Two days ago was my one year fitness anniversary. The first day that I made a serious commitment not only to exercise, but to my health, my mental well being and to putting me first.
The first half of last year were some of the darkest days of my life. Everything had gone wrong and I felt like my life had fallen apart. I was seriously depressed and scared to face every day. I wanted to curl up in a ball and just not hurt anymore. Even with this horrible despair in my heart I knew that I didn't want to give up. I needed some help and a plan.
I made two important decisions. Decision one was therapy. Even though I am a therapist by profession, I am not immune to twisting my own internal thoughts and feelings to such an extent that I do not see the forest through the trees. I knew I needed an objective observer and voice to pull my out of my depressive haze. My therapist has been and continues to be a blessing in my life.
Decision two was pulling out an old Kathy Smith video on July 19, 2003 and making a solemn oath to myself that I was going to work out 5 days a week from there on out. Even if I could only muster 10 minutes, then 10 minutes it was. But the 5 days per week was non negoiable. And the first month quite frankly sucked. My body ached all the time and exercise was more of a chore than something fun to do. But I stuck it out.
So, a year later things are really different. First, I look forward to 'my time' which is the time I take out of each day to work out (I now try to do something every day with one day being very gentle like yoga or stretching). Exercise helps not only with my health (have lowered my body fat to under 20%, lowered my blood pressure, etc.) but with my emotional and psychological well being. I use exercise to de-stress, to feel confident, to feel empowered and strong. I have a great onlook on life now. There will always be dark days in my future. I know I have what it takes to make it through and come out even better on the 'other side'. And I'm genuinely happy. I feel wonderful, look wonderful and am wonderful, just as I am!
I've been a member of this site for over a year now. So many of you have offered support, encouragement, LOTS of humor, and genuine caring not just to me, but in every post that you write, to so many others. I feel a part of this community and I thank you all for making this such a wonderful place to just be.
That's my story!!!
The first half of last year were some of the darkest days of my life. Everything had gone wrong and I felt like my life had fallen apart. I was seriously depressed and scared to face every day. I wanted to curl up in a ball and just not hurt anymore. Even with this horrible despair in my heart I knew that I didn't want to give up. I needed some help and a plan.
I made two important decisions. Decision one was therapy. Even though I am a therapist by profession, I am not immune to twisting my own internal thoughts and feelings to such an extent that I do not see the forest through the trees. I knew I needed an objective observer and voice to pull my out of my depressive haze. My therapist has been and continues to be a blessing in my life.
Decision two was pulling out an old Kathy Smith video on July 19, 2003 and making a solemn oath to myself that I was going to work out 5 days a week from there on out. Even if I could only muster 10 minutes, then 10 minutes it was. But the 5 days per week was non negoiable. And the first month quite frankly sucked. My body ached all the time and exercise was more of a chore than something fun to do. But I stuck it out.
So, a year later things are really different. First, I look forward to 'my time' which is the time I take out of each day to work out (I now try to do something every day with one day being very gentle like yoga or stretching). Exercise helps not only with my health (have lowered my body fat to under 20%, lowered my blood pressure, etc.) but with my emotional and psychological well being. I use exercise to de-stress, to feel confident, to feel empowered and strong. I have a great onlook on life now. There will always be dark days in my future. I know I have what it takes to make it through and come out even better on the 'other side'. And I'm genuinely happy. I feel wonderful, look wonderful and am wonderful, just as I am!
I've been a member of this site for over a year now. So many of you have offered support, encouragement, LOTS of humor, and genuine caring not just to me, but in every post that you write, to so many others. I feel a part of this community and I thank you all for making this such a wonderful place to just be.
That's my story!!!