My husband doesn't think I NEED the presale items!

wendybdh

wendybdh

Cathlete
I REALLY, REALLY want to order the presale items but my husband thinks it is too much money. I tried telling him what a bargain it was and that I won't ask for anything for my birthday (in October) or for Christmas (using the same tactics I used with my parents when I was 8). Unfortunately, the only answer I'm getting is "we'll think about it" and that "we still have 10 days to decide." So if anyone has any tips or ideas that will help me convince him how much I NEED these videos please let me know! Thanks, Wendy
 
Tell him the cost per video. Tell him this benefits you by being able to get a good work out at home, stay healthy and fit..... If you can site the differences these workouts have demonstrated. Tell him this is what you really want and that if he buys it now it will be cheaper and no going to the mall trying to come up with gift ideas. Best I can do. Hopefully others will have some ideas too.
Good luck.
Marie
 
Just order them - he'll get over it.

Sorry to be so blunt but that is how I work that tactic. Does he ask your permission when he wants something???

Dawn
 
I'm in agreement with Dawn on this one.

Another thing you could try is pre-ordering from CK Sales. I've never done it, but I've heard from others that you don't get charged until the items actually ship. That'll give you some time to save for it.
 
Well, you're not a child and he's not your parent (in this day and age why is anyone putting up with "you're not allowed" unless they're a child or it's illegal). I realise he's your husband and I have no idea how your income is split (don't worry I'm not asking!) but unless you have some agreement whereby you are not allowed to spend anything at all without his permission because you have been bad then tell him to stop being ridiculous. If you want to buy something with your money that's your choice and it really doesn't have a lot to do with him or anyone else. If he is supporting you then why not tell him you'll pay it back out of the money you get over time. Or you could tell him, you'll pay for it using the money you would have spent on buying food for him, which he's no longer going to get until he joins the 21st Century ;)

I have both been financially supported and given financial support and I wouldn't even dream of saying "You're not allowed..." or "You don't need...". Everything is up for discussion and everything must be agreed upon. If one of us isn't happy with a decision then that decision does not get made until we are both happy. End of story.

Good luck!
ATB,
- Lisa :)
 
Holy cow! I agree with Dawn. Just order them! :D

They're important to you, you LOVE working out...that should be reason enough.
 
I try to stay out of these threads these days ... but this one got to me. I have to say I'm in agreement with the majority of the posters here before me. You are not a child, and he is not your parent. I can understand if he's the breadwinner perhaps and "controls" the bills in your house (I do it in mine), but you are his wife - not his property. What's that saying ... it's easier to beg forgiveness than to ask permission? I don't normally get involved in people's private lives (especially strangers online!), but my goodness ... this sounds a bit controlling of him. Forgive me for saying so, but that's how your post reads. Even though I take care of the bills in our house, I don't make my husband "ask" my "permission" before he buys something. He lets me know he's doing it so we don't accidently bounce a check or go over a credit card limit, but he certainly isn't expected to ask my permission or wait for me to allow him to buy something he really wants. That's so demeaning. Order them already. They're a true bargain at the presale price, and on VF they're talking about emails which said the presale prices are ending at the end of this month. Either he lets you spend the money now, or you'll end up spending over $100 more in the future if you buy them all. It's a no-brainer to me, but hey ... it's only my humble opinion here. Hope I didn't offend you or anyone. :(

Carol
 
I can see both sides of the issue. On the one hand, you're not a child and DH is not a parent. However, marriages are among other things financial relationships, and who's to say that this kind of expenditure doesn't warrant some discussion? I know that my DH and I discuss purchases of anything much over $20 with each other - but we always say "OK" to the other.

My rationale for exercise expenditures is: for every dollar I spend on good, high-quality exercise equipment of any kind, I believe I'm saving 30- to 50-fold the original expense in terms of no doctor's or pharmacist's bills for the many health consequences for sedentary living. And for every minute I spend in purposive, safe exercise I know I'm saving myself hours in a doctors office in the short AND long-term. Far too many people think that exercisers exercise for vanity's one sake, and that exercise is a luxury, when in fact it is of first importance in one's health and mobility. And this is true no matter what age you are.

Love,

A-Jock
 
Ditto with what Dawn said..If I were to wait for my husband to give me the go ahead I'd never get the things that I want.
I preordered without telling him a damned thing and I'm just 60 dollars away from paying it off which will be done when my next statement comes in. Once they come home he probably won't even know the difference. He never asks me when he buys stuff or goes with the fellas after work for a drink or two, so why should I?
 
My husband was trying to play me bogus on ordering those DVD's and I just let him HAVE IT!!! I explained the importance of exercise in your life along with DIET!!! And made him look at the difference in me 6 months ago and now. I lost 60 lbs and it was through dedication and hard work. I am the most toned I have been in my life at 43. I told him this is money investing in my life and not a bunch of BS. He stepped back with that not ordering those DVD's because I was ready to whip into him and what HE NEEDS TO DO TO LOOSE WEIGHT AND START AN EXERCISE REGIMEN, INSTEAD OF SITTING ON THE COUCH WITH A BUD AND HOAGY ALMOST EVERYDAY!!! MEN, I COULD LITERALLY WRITE A BOOK!!! Girl, go on and order those DVD's, especially if you work everyday as he does. If you do not, spread the cost of the DVD's as part of your weekly food bill, (if he looks at the books) and when the DVD's arrive, bring them out one at a time over a period of time. Believe me, he will not notice one bit.


Linda Robinson
"I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it." ...Maya Angelou
 
I read this post earlier and didn't have time to post. I would have said what A-jock said, so I won't repost that answer. Just wanted to add that every marriage has to negotiate their finanaces in their own way. Some people merge their finances and some keep their finances separate, so it can get a little sticky giving out advice without being properly informed. When someone asks for workout advice we often ask for background information. Maybe finances are tight or the poster is an overspender. Talk it over with your husband if this is not a control issue or financial burden the happiness and health issues will probably overcome :).
 
I am going to skip over all the sticky issues associated with this one and just say that perhaps you could point out the difference in the presale price and the price that will be charged later. If you wait until your birthday or Christmas to order, you'll be paying a ton more.
 
I agree with Jordan and Ajock. It is my belief when a husband and wife start buying things without a discussion, financial problems could develop. I doubt he is controlling, maybe $ is a little tight right now and other things take precedence. No need to get worked up people.:)
 
I think this is pretty basic. If money is an issue then it needs to be discussed before ordering. And if money is that tight and you want to perhaps give up a gift from Christmas or some other special day in exchange, like you suggested, then I think that's a legitimate concession that might be tried.
In the end we don't know the whole story anyway and probably should not offer any advice at all.
I will say that I think that telling someone to just "order them, he'll get over it", when they have mentioned possible money concerns is very irresponsible advice.
T.
 
You are an adult. You order the DVDs you want. You help pay for them with all the work you do, whether salaried ot not. I am totally in agreement with the majority, as begun by Dawn and well expressed by Shywolf.

I am having my DVDs as my Christmas present also, since that is when they will come out.

As far as giving advice goes: hell, the lady came on here for advice and she received it. And since she is an adult woman, she can read it, ponder it, and then make up her own mind as to what course of action she wants to take.

Clare
 
Here's my background info. My husband and I just started a carpet cleaning business a few weeks ago so money is somewhat tight. We both just finished grad school. I am the only source of income in the house(I am a dental hygienist) and we make most financial decisions together. I rarely spend money on myself, in fact we are both pretty frugal. I have taken everyone's suggestions into consideration and have decided to sell some of my beginner workout tapes so I can buy the presale. Thanks to everyone.
 
>I REALLY, REALLY want to order the presale items but my
>husband thinks it is too much money. I tried telling him what
>a bargain it was and that I won't ask for anything for my
>birthday (in October) or for Christmas (using the same tactics
>I used with my parents when I was 8). Unfortunately, the only
>answer I'm getting is "we'll think about it" and that "we
>still have 10 days to decide." So if anyone has any tips or
>ideas that will help me convince him how much I NEED these
>videos please let me know! Thanks, Wendy


I suggest purchasing the set from CK sales (they don't charge your credit card until the order ships. Here's the link:

http://www.cksales.com/shopdisplayproducts.asp?id=126&cat=All+New

Save up bit by bit and when the bill comes you'll have the money to pay for it.

I understand about money issues within a marriage. It can be tough sometimes but if you want it badly enough you can usually find a way.

Good luck:)

Coletta
 
You're welcome Wendy, and I hope no one offended you with their advice. In retrospect, I feel like I should have had more background information before I let my fingers fly! We're not exactly rolling in money around here either, and as I said ... even though I do the bills, my husband and I still talk about purchases so we don't mess anything up. So ... I hope you can order the DVD's, and I hope your business gets up and running for you very soon!! Good luck with that! Starting a business is tough work.

Carol
:)
 
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