to Himself. I have bee praying for you through these dark days. I am glad to see that you have your husband and you are grieving together. Many couples tear each other up and blame the other one and their marriage falls apart. Just know that you are surrounded by angels and that God does love you.
Cheryl
I know there will probably never be a time that your son's death will feel natural, though. I can see why you would be angry at God. All I did was pray to The Lord that if my son were to be in a vegetative state for Him to take him home to Himself. I have bee praying for you through these dark days. I am glad to see that you have your husband and you are grieving together. Many couples tear each other up and blame the other one and their marriage falls apart. Just know that you are surrounded by angels and that God does love you.
Cheryl
ReneePruitt
Cathlete
Cheryl
Wow I am sorry about your son too! So much tragedy it is just unreal. I pray and go through a lot of questioning him. I was angry then not then angry, I am hoping to go to counseling soon. I am trying to think of something to do to keep his name alive and do something he'd want me to do for others. I have a few ideas but not sure how to get it going. Hard to think right now, I keep forgetting stuff. I even forget where I am driving to at times !!
Wow I am sorry about your son too! So much tragedy it is just unreal. I pray and go through a lot of questioning him. I was angry then not then angry, I am hoping to go to counseling soon. I am trying to think of something to do to keep his name alive and do something he'd want me to do for others. I have a few ideas but not sure how to get it going. Hard to think right now, I keep forgetting stuff. I even forget where I am driving to at times !!
tralaiven
Cathlete
Renee, all I can say is that you are not depressing. You are dealing with difficult reality and simply being honest. It will take time to heal and just get through it and that is ok. Grieving takes time and time and time. I know that when I was grieving through my loss I couldn't think straight, forgot stuff, had really bad headaches...just from the grief, and a lot I don't remember because it was just too much to bear. But honestly, my faith in God's goodness got me through the times I was even angry at Him and the times I thought that I really truly was going to lose my mind, as I came to realize that this is a fallen world, but He is still in control and loves.
Nanbo
Cathlete
HI Renee,
You are NOT depressing any of us! While we may not be able to relate to your particular grief, many of us can certainly relate to grief itself. Based on my own experiences, I totally get how it comes at you in waves. This will never go away...it will ALWAYS hurt; but the waves start to be further apart and not as soul crushing as they are now. Many people would tell me about the "wheel" of grief; that you move from one stage of grief to the next (disbelief, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance). But I found that you can also travel up and down the "spokes" of the wheel and move back and sideways between these emotions...it has never been moving from one stage to the next for me. One day I'd feel like I was in Acceptance and then I go back to Anger the next. And the Depression seemed to run its own underlying course though it all. There is no handbook for grief. You will get through this in the way that is comforting to your own mind and body. It's wonderful that you and your DH can stay connected through this tragedy and be there to comfort each other when the "lost" feeling becomes overwhelming. One day at a time, Renee, one day at a time.
You are NOT depressing any of us! While we may not be able to relate to your particular grief, many of us can certainly relate to grief itself. Based on my own experiences, I totally get how it comes at you in waves. This will never go away...it will ALWAYS hurt; but the waves start to be further apart and not as soul crushing as they are now. Many people would tell me about the "wheel" of grief; that you move from one stage of grief to the next (disbelief, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance). But I found that you can also travel up and down the "spokes" of the wheel and move back and sideways between these emotions...it has never been moving from one stage to the next for me. One day I'd feel like I was in Acceptance and then I go back to Anger the next. And the Depression seemed to run its own underlying course though it all. There is no handbook for grief. You will get through this in the way that is comforting to your own mind and body. It's wonderful that you and your DH can stay connected through this tragedy and be there to comfort each other when the "lost" feeling becomes overwhelming. One day at a time, Renee, one day at a time.
CDPotier
Cathlete
Nothing that I went through
Nothing that I went through can compare to your loss. My son was in a coma for a month, and the doctors never even said if he would live. I was at his side when he woke up. He will also never be the same after his accident, and he had two strokes. At least, he is alive.
Vent and cry here all you want. I cannot imagine the loss of a child. My prayers are with you.
Nothing that I went through can compare to your loss. My son was in a coma for a month, and the doctors never even said if he would live. I was at his side when he woke up. He will also never be the same after his accident, and he had two strokes. At least, he is alive.
Vent and cry here all you want. I cannot imagine the loss of a child. My prayers are with you.
ReneePruitt
Cathlete
I just wanted to say I thank all of you for your prayers. I really do feel them!! I decorated a cross to put by the road today where the accident happened. It was not as bad as I thought I'd be. I felt good decorating it. My husband cut it and painted it. He had a hard time making it then I did. He cried doing it. I wanted to get it done because I thought it would help us somehow. It helped me some. I ask for continued prayers cause I can not function without my faith. That's the only hope I can hold on to. That one day I will see him one day. Thanks to all of your kind words
*crazysoccermom*
Cathlete
Renee,
I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine your pain and grief.
My cousin lost her 14 year old daughter a few years ago. She was thrown from a truck and wasn't wearing her seatbelt. For her, it helped to start a foundation in her name to raise seatbelt awareness. I know it still pains her everyday, and not a day goes by that she doesn't miss her sweet daughter.
((HUGS)) Take your time and realize that there is no set of rules for your grief to follow. Take it one day at a time, and your virtual cheering club is here to lift you up when you need it. You will never forget, and the pain will always be there .. but one day you will learn to function with it.
I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine your pain and grief.
My cousin lost her 14 year old daughter a few years ago. She was thrown from a truck and wasn't wearing her seatbelt. For her, it helped to start a foundation in her name to raise seatbelt awareness. I know it still pains her everyday, and not a day goes by that she doesn't miss her sweet daughter.
((HUGS)) Take your time and realize that there is no set of rules for your grief to follow. Take it one day at a time, and your virtual cheering club is here to lift you up when you need it. You will never forget, and the pain will always be there .. but one day you will learn to function with it.
ReneePruitt
Cathlete
Thank you for asking. I guess I am doing ok I hear people say I'm doing well and I'm so strong, some days I feel stronger then other days. I write a lot that helps I keep exercising. It is hard to explain really just a heaviness no matter what I do or go. But I keep trying to trust God new it was time he served his purpose on the earth. He touched more people then I have in all my years. I think if him everyday and every second but I did that when he was alive. I mean even when he was here my world seem to be on them every thought took me back to how are the boys I'd posture them at work ousted to go to store and see stuff I wanted to get him. We don't realize how much we do think of them and what they are doing now my mind Goes there and now sadly I know what he is ding. He is asleep Till Jesus comes. So I have to have faith he is coming back! God bless you
karenc1
Cathlete
Renee i am a mother of three children who has lost her oldest dd. First I am very sorry for your loss. I know the pain is not just emotional, but physical in that I felt a real pain inside my heart. That is the only way I can describe it and I am so sorry that you have suffered the loss of your son.
I think you will always feel his loss, but over time, the grief and pain you are feeling will be less sharp. It will always be there, but it will quiet down. That's the only way I can describe it but I hope you feel a little comfort from that description.
Another thing that my mother said to me that made me feel comforted was the following. Your child is not suffering anymore. They are at peace. The only one who is suffering is you and your child is not feeling any pain. You are reliving painful memories and moments that don't exist anymore. For some reason, that made me feel better.
Over time I realized that if I wanted to make my child's life matter and have meaning, that I needed to conduct my life in a way that honored their existence. I mean that your child had a short time on this earth and you need to make your time on this earth matter, out of respect to him. No one can take away your memories of your son.
I felt angry and alone when I lost my dd. Later,, I came to realize that I wasn't unique. There are so many people around us who have their own burdens and losses that they are struggling with. It took a long time for me to come to that realization. I became a person that was able to be more aware of how other people have their own life struggles, losses and suffering. My child gave me that gift of awareness, and somehow it makes me feel like my child's life matters more, because they were able to make such an impact on me as a person. However, for now, you are mourning the loss of your son and rightly so.
I hope over time your pain will lessen even though it won't completely disappear. Your son mattered. I'm sorry for your loss.
Hi Renee
I cannot comprehend the emotional turmoil that you and your family are experiencing at the moment. I would like to think that here on the forums we are like some kind of internet community that really feels love and compassion for each other. Over the years we've all got to know each other on the fitness boards. My heartfelt sympathies and hugs are sent to you and your family.
You will be in my prayers and hope that your faith will be a source of strength to you.
God bless
Laura
xx
I cannot comprehend the emotional turmoil that you and your family are experiencing at the moment. I would like to think that here on the forums we are like some kind of internet community that really feels love and compassion for each other. Over the years we've all got to know each other on the fitness boards. My heartfelt sympathies and hugs are sent to you and your family.
You will be in my prayers and hope that your faith will be a source of strength to you.
God bless
Laura
xx
ReneePruitt
Cathlete
Thanks to you both.
I have been thinking of ways to honor him, I still exercise I pretend he is with me or he is cheering me on.
I'm thinking a lot but I'm writing a lot so I'm hoping I can help others. And you are right there are so many mothers going through this. It's so sad, I know a few moms close to out home town in 2009 and 2011 but I thought man that's awful so awful that I did not WANT to think what they were going through it was to scary for some reason but I would pray for there comfort. But I also am on a group on fb and a lot of them are still hurting years later, that's scary. So yes I am planning on being as proactive as possible. I am hoping to write my sons story to help others. But I am taking it a day at a time. I recluse to let this keep me from honoring him. Thanks for all if ur kind words
I have been thinking of ways to honor him, I still exercise I pretend he is with me or he is cheering me on.
I'm thinking a lot but I'm writing a lot so I'm hoping I can help others. And you are right there are so many mothers going through this. It's so sad, I know a few moms close to out home town in 2009 and 2011 but I thought man that's awful so awful that I did not WANT to think what they were going through it was to scary for some reason but I would pray for there comfort. But I also am on a group on fb and a lot of them are still hurting years later, that's scary. So yes I am planning on being as proactive as possible. I am hoping to write my sons story to help others. But I am taking it a day at a time. I recluse to let this keep me from honoring him. Thanks for all if ur kind words