If you and your spouse have the same name

and you receive a letter from a lawyer, how do you prefer to be addressed?

  • Mr. and Mrs. Richard Ricardo

    Votes: 45 46.9%

  • Mr. and Ms. Richard Ricardo

    Votes: 1 1.0%

  • Mr. Richard Ricardo and Mrs. Lucy Ricardo

    Votes: 2 2.1%

  • Mr. Richard Ricardo and Ms. Lucy Ricardo

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Mr. Richard and Mrs. Lucy Ricardo

    Votes: 4 4.2%

  • Mr. Richard and Ms. Lucy Ricardo

    Votes: 3 3.1%

  • Richard and Lucy Ricardo

    Votes: 28 29.2%

  • Richard Ricardo and Lucy Ricardo

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Other

    Votes: 13 13.5%
  • Total voters
    96
I am a dinasour then LOL!! I loathe being addressed as Ms. "Ricky Ricardo" or Mr & Mrs "Ricky Ricardo" I have no insecurity in my identity, but I just can not stand this. It drives me crazy. Guess I am in the minority :eek:
 
Disclaimer: Apologies to Lucy for not using "Lucille". Obviously, it must be either Richard and Lucille or Ricky and Lucy. My bad but I can't change the poll.
 
This is one of those things I don't tend to get in a twist about. If someone writes Mr and Mrs Fitzwilliam Darcy it doesn't bother me. When I send letters though I tend to just do Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth Darcy.

Sparrow
 
sparrow13 said:
This is one of those things I don't tend to get in a twist about. If someone writes Mr and Mrs Fitzwilliam Darcy it doesn't bother me. When I send letters though I tend to just do Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth Darcy.

Sparrow
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I think that one would be:
Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy and Ms. Elizabeth Bennett
But don't mind me. She's my hero.
 
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I prefer it if people just write our first and last names, like in Lucy and Richard Ricardo.

That is how I address my mailings to clients or potential clients. In fact, as a closet feminist I usually put the woman's name first :p

It may be different for a lawyer though. But me personally, it annoys me if I get a letter addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Rickard Ricardo. My name is NOT Richard for crying out loud.
 
maddiesmum said:
Any mail that came to me addressed as Mr and Mrs Richard Ricardo would be sent straight back unopened. I cannot believe that in today's age of equality (supposedly) any professional body would do a woman the discourtesy of making her no more than an appendage to her husband, to the extent that she no longer has her own first name.

My "other" vote would be "Lucy and Richard Ricardo." Why the hell should he be first? Do you know for sure that he is the one taking care of all matters financial, legal and administrative in the family? In our house, that would not be the case. Most of the accounts in this family are held in my name and as such, I expect all mail concerning those accounts to address me first.

I'd do my research before addressing anything to anyone.

Clare
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ITA! I had an identity before I got married. Just because I was traditional enough to take my husband's last name, doesn't mean I have lost my first name as well! I guess I am a feminist? *shudders*

Carrie
 
I dont mind any of the options. As long as the name and address are error-free enough for the mail to reach me. :)
 
fit_fairy said:
That is exactly how I feel!! And it bothers me even more when it's from my MIL :rolleyes:
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Agreed!! I'm totally secure in who I am and that's why I expect to be addressed as me. I also don't buy the whole two people become one crap at wedding ceremonies.
 
fit_fairy said:
I am a dinasour then LOL!! I loathe being addressed as Ms. "Ricky Ricardo" or Mr & Mrs "Ricky Ricardo" I have no insecurity in my identity, but I just can not stand this. It drives me crazy. Guess I am in the minority :eek:
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Me too! I can't stand being addressed like this and my mom sometimes addresses cards to me this way. WTH?

DH and I are both PhDs but we don't have people address us as Dr because that's lame. However, some people do choose to do this. We got a letter addressed to

Dr. and Mrs. DH first name DH last night

I was not not happy! I mean if you are recognizing he's a Dr then recognize that I'm a Dr too.
 
hmmm.. makes you wonder what you do when the WOMAN is the Dr. and the MAN is not... would that be Mr. & Dr. Richard Ricardo?

and how would you actually do Berry99's double Dr? Dr. and Dr. Richard Ricardo...

guess I will never be one, so will never have to worry about it... but have wondered. I personally HATE the Ms. Dani... and as I am newely married, I'm still getting used to my new last name, nevermine being Mrs. Leslie! LOL.. Shhhh dont tell DH that!
 
It has never mattered one way or the other to me!

I will add that what bothers me most is when we get things addressed to Mr. and Mrs., when it should be Dr. and Mrs.
 
Beavs said:
I also don't buy the whole two people become one crap at wedding ceremonies.
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I may look at the two people become one different than you. My husband and I make our life's decisions behind closed doors. Our life together is ours and no one (parents, friends, family) are invited to share in our private decisions. To outsiders we are united as one. We argue and disagree, but we do not invite outsiders into our relationship decisions or our arguments.
This is how our marriage has survived happily for 27 years.
 
fit44 said:
I may look at the two people become one different than you. My husband and I make our life's decisions behind closed doors. Our life together is ours and no one (parents, friends, family) are invited to share in our private decisions. To outsiders we are united as one. We argue and disagree, but we do not invite outsiders into our relationship decisions or our arguments.
This is how our marriage has survived happily for 27 years.
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I'm speaking in terms of identity....in terms of the implication to some that people are just not complete until they are married.
 
Beavs said:
I'm speaking in terms of identity....in terms of the implication to some that people are just not complete until they are married.
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Oh, I thought you meant what the priest or pastor says during the wedding ceremony.
I know my brother never got it. He and his wife include everyone in their marital problems. They can't seem to come together on anything.:eek:
 
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