So much negativity!

jcm

jcm

Cathlete
Well, I just spent some time on a different fitness forum out of curiousity. Wow do people have unpleasant things to say! I've just always figured if I don't like something for whatever reason I steer clear of it. Everyone is entitled to their opinion but over the internet people can be so negative and nasty! It always shocks me too when I read comments on Youtube or Amazon about videos/songs or whatever the horrible things that are said. And it's almost just for the sake of being mean. There's always helpful criticism that can be shared but some of what I've read out there scares me for my children! It reminds me of how these kids are being cyber-bullied. The few times I've looked into this stuff - reading comments that turn so ugly - it has such a negative impact on my own thoughts! Ugggggh. The internet is great but it has certainly given lots of people the faceless freedom to say horrible things. I miss the old days - and I'm only 38!

Jen
 
Yeah, the good ol' days when everyone had an opinion just like mine. I lived in Russia at the time, I believe Stalin was in charge...

It is a different time, that's for sure. We've taken the concept of "anonymous" comment to a whole new level, where people feel free to say what they really think, yet can still be destroyed by a single, well-placed comment. How we live and interact today is so different from even 10 years ago. We are confronted every day by the human capacity for nastiness- and I am a star at that. If I'm in a bad mood, look out! I'll take you down and feel justified doing it, just because I think I'm "right". Traditional morals seem antiquated, while ethics are growing by leaps and bounds.

I wonder what it'll be like ten years from now, when all of these new means of social contact are a little bit more solidified. We are living in one of those times in history where things change every ten minutes. The historians are going to have a field day with us.
 
I know what you are talking about...I don't get it. If you aren't interested in something, just don't buy it, why do they have to bash it?? I was lurking as well, and just got tired of reading it.

BTW, I am 38 too...and another Jenn!!
 
I hate that people feel they have a right to be mean just because they are hiding behind a keyboard. You can give your opinion (even a negative one). You have a right to BUT there is a right and a wrong way to do it. I try to treat people the same way over the internet as I would in real life which brings me to my next point. Perhaps these folks are not "hiding" behind their keyboard at all! Perhaps they are just tactless, nasty people to begin with. Just a thought!
 
Remember the actual telephone and "snail mail"? I remember writing letters and having the brains to hold off mailing and and changing my mind later! I'm still guilty of occasionally shooting things off then wishing I hadn't but wow - some stuff out there is really deliberate. I remember reading some comment on Youtube along the lines of "I can't wait until they die from HIV." What's that???
 
The good news is that some states are taking notice that the bullying is hurtful and laws of accountability are being set into place.

People are definitely less mean when they have to face their 'prey'.
 
jcm said:
Remember the actual telephone and "snail mail"? I remember writing letters and having the brains to hold off mailing and and changing my mind later! I'm still guilty of occasionally shooting things off then wishing I hadn't but wow - some stuff out there is really deliberate. I remember reading some comment on Youtube along the lines of "I can't wait until they die from HIV." What's that???
Click to expand...

Yeah, thank god for the "edit" button.
 
jcm said:
Well, I just spent some time on a different fitness forum out of curiousity. Wow do people have unpleasant things to say! I've just always figured if I don't like something for whatever reason I steer clear of it. Everyone is entitled to their opinion but over the internet people can be so negative and nasty! It always shocks me too when I read comments on Youtube or Amazon about videos/songs or whatever the horrible things that are said. And it's almost just for the sake of being mean. There's always helpful criticism that can be shared but some of what I've read out there scares me for my children! It reminds me of how these kids are being cyber-bullied. The few times I've looked into this stuff - reading comments that turn so ugly - it has such a negative impact on my own thoughts! Ugggggh. The internet is great but it has certainly given lots of people the faceless freedom to say horrible things. I miss the old days - and I'm only 38!

Jen
Click to expand...

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that people on message boards are anonymous so people feel they can say what they want with no repercussions...and for the most part that is true. It is frightening what people will do if they won't be held responsible for their actions.

A few years ago, around 2001 I think, I saw the scariest thing on the Discovery Channel. It was a show about adult entertainment and whether or not it was harmful for society. Now before seeing this I would have said, 'Hey, as long as you are an adult, and don't break any laws, you can choose for yourself if this kind of stuff is for you.' After watching this show it totally changed my tune. They had 100 men watch adult movies then asked them if they felt "agressive" and would commit rape IF they knew they wouldn't get caught. Something like 63% said they would commit this act IF they knew they wouldn't get caught. Of that 63% they asked how many of them would (after watching an adult film) would commit rape IF they knew they wouldn't get caught even if they had a willing partner. Something like 16% (I remember it was in the upper teens) of the 63 men said that after watching this kind of stuff they would prefer to rape someone than be with a willing partner if they knew they wouldn't get caught. This floored me! It changed my thinking that maybe as a society we simply aren't mature enough for this kind of stuff. While I would never blame a film for someone's actions...to me that is just too high of a percentage to ignore.

So it doesn't surprise me at all how rude people get on message boards, after all, they aren't going to get caught or held responsible for their actions.
 
I try to be positive and nice to people. Sometimes I have a bad day. I try to keep that in mind for other people and give them the benefit of the doubt. Some people ARE negative. They're best ignored. Then there's the issue of groupthink. Groupthink accounts for a large number of negative opinions. It amazes me how many people cannot think critically or think for themselves.
 
What scares me the most is that I've heard children behave just as badly. I will never forget the day I saw a 5 year old yell at their grandmother "Stop it stupid!!!" and at the same time he smacked her hand. She was trying to wipe off a smudge of chocolate off of his face. The grandmother just took the comment said nothing and sat back down. She must have been 70 years old. It broke my heart.
 
janie1234 said:
What scares me the most is that I've heard children behave just as badly. I will never forget the day I saw a 5 year old yell at their grandmother "Stop it stupid!!!" and at the same time he smacked her hand. She was trying to wipe off a smudge of chocolate off of his face. The grandmother just took the comment said nothing and sat back down. She must have been 70 years old. It broke my heart.
Click to expand...

That's very sad. What sort of lesson did that child learn--that he can do as he pleases and say whatever he wants with no consequences?

We had a client who screamed, yelled and raised holy you-know-what with one of our staff on the telephone. When she went to the client's office and spoke to him face to face the next day, sugar wouldn't melt in his mouth he was so sweet to her. It's normally a lot harder to be negative and mean to someone's face, but that child mentioned in Janie's story probably is learning that it isn't hard at all. :(
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Our Newsletter

Get awesome content delivered straight to your inbox.

Top