Bridesmaids Dresses

Timber99

Timber99

Cathlete
Weigh in for me please! Are bridesmaids dresses the bride's choice or a group decision amongst the bridesmaids?

Where I'm from, the bride picks the dresses and the girls go get measured. She can take one or more or all of the bridesmaids to look but there is no requirement of that. It isn't a matter of everyone approving or everyone getting together and making sure they are all happy. It's not a democratic vote.

But I've been made to feel otherwise and now I wonder if I am being a witch.

Yes, I'm having an issue... :)
 
I took a few bridesmaids dress shopping with me and took their input into my decision making process but I had final say over the dress choice. I kept price in mind, since I figure that would be a valid reason to not be happy with a dress choice. If they weren't happy they never told me, bless them. :) I'm sorry you're having conflict- weddings can be famous for that. Just hang in there, listen to their input and calmly explain why you want what you want. I hope they all come around for you without any attitude.
 
People do different things. My BF that just got married at the end of September picked her dress. I am happy to oblige since she did the same for me. As long as the dress isn't a bazillion dollars or has a huge honking bow on the ass.
 
It is the BRIDE'S decision. If you are nice and want some input that's great, but it's your decision and unless you pick something that is just astronomical in price, the bridesmaids can deal with it. ;) This is YOUR day. Keep telling yourself that because everyone including the mother n' laws, bridesmaids, relatives, etc... will try to convince you otherwise throughout the entire process (not intentionally, but it happens).
 
It should be the bride's decision. While it's nice to listen to your bridesmaids' concerns and try to accomodate as best you can, it's ultimately up to YOU what they will wear in YOUR wedding. Don't let them make you feel guilty about that. Good luck! :)
 
you are not a witch. it's YOUR once-in-a-lifetime event and YOU get all the say.

enjoy your special day!!!
 
The wedding I was in, all of the bridesmaids went and we all agreed on what we wanted to wear. All we had to do was stay with the color that the bride wanted. It's your wedding, I say do what you want.
 
I am newly married, although my wedding feels like AGES ago. And I had no attendants, so I can't really give advice there. I just know that even with my SMALL and INTIMATE wedding, lots of people really loved to voice their opinion on what THEY thought OUR day should be like. But please do what makes you happy -- whether it's keeping the peace by letting them pick their dress, or telling them you have picked one out for them!
 
I'd say it's the bride's choice. I talked to my bridesmaids beforehand and agreed on a maximum price that everyone was comfortable with. Actually, my mom and I ended up picking out the dresses and no one complained to me about them, though who knows if anyone really liked them or not.

Of the weddings that I have been in the only time I have complained was when a bride wanted us to wear $250 dresses. It turns out that others complained about the price too so the bride found another dress that was way cheaper. I may be cheap, but $250 is a lot of money plus all the money that I had to shell out for plane tickets and hotels, alterations, showers, and gifts, etc...
 
The only requirement I gave my two bridesmaids was that the dress was to be black. I told them to decide if they wanted the same dress or different ones and that I preferred street-length to long, but it was totally up to them. They looked great, and they loved me for it. (And they both got plenty of use out of them.)

Here they are (my flower girl wore black, too.):

http://pic80.picturetrail.com/VOL2128/9687205/17589773/273854041.jpg
 
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You are not a witch, it is the bride's decision although it is nice to ask if there is anything they would be uncomfortable wearing (e.g. one of DD's bridesmaids was pretty large chested and requested that the dress not be strapless).

Good Luck!
 
If you like the women who will be your bridesmaids, I don't think this should be an either/or.

The compromise I like was recently demonstrated during Kitty's wedding on Brothers & Sisters. I think it is politic to chose a colour that suits both/all bridesmaids. Once a colour has been chosen, everyone will be happier and the whole affair will look better-dressed if the bridesmaids' dresses are selected to suit their figure/size/shape and sense of personal style. So, an empire style in lilac (for example) might suit one friend, but another might need and prefer a strapless style, whilst another might go for a surplice bodice with A-line: all in lilac.

I would not impose my choice of colour and style upon anyone. The bridesmaids need to be comfortable too. Even though it is your day, the bridesmaids are doing you a favour. Wouldn't you rather they stand up tall and proud and happy in all your photos because they are wearing something they like and that makes them beautiful too?

Clare
 
What Clare and TeTe said. My DIL gave her bridesmaids a color that looked good on all of them (red) and let them choose their dresses. I think it's rare that a single style of dress flatters all figures.
 
I also did what TeTe did....my bridesmaids wore black dresses....They were all different in style of their choice and their price range. I also had a bridesmaid who was 7 months pregnant :rolleyes:...so there was no way I could have everyone in the same style...Even if I had wanted to. :D

It was nice to have everyone happy and comfortable in their dresses. We used a multitude of colors in the flowers which brightened everything up. :) With all of that being said...It is your day. :) You are the one who gets to decide what your friends/family wear. Have you see the movie '27 Dresses'?? Gotta rent that one or catch it on HBO before you make your decision!! :D

Good luck with your dilemma!
 
I agree that it is the Bride's final decision but she has to take into account what colour and style will suit everyone.

I remember my sister still being so ticked off when she was a bridemaid for her GF b/c one of the other attendants was quite big compared to all the others so of course the style had to be something to suit her. Well she was the only one who looked good as the dresses just looked like tents on all the others. If all your attendants are different shapes/sizes then the best route to go is to pick the colour and let them pick the styles especially since most times the bride is not paying for it. Remember most of these dresses go in a closet and never get worn again.

Remember you want your friends to have fun and enjoy the day too as it is supposed to be a day of celebration. Its hard to get cheery if your miserable b/c you think you look terrible.

Just my 2 cents.
 
Another vote that it is your day and things should look like you want.

That being said being considerate is nice and preserves friendships. Not that everyone has to approve your decision, just things like price and style. If you have someone really big or really small, make sure your chosen dress is available in their size, etc...

In the long run, try to remember that something will not go the way you want and you will be more likely to laugh about it than cry in the years to come.
 
I've got 21 cousins & I've been in LOTS of weddings. I did not have a say in a single one of them. And I didn't whine about it either. ;)

When it comes to color, seems to me color is traditionally chosen by season, not by what looks best on who.
 
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