Pessimistic people

Well, I personally think it has a lot to do with genetics. I weigh less than I did prior to having my two children and am in better shape (ran my first 1/2 marathon last year), but my body is not the same. I have a thicker waist and some saggy or loose skin on my lower abdomen. I used to get compliments on my nice abs, but I really don't show them anymore. I love my kids, so I would have traded in my "perfect" abs for them again any day. It's like I try to teach my kids, what is really important is what is on the inside. Sadly, that is a hard thing to do in today's society. :-( Not that I'm saying people shouldn't be proud of how they look, just that it shouldn't be the most important thing in their life. OK, off my soap box. :)
 
I agree with what Marsha just said.

I am pretty fit, lifted weights/worked out for many years before having my 3 kids (the last of which was 9lbs 13 oz!). I can't say I look better now, necessarily, but it depends on where you look, ha ha!..... I had a pretty good "two pack" ALMOST 4 pack abs before, that I didn't hesitate to show off....and now I have the loose and damaged skin around my belly button so I doubt I will ever wear a bikini again, no matter how hard I work out. But I can still have ripped arms and awesome legs, right! I am a size 4 jeans with a flat tummy. The only thing that is changed is that I don't wear a two piece anymore. Big whup.

It is just an individual thing. Not everyone can look like Cathe before or after! But that doesn't mean you can't still have a good positive image about your body and have joy in your heart and hold your head high about how you look, and be in good shape/fit.

You can have the body...or nearly so...that you had before, but now you have to do it "on purpose"! I know you already are doing it on purpose, but I think most people (those who don't work out) when they have kids, and they age, their body is not so forgiving anymore, and they can't get away with the abuse (poor eating and not working out) they used to be able to get away with and still look the same. Instead of the light bulb going off, they blame the childbearing.


Jen
 
First of all, I have 3 beautiful girls & would never trade that for anything. AND, I also have Factor V Leiden & have yet to meet someone else that has it!!!!!! Make sure you have a good OB that knows what's going on. I also had to make bi-weekly/ monthly trips to the hematologist to monitor my blood. I was on Heparin/ Lovenox injections throughout my pregnancies but did not have ANY other complications. It wasn't so bad once I got used to the daily shots. Make sure you have good insurance as the shots are EXPENSIVE. (if we'd had to pay out of pocket it would have been $1,000+ a month!)

As for me, I was overweight before getting pg & gained too much weight each time on top of that. But, I ended up losing a lot of weight after my 3rd child now am 40 lbs lighter than when I got pg w/ my 1st dd (who's now 8!). I do have the stretch marks to prove it though!

Anyway, let me know if you have any questions about Factor V. Another something to think about is that my hematologist told me that I could NOT have an epidural as it could risk a blood clot in my spine so I had all 3 kids all-natural. It can be done! ;-)
 
I don't have children and can't comment from personal experience, but based upon what I know from friends and family members who *have* given birth, post-pregnancy effects vary from person-to-person, so it is plain dumb for your co-workers to assume they can predict what will happen to your body. I think some of it has to do with genetics, and some of it has to do with how hard you're willing to work.

I agree that your subject line says it all - these are the naysayers who don't like to see other people succeed. I imagine that there might already be some jealousy about your current level of fitness. Their comments were designed to make you worry - DON'T! This reminded me of being a kid about to enter junior high ~ my extended family members all said, "Just wait til you get to junior high. You won't be able to keep up those grades!" It was almost as if they WANTED me to fall on my face b/c my cousins weren't exactly what you'd call high achievers. When you're doing well, there's always SOMEBODY out there who wants to shake your tree. It's what pessimists do. They have to p*ss on your parade so they can feel better about themselves (and their own failures).

As you can see from the experienced moms on the boards here, it IS possible to be even *more* fit than you were pre-pregnancy. How awesome & inspiring! But the bottom line is that none of us can completely escape the effects of aging, anyway. In my view, the rewards of having a family would make having a sag here or there completely unimportant.

Best of luck! Don't let them get you down.
Cathy :)

Edited to fix a typo :)
 
Remember to only eat 300 calories more than baseline. For a 5'5" woman who is 125lbs at pre-pregnancy weight, her pre-pregnancy calories should be 1400 (plus extra if she is active). Only add 300.

I normal weight woman should only gain around 25 lbs w/ pregnancy.

Pregnancy is not an excuse to eat more. It is a reason to eat even healthier!

-Becky
2nd year med student
 
From my experience, staying in shape really helped with labour and bouncing back (wich is a no brainer). Honestly though, no matter what happens astheticly, its so so worth it! javascript:smilie(':)')
javascript:smilie(':)')
 
If you think the unsolicited advice is bad now, just wait until you're pregnant with #1. Oy vey!

I have 3 children and the resultant excess skin, stretchmarks, and all that. Yep, the "nightmare" scenario. But if that's the price of having 3 healthy children, I was more than willing to pay it. And you know, the "exterior" stuff tends to fade away in importance once your children are here in the world. I'm far more comfortable in my imperfect skin now than I was 20 years ago, before kids.

Much of how your body bounces back after pregnancy depends on genetics. Taking care of yourself is important, but all the clean eating and exercise in the world won't prevent stretch marks if you're genetically inclined toward them. It just is what it is.
 
Until you have children no one can say what will happen. If you are fit you should have no problems. I had twins! I am currently 5'8" 135 lbs. I immediately lost my baby weight, however, I was sick for the first 20 weeks and lost 25lbs I made up for it the final weeks and ended up at 145 lbs emergency C-Section and my son was 2 years later I was 145 all baby I have NOT ONE STRETCH MARK just my tiny C-Section scar. I did not breastfeed can not help you there but I am a 34B and no sagging going on not that there is much to sag but I know a few women my size and they have complaints all the time about them being droopy.

Do not stress over something that is in your control (exercise and eating right) out of your control (genes you inherit)

beth6395

"Another one that proves equipment is not necessary to get the job done" -Cathe Friedrich
 
"Anyway, let me know if you have any questions about Factor V. Another something to think about is that my hematologist told me that I could NOT have an epidural as it could risk a blood clot in my spine so I had all 3 kids all-natural. It can be done!"


Wow, Jess! That's a little scary! I didn't know that. I just found out last Friday that I have Factor V and my ob/gyn is on maternity leave! I have so many questions and I know that treatment varies according to the person/doctor. I guess I will cross that bridge when I get there!

I apprectiate everyone's opinions! I will try to not let the opinions of lazy, non-exercisers get to me! Obviously they have not tried to get back in shape. Actually, hearing their comments almost makes me want to prove them wrong that much more. Even my husband has told me not to get my hopes up. We Catheites have more drive though, don't we? Thank you, ladies, for all of your encouragement. I will keep you posted on new developments!
 
You're welcome. Definitely discuss it w/ your ob/gyn. I'm sure treatments may vary case to case. Some people can just take a baby aspirin to help. My blood clots pretty heavily (I had 2 miscarriages before I was finally diagnosed). Anyway, it doesn't cause me any problems other than pregnancy, childbirth, or surgery (you just need to let them know so they can be prepared). Again, let me know if you have any more questions. I've BTDT!

And you'll definitely prove them wrong. Do keep us posted!
 
One thing I want to say when I see this type of question(and yes it comes up from time to time) is that we all have doubts before we get pregnant. What will our bodies look like during and after, can we handle a baby, will all our freedom be gone, and on and on. This is very natural. I just feel that if you want something, you will get it, you will figure out how to achieve it. Sometimes it takes time, but we all have time.

You will get good advise, and you will get dumb advise. Just smile and do what you want to do, and know what you can achieve.

Good luck, and as to the worry about no epidural, I had no pain meds for either labor, and you survive, after all, you do Cathe, right?
 
Keep Cathe at the forefront of your goals. She is a true role model. If you were in shape before baby, you will probably be in shape after baby.

I have another roll model for you... check in at Joyce Vedrals website and look at her before and after group of people. One in particular is Mandy Lee. She has just had her 8th baby - she has had one set of twins among those... she's in better shape than I have ever been.
 
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