HELP! I Don't Want To Gain My Weight Back!

KC5689

Cathlete
OK, the title sounds very dramatic I know, but, I'm in need of help/suggestions/advice. I lost 30+ lbs. over the course of 6-7 months. However, I've been trying to loose these last 10 lbs. for about 2-3 months and haven't been able to. I've lost about 4-6lbs but it goes and comes back. It's not that it's an unrealistic weight for me either because the problem is that I overeat too often.

I should have started by saying that I'm an emotional eater and as of now am in a relationship that brings much stress(contemplating ending it)and am trying to change careers. I am trying really hard not to gain back the weight but fear that I will. I sometimes go on food binges on the weekends (more often lately).

For those of you who are emotional eaters what helps you? I recently bought this hypnosis CD about weight loss but have only listened to it once. I've read all of the books that tell you how to diminish EE but sometimes(a lot of the time) I don't use those strategies.
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
KC
 
I hear ya!! I guess the only thing that helped me was sheer willpower, and it wasn't/isn't easy. When I eat something "bad" for me, I feel bad then bc I feel bad and already ate some, might as well eat the rest, bc the damage is done, right? The more I sat and thought about it, the less sense it made. So I just stopped. Not to say I still don't eat "bad" things. I just finished a 100 cal Hershey bar, but not bc I was upset or mad or whatever, but bc I wanted some chocolate. I ate good the rest of the day, so it wasn't going to break the calorie or nutrition bank, so I ate it. I just grew tired of eating to eat and not really tasting or enjoying what I was eating. So now if I'm sad/mad/upset whatever, I go exercise, take a walk, read a book, do a cross stitch, stay out of the kitchen!!! Its tough, but I just had to say to myself, this is nonsense and has to stop!!! It was making feel worse not better, and compounding the prob. So I stopped. I do slip occasionally, but for the most part I've got it under control. Fortunely, right now my biggest stressor in life is work. I take my lunch and 2 snacks w/ me to work and when its gone, its gone. I don't eat the munchies off the table, which are very tough to avoid. So I drink lots of water and chew on the end of my pen. Nasty habit, I know, and not good for my teeth either. But keeps me out of the munchies and keeps other people from walking off with my pens!!! So, all I can say is will power and determination. And I know its not easy, hang in there!!!!

Nan
 
I'm having the same issue. I recently lost 50 lbs and hit a very long plateau that I'm really frustrated with. Now the weight has started to inch upwards and I need motivation and willpower to keep going.

I keep fruits and veggies at my desk at work to keep from snacking on bad stuff when I'm stressed.
 
I'm in the same boat except that I DID gain the 13lbs back that I had lost over last summer. During winter I started bingeing badly again (I had been in remission, so to speak). I am so frustrated. The weight gain is making my workouts even harder. The only thing I can suggest is not to buy anything that you may binge on. This can be difficult unless you live alone. Also, try using pen and paper to log your food (not an online calorie tracker). This helps as long as I do it faithfully but then I eventually slack off.

Marina
 
Here is my 13 cents (my favorite number):

Some suggestions:
1. Plan ahead. Pack snacks, breakfast, lunch, etc. the night before. Plan what you are going to eat for the week before you go to the grocery store. Keep healthy snack foods available.
2. Keep a food journal. Be aware of what you eat and be mindful.
3. Throw out all trigger foods.
4. Find a weight loss buddy.
5. Forgive yourself if you make a bad choice and move on.
6. Read labels
7. Eat reasonable portions with limited frequency of foods that you know you should limit. If you cannot control yourself, avoid them for awhile, figure out what you like most about them, and see if you can find a substitute.
8. Focus on the progress you make. Reward yourself with something that has nothing to do with food.
9. Move more.
10. Get enough sleep
11. If you are starving before you go out to eat, have a small snack (fruit, low fat cheese, a few crackers...etc) so that you will be able to make good choices.
12. Drink alot of water
13. Never give up.

Rhonda
 
Thanks ladies for your advice,suggestions and support. It's crazy to say that all of the suggestions you made I know but seem to forget when I'm in the eye of the storm. But you're right, it's a lot easier for me when I plan my meals and bring extra fruit and veges. I like the idea of eating what I've packed until it's gone and after that waiting until I get home to eat. I've tried the food journal but can't stick with it. I'm not a writer but I do like verbally expressing myself. Maybe I'll get on of those voice recorders and talk about my day and feelings each night as I'm sure my boyfriend gets tired of hearing my endless talk about food. I think I too have to just say enough is enough with the binge eating and practice more willpower. Thanks. With me luck.
 
This site is so good for support. Use it and keep reading for tips and encouragement. We are all smart people and know what we should be doing, but get discouraged when we are spinning our wheels despite our efforts. Who wants to do killer workouts and not see results, right?

I've finally gotten through my plateau by doing the following:

1) Bought Cathe workout calendar to log workouts and days off. I also write down on 1st of month my weight/measurements. (I weigh myself a few times during month but only the 1st of the month COUNTS!

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2) I eat pretty good, small portions all day long and use a smaller wine glass...

I have found that cutting down my intake just a little, and trying to go longer/harder/heavier just a little or as much as I can handle on my workouts has had a great results for me!It's great because I haven't sacrificed much on eating or exercising.

PS - you must exercise consistent. Helps me greatly mentally too!:7
 
I'm a big-time emotional eater as well. I used to always gain weight when I started a new relationship (or one ended). The main thing that has helped me, and this may sound strange, has been doing OA meetings. I do two phone meetings a week and go to one live meeting. Here is the website in case anyone is interested: www.oa.org

Here is the number to the two phone meetings (they have more, but I like these two the best):

Tues @ 8pm e:641-297-5400, or 641-297-5410: the pin is 59002# or 55001#, the contact for this meeting is Norma 602-380-6208 PST

Thur @ 8pm eastern:319-279-1000: the pin is 135103# or 55002; the contact for this meeting is Marilyn 610-525-3397 EST

:D
 
I know you've gotten a lot of of feedback already, and probably don't need/want anymore, but I just wanted to let you know that the food journal really does work. I take a blank journal and at the top write the date and my weight for the day. Then I write on each line like this:
Breakfast:
Lunch:
Snack:
Dinner:
Dessert:
Water:

I list what I eat and tally my water for the day (drink no less than 8 glasses). I also have upped my fiber intake. That REALLY curbs my appetite, and I eat one of those chocolate calcium chews three times a day after meals. For some reason, those take away my appetite. For dessert each night, I eat angel food cake with LOTS of strawberries and blackberries on top, sprinkled with Splenda. This adds to your fiber intake too. It's really worked for me. Try to not dip below 1200 calories for the day, this will slow down your metabolism, or so I've heard.

Also, sometimes, when you think you're hungry, it's actually dehydration masking itself as hunger. Try drinking a tall glass of water or diet iced tea, and you'd be amazed at how it will take that hunger away.

Just a few suggestions to add to the many you've already gotten. Good luck!
 
I, too, am in the same boat. I've struggled with dieting and weight issues most of my life. I'm seeing a nutrionist who specializes in nutrition therapy. At my last appointment, we discovered that I am constantly in the diet mentality, which she truly believes is keeping me from being at my ideal weight. My weight has yo-yo'd for years and we're now going to try to break me free of that.

She feels that my low self-esteem is getting in the way, too. I try to value my body by exercising 5 days a week, which is backwards. I need to value and love my body first, then exercise to continue to take care of it.

There are two books she highly recommends: Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch and also Eating in the Light of the Moon by Anita Johnston. I read the first one months ago and it makes sense, however, the second book, is fabulous. The author talks about disordered eating in a way that makes total sense. Here's her website: http://dranitajohnston.com

My last appointment with the nutritionist has been almost 3 weeks and my homework has been to: not get on the scale, not do any food journaling and to write down on a piece paper every time I call myself fat or have a negative thought about me. This has been the hardest three weeks ever - I fear I will gain more weight by not food journaling and counting calories, but that's the diet mentality and allowing food to continue to control me.

It's a process that will probably take me a while to go through, but it hasn't been too bad. Every meal I remind myself that I can eat again in a few hours if I want to, therefore, naturally, my portions have been smaller. (not sure if this is the diet mentality, but it sure helps). I also realize the more I restrict certain foods, especially chocolate, the more I crave it.

I wish you lots of luck; feel free to email me if you'd like to talk more.

Christine
 
Hi all,

Wow, Christine, this sounds like an excellent way of taking control of your eating.

I believe I react to stress by overeating, as well. I'm a substitute teacher and when I get home from a rough day at 3:20, I used to start binging. In trying to stop that deadly habit, I've developed a new one: I make a cup of tea when I get home and sit down at the computer and just take 15 minutes to unwind. When I'm finished I deal with the kid's backpacks, the mail; and then I workout from about 4-5. Once I gave myself permission to just relax for a bit and not try to cleann up everything right away I felt better and stopped binging.

Beth
 
I eat in response to stress - an argument with MDH, a bad day at work, so I'd call myself an emotional eater. The biggest thing that has helped me, goes like this: let's say I am feeling nervous/sad/upset/angry about an interaction with someone at work. I come home and feel like grabbing a bag of chocolate chip cookies and eating them all, as well as ice cream, chips, whatever is available.

So, two strategies, first don't buy the bags of cookies etc., like someone else said. [I still eat a cookie occasionally but I'll go someplace where I can buy only one]

But the main thing for me is I stop and ask myself, "If you eat this cookie, or binge on the whole bag, will it solve the problem that made you upset? Will it help you in any way?" The answer is always no, because eating never solves any problem.

Also I would recommend reading "Diets Don't Work" by Bob Schwartz. It's fantastic on this subject and a lot of others.

~ Ann ~
Aim for nothing, and you'll hit it every time!
 
Hi Ladies,
Thank you for the feedback. There was a lot of good suggestions that I plan to incorporate. I have been doing a bit better with the eating but I guess it will be a challenge no matter what. Knowing that there are others out there that deal with emotional eating but still manage to maintain some form of fitness regimen makes me feel better. I would often wonder why I can manage to stick with working out but have such a hard time eating healthy.
Kacey
 
I began seriously working out to dvds (mostly The FIRM) at home last August. I never had much in the way of hand-eye coordination and had so much trouble learning TheFIRM that, upon viewing a Cathe cardio workout on FitTV, I nearly cried. All I could think was 'And I thought TheFirm was hard! I could NEVER get Her footwork down.' But I started catching bits of Cathe's FitTV workouts and was so intrigued by how challenging it all looked. I bought her beginners set (the step, weights, band, and dvds sold at Target in the big box) and even felt intimidated by the "easy" step aerobics in the set(!). So, I kept doing The Firm... Month's went by and the needle on the scale barely budged, even though I was working out like a demon - and The Firm's tall box climbs (with which I'm sure many people here are familiar) were killing the knees on my already obese/overburdened body... About the time I started having real issues and becoming irritated with my (perceived) lack of results I stumbled onto Bob Greene's Best Life Diet book (Oprah's diet "guru") and I just can't say enough about it. I even bought copies for several co-workers. Within several weeks of half-heartedly following Phase I of his simple, safe, logical plan I was stunned at the big bump down in the numbers on the scale. After that, the weight just started melting off - yet I STILL wasn't following the plan to the letter. Within three months I had to buy smaller clothes... I also found out all those FIRM workouts that killed me but didn't seem to be getting results actually had. I had lots of shapely muscles I just wasn't able to see them buried under all the now-dissolved fat. But Bob Greene was key. His book addresses the SCIENCE behind why people aren't able to lose weight (emotional issues are one reason), why plateau's happen and how to move past them. Phase I doesn't even tell you what you can't eat. The first section is mostly concerned with exercise and getting you on a "feeding schedule." It's about simple changes you can make to the WAY you eat that can net huge results. In fact, he states that many of his clients have such spectacular results in Phase I that they never continue to Phase II. You can stay or move on, your choice. When I read that I wouldn't be allowed to eat at all 2-3 hours before bedtime I thought I couldn't do it but he spells out what you should be getting in your diet each day that will, in effect, curb your hunger, making it easy to adhere to a cutoff time. It's not hard and it works! The cutoff time is the #1 reason (on top of all the exercise I was already doing) I was able to buy 4 pairs of jeans in size 14 yesterday (in different brands - so I know I really am a 14 - that's down from size 24, since last August!). If you read a lot fitness magazines, books, and editorials there's actually not much that's new in Greene's book. However, his gift is in his ability to pull all the information together and make it coherent and accessible for everyone. It's just so thorough, truthful and simple that I believe everyone who wants to go from fat to fit ought to read it. I'm 5'5" and in August of 2006 I weighed 220lbs. I weigh myself only once a month because that's The Plan (Greene explains why scales are dangerously addictive). Not a day goes by when I'm not asked by at least three people how I did it. If this keeps up I'm going to have to print up cards with Greene's name and the title of his book so I can hand those out instead of having to keep writing it down. I struggled with food addiction for years but not anymore. Between Greene's book and all the exercise I've radically transformed myself, after 15 years as a Fat Girl, asleep at the wheel. If I can conquer emotional eating ANYONE can. And I'm still only on Phase I of Greene's plan.

About exercise. I AM at least able to do Cathe's Low Max now (a big deal for me) and am about ready to move up to tougher stuff. I was just in a car accident on 5/25 (car totalled, should have died, but walked away with nothing more than some glass in my left arm and a severed tendon in my left hand, the repair/recovery of which has left me temporarily unable to hold dumbells) and it will be awhile before I can get back to weight training. But I'm so grateful to God for watching over me and so glad to be alive... I can't wait to heal-up, get a barbell set and lift serious weight with Cathe. But I've now become a BIG believer in variety. Do lots of Cathe... but do other things... The Firm, TaeBo, Pilates... walk, run, cycle... kayak, skydive, iceskate, ski... More variety = more fun, less dread and boredom, and acts as insurance against the overuse injuries you get from doing too many of the same moves over-and-over again on a day-to-day basis.

I am the word's worst editor and I do go on, for which I apologize. The experieces I've encountered as a result of my ongoing physical transformation, the accident, and all the time have off work (time to contemplate It All) have, perhaps invested me with a missionary's zeal but that's not really a bad thing. I've awakened from 15 years of a zombie-like life, about nothing more than work, followed by bonbons & TV on the sofa, then bed... alone. Fifteen years... wasted. I'm 46 now and I'm guessing you're a lot younger. Whether or not that's true my story should serve as a cautionary tale, regardless. I've got it together now (I never really wanted to be a mom but if I had, can you just imagine?) Even so, I could just kick myself for all the lost (postponed?) opportnities: All the travelling I should have already done, all the fun I should have had, all the men I should have known... Don't do as I have done or you will regret it. I don't want that for you or anyone. There's too much cool stuff to do - and too many cool people to do it with. KC, you have had great success and deserve so much credit BUT you need to decide if you want a Big Life or more of the same tired stuff. YOU need to take YOURSELF off auto pilot and commit to changing your life from the inside out and NEVER turning back. I shared my story (thus far) to try and inspire you to continue to become a better, healthiier, happier YOU and to encourage you to trust yourself to rid your life of dead weight, of negative forces. But the fact is this: It's all up to you. You need to decide how you want to live the rest of your life -STARTING NOW. Eating bits of junk from time to time isn't going to tank your progress (utter deprivation is the road to ruin) but if you're eating ever-increasing big servings... that needs to stop now. Read Bob Greene's book (all the libraries have it and it should come out in paperback soon) so you can learn why you sabotage your own success - BEFORE you undo all your hard work. After I lost that first ten pounds I told a co-worker I FELT so much better... lighter. She said "Well, yea. You're not carrying around a 10-pound bowling ball any more." Nice visual. Here's another: One night I was standing at the kitchen sink, staring at the TV screen, eating ice cream directly from the BIG container when it occured to me that with every excess bite it was as if I were wrapping myself in another row of barrbed wire, trapping my own self more and more in a body I did not want and a life I did not want. Being wrapped in barbed wire when all you really wat to do is fly. It's self-induced prison. So stop backsliding and go after the fabulous life you REALLY want. Henry David Thoreau said "live deliberately." Amen. You, me, we ALL need to stop being unwelcome guests in our own lives. Live deliberately. Your life awaits!
 
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I feel so moved.

You should post in the sucess stories part of the forum.

Best Wishes,

Rhonda
 
Wow. Sirensongwoman, your words are so profound. It's so ironic because I too began to see results and lost almost all of my weight after reading Bob Greene's book. It seemed to happened so easy and like you, I didn't follow it to the letter. What really worked for me was the hunger scale and cutting off eating 2 hrs. before bed. I can't really say how I handled emotional eating, but I rarely did. It still amazes because during the time I was going through so many issues with my fiance. But, I quess I was so focused on loosing that I didn't let those problems get in my way. Unfortunately, I can't say the same now. I'm out of control sometimes and it's very depressing.
What's also ironic is just this morning I woke up and toke Bob Greene's book out prepared to reread it over the next few days. I figured since it helped me loose before, I should go back to it(especially with the Hunger Scale).

Thank you for the words of incouragement. You are dead on with needing to rid one's self of dead weight or negative forces as I need to do both literally and figuratively:) . I'm 33, no children (still undecided if I want any), and have never been married (but have been in a 11 yr relationship that needs to end). At this point I'm trying to find the courage and strength, but I really believe that I'm on my way. Your story inspires me to push pass my fear live a better life. Thank you.
 
If you can stand a couple more book recommendations I'll add mine to the list.

As a lifelong emotional eater I have struggled with how to deal with the fear of using something besides food to find comfort. What else is so pleasurable, so undemanding, so reliable?

Not too long ago my sister sent me a couple of books. She wanted me to help her with her own diet plan.

The first was The Beck Diet Solution by Judith Beck. This is very gentle and very freeing. There are ideas from this one I use every day.

The second one is The Four Day Win by Martha Beck. I don't think the two women are related. I found out when I was almost done with 4 Day that this author also wrote Expecting Adam - a memoir about her experience as the mother of a child with Down Syndrome. She is, hands down, the most wickedly funny, sharp, and sympathetic author I have read. And that's saying something since I read constantly! She has a line that I'll paraphrase about how we lie to ourselves about our diets and how we try to live with something she calls "famine brain".

"Oh my diet of celery sticks and bingo cards is very satisfying!"

Love her.

So, best wishes and best of luck to you. If you are able to end your difficult relationship, you may find that taking care of yourself might become a habit.

S
 
Best website, books, program forums, etc... for eating issues I've ever found and worked with in my life is www.radiantrecovery.com.

Been using this since 98 and have lost a lot of weight and gained so much more in health and emotional stability.

Hope this helps. :+

Edith
 

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