Dating & text messaging

My 1st thought was HIGH MAINTENANCE Guys. I know some people love talking to their SO all day long, as if they can't go more than 1/2hr with out talking or they will go into withdrawl. I think some texting is fine (I don't have that feature either on my cell phone) to get a message out or to say "HI, I'm thinking about you" but once the guys saw you were not responding and you let them know you prefer actual talking then for them to behave the way they have means you've had a lucky escape.
 
I do not text and I don't believe in it. It takes years for me to type in a couple words- something that could have been said in seconds if I had called. The only value I see in texting is one - if you are in a place where you shouldn't speak aloud or if it was a quick note to deliver info that did not require a reply- but only if you are fluent at the operation. Like I said - still way way too long to stop and type in even that.

To date a guy??? Texting is not a legitimate way to get to know someone. 80 texts - my God I would felt like he was stalking me. I didn't want to hear from the person I was dating all day long. I don't want to hear from my own husband that often either.

One more thing I'd like to know - why is it so important to be completely reachable every single moment of the day??? How many of you had a cell phone growing up?? Did you manage alright? If you go to the movies, or are out to dinner - why can't people just live in that moment without notifying everyone of their every movement - like don't get me started on this Twitter thing. Now- it is so far beyond just communication.
 
Not a fan of texting at all. I'm so tired of going to movies and concerts and seeing the glow of cellphones in the audience. Can't people disconnect for two hours? What is so important that you can't sit through a movie without texting?

Don't even get me started on what texting is doing to the English language! The art of writing seems to be disappearing.

LauraMax, I have to believe that there are good men out there that can find better things to do with their thumbs!
 
Shoegal said:
I do not text and I don't believe in it. It takes years for me to type in a couple words- something that could have been said in seconds if I had called. The only value I see in texting is one - if you are in a place where you shouldn't speak aloud or if it was a quick note to deliver info that did not require a reply- but only if you are fluent at the operation. Like I said - still way way too long to stop and type in even that.

To date a guy??? Texting is not a legitimate way to get to know someone. 80 texts - my God I would felt like he was stalking me. I didn't want to hear from the person I was dating all day long. I don't want to hear from my own husband that often either.

One more thing I'd like to know - why is it so important to be completely reachable every single moment of the day??? How many of you had a cell phone growing up?? Did you manage alright? If you go to the movies, or are out to dinner - why can't people just live in that moment without notifying everyone of their every movement - like don't get me started on this Twitter thing. Now- it is so far beyond just communication.
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OMG! I could've written this myself! Just add in the cell use at the gym--do I really need to be on a recumbent bike the exact same time the guy next to me decides to make his weekly call to his MIL? :mad: UGH! Drives me batty! Not to mention cells should not be permitted in gyms at all, too many locker room pics have ended up on the internet. :eek:

Mine stays in the car almost all the time--esp. during social situations!

UFP! LMAO! I think I need IRL proof of that one. ;)
 
Poochy & Wendy - I think we need to start a Texter support group! Hi, I'm Amber and I Text (followed by gasps in the crowd). I hear what the rest of you gals are saying and I agree on pretty much all counts. I think you have to blame those using the technology though and not the technology itself. I love getting little notes from my friends from all across the country via my phone. I could never call all of them, but I'm able to drop little lines here and there (here and there being the key, not constantly). I'm also a lot like Poochy where I spend so much time on the phone during the day that the LAST thing I want to do in my free time is get back on the phone. I HATE talking on the phone. I don't care how much I love the person on the other end, it is still painful for me. So, texting, e-mail etc... gives me a way to check in with some of my buds that I wouldn't normally hear from. I think some etiquette needs to be followed though. I do not text in the presence of others except my DH (and only if we're just sitting around watching tv or something). My phone is on my person at all times, but I'm not going to answer a non-important call or run to check a text if I'm out with friends or on a "date" with DH. It's all about tact. An technology or not, you are always going to have people who have none!

And I still agree those guys are goobers for trying to "woo" someone via text. That's just silly.
 
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Not on the issue of relationhips -- Laura you are WAY more than a text.

But on the issue of texting I think it has become an obsession that is out of control. Last week in our community a woman (turns out she's a kindergarten teacher so many families know her) was walking her dog at about 8:00 p.m. When the dog returned but not the owner, the daughter went looking, only to find her mom lying in a ditch - she was lifeflighted in critical condition to a local hosp. Now the good news is that she is making a nice, and expected to be full recovery, though her students will be without her through the end of the year. But the really crappy news is that once the story aired, one of her neighbors came forward to say it may have been him who hit her with his car. He was too "busy texting" (his words) and thought he may have hit "something". I just don't get it - no, I'm not a texter.

You deserve more Laura - at least a call IMO.
 
Laura,

I have noticed this about the Eastern countries versus the West. People in the East are great adopters of texting while more people in the West tend to dislike it as a medium of communication.

There is a sensible way to text. Texting is great when you are not sure if the recipient is at work or in a meeting or exercising and you want to just say something (not have a two-way conversation). Example - Running late for our 12:00 pm lunch date, will be there by 12:15.

I like getting texts like this when I am at work because it is not intrusive. I dont have to interrupt a meeting to respond, I can send an acknowledgement when I have a chance to see my text messages.

I prefer text messages to voice mail because it takes much less time to read a text than listen to voice mail and it is faster to respond too. More time efficient.

Most people instinctively figure out when texting is more efficient than calling. It takes effort/time to type back and forth so you need to consider what it will take for the recipient to respond too.

It is a great way to stay in touch because on the right plan it actually costs less than talking. So if I am in another country sending an occasional text to friends and family back home is nice since the alternative is to wait until I can get on email or back home.

I dont "get" texting as an alternative to a conversation either. Dont understand why people choose to text back and forth instead of talking when they want to chat. If something needs more than 3 texts (counting both directions) it deserves a conversation in my book.

I completely dont get bombardment by text messages. Deluging someone with texts - why would anyone do that? It would drive me nuts to have a long term relationship with someone who communicates this way and I am a BIG user of text messaging.
 
Fidget Queen said:
I would feel exactly as you do, Laura. I think texting is a way for people to keep somebody brand new strung along without putting in the effort of an actual connection. It is a big red flag that these people aren't interested enough to talk for 15 minutes. When I'm interested in somebody, I CAN'T WAIT to hear their voice on the phone, or see them in person, or whatever. If they don't want to, especially when you are adamantly against the texting, then it's a pretty clear indicator of where they stand. A few texts here and there are fine and harmless, even though I don't partake in them myself :).

I mean, truly, I hate talking on the phone, too, but for the people that are important to me, I do it; I make the time. I do not text. At all. My SO does not either. And I want to punch in the face all the people I try to have a conversation with who do nothing but sit and text other people. How in the world is this ok??? These dudes that you met would probably be doing that all of the time, as well, if texting is such a huge part of their lives.

Good riddance. It's just a shiny and new way for rude men to express their rudeness and they have no business dating a real woman.
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AND AMEN TO THAT!! Couldn't have said it better myself!!


Good God Laura! Wooing by texting!? Are you kidding me!!:eek: It's a good thing you weeded them out that way! You really wouldn't want to have a relationship with these immature wackadoos!! If a guy did that to me as his way of "getting to know me" I'd do exactly the same thing. Any mature man worth his salt who really likes you and wants to get to know you and connect with you will WANT to call you. I've come to the realization that when guys do that it's there way of stringing you along whilst keeping you at arms length. These are unavailable guys that aren't interested in a real relationship and getting to know and maybe even love you. And I realize it's best to weed them out right away then later. It's there loss, the FOOLS!! These are not men, and as Fidget Queen said they have NO business dating a REAL woman!!

I once had a guy ask me out for dinner than give me his business card for me to call him, so I then give him my number and asked him to call me to firm it up. This is where I landed in a Woody Allen movie— he then proceeded to tell me he doesn't call women!!:eek: Well, needless to say we never went out for that dinner. I also, had the same experience like you had but with e-mails a number of years back. This guy from church had my number but instead wanted to converse with me by e-mails and I finally told him that for me it's so much easier and faster to talk than trying to find the words by e-mail. Well that was the end of our romance!! He stopped e-mailing me and never called. Go figure!! He obviously wasn't for real.

We girls gotta stick together on this and not compromise. We deserve to be treated preciously. Eventually we WILL meet the real deal!!;)
 
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I must say that I do appreciate texters when I am on the Metro North train and they save me from having to listen to them blathering as loud as they can on their phones.
 
Beavs said:
I must say that I do appreciate texters when I am on the Metro North train and they save me from having to listen to them blathering as loud as they can on their phones.
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werd! They sure make SEPTA better than the loud mouths!
 
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