RE: Hey Wendy!
My husband and I have done a fair amount of marriage counseling (myself more than him.) We also own a business together. From observing couples who have problems in marriage and couples who become very happy together, it often starts with the simple fact of both people putting the welfare of the marriage above their own wishes and desires. A husband or a wife who has a happy marriage as a high priority will not carry the attitude of "how dare you tell me what to do" but rather will have the attitude "I'll sacrifice if needed for a satisfying marriage." Sometimes finding that solution takes a long time, but when both people respect the other person's position and KNOW that their partner also highly values the happiness and health of the marriage, there is usually a mutually satisfying answer to the problem. If a husband or a wife feels entitled to spend money on whatever they really want, what is the person who pays the bills supposed to do when there isn't enough? It goes back to putting WE above ME. In our own experience, we have had many years of being below poverty level and now many years of being what most people would say is wealthy. We NEVER could have been successful if either one of us felt entitled to spend money on what we thought we "needed" (like clothes!) and we each needed the other person to keep us accountable to that. He had to tell me, "No, we just don't have the money for you to go out to lunch like that" and I had to say, "I'm sorry, you can't go to the movies with your friends." It was frustrating and difficult to truly NOT have ANY extra money, but when you know you both have a bigger more satisfying goal as the main goal, then the smaller sacrifices that you have to make, make sense in the long run. Placing OUR happiness above MY happiness is a lifestyle that is rewarding. That is why you would let your husband tell you that you can't spend money. Frankly, I am extremely thankful for our time of poverty. I learned to be CREATIVE, that I CAN remodel a house on $1000 and a year a of sweat, I learned how to do ebay and generate cash at any time, and I learned that living debt free is worth it! Most importantly, I learned that we are team, I can fully trust my husband, and he can fully count on me.
It's worth it though, isn't it? Even though I cannot afford to lose any more, being barely an A cup anyway. ;-) 
