I am joking (hence the smileys) about calling everyone an attention hog! You can't see my face while I'm posting, so I use smileys.
Yes, wives used to be considered the property of their husbands. Today, with property laws changed, are inconsiderate, cruel people now less able to torment their spouses, chidren, etc?
Many "sexist" traditions are often based on truths about human nature, weaknesses on one side or another that are hard to accept. That doesn't mean they are right. But they are not necessarily wrong either. Are women better than men? It's a Catch-22. Just because our tradition uses husbands' and not wives' names doesn't mean it's evil. There are two sexes and we will always have to pick one for this sort of thing.
Along with women being "property" there were also deeper differences in societal expectations that are more subtle to us, but very real. If a man has cruelly taken advantage of his position of responsibility, our sense of justice should react against cruelty itself, not maleness. We all have the chance to unfairly use our liberties. Choosing a name accomplishes less than many people assume. All it really does is reveal personal information to strangers, and thus get attention where it was not necessarily wanted.
As long as my daughters (if I had any) are not ever expected to go into combat, I say, take the man's name.
Unless it's completely silly! Or Polish! I am kidding. Anyone who does not agree with me is a --
is a--
(help me here!)