Christmas Card Envy! :P

sparrow13

sparrow13

Cathlete
So do you ever get those Xmas cards that make you feel completely inadequate as a human being? Or like the most boring person on the planet? :p

We received two Xmas cards today:

One friend sent the year's rundown of what everyone in her family has been up to. Inevitably little Janie has raised millions for abused chiggers, little Johnny has learned how to split the atom while still in diapers, dad has been promoted so high in the company they have him sitting on the roof, and mom herself found time to invent a broccoli that tastes like chocolate-covered marshmallows while losing 50 pounds, knitting a gross of baby hats and serving on every board in a 30 mile radius.

Other friends sent their annual "here we are in a perfectly fabulous location" picture Christmas card. This year the happy couple was in Holland for 3 weeks before heading to Thailand to visit friends. You know where DH and I went this year? The DMV, the grocery store, the end of the driveway to grab the free paper. I swear, next year I'm going to take a picture of us embracing in front of our ramshackle chicken coop and then send it out to folks as a card saying "Here we are in compelling Sri Lanka..."

Of course, I am totally kidding. I love getting these cards. Really. :p
 
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Oh yeah...we get a few of those, too...blech! They're all so phony.

Have you ever read David Sedaris' "The Santaland Diaries"? One chapter is a Christmas letter gone terribly wrong...it's a hoot! :D
 
OMG! Sparrow I love you! I ALWAYS feel like the biggest loser when I get those. We have one family that sends out a letter and the woman who writes it does so in the 3rd person! "And Lisa climbed Mt. Everest..." It drives me nuts. And I have to say, too, I have a hard time with the picture thing, too. Do I keep them, throw them away, what? I never send out pictures of my kids because I don't know what others are doing with my pictures! Disclaimer: I am a scrooge! I much prefer Thanksgiving-food and family-no stress. Thanks for making me feel better:)
 
I just got a similar card to your first one yesterday. It was the first card of the season. I'm usually a little envious but this year, since I just lost my job (Merry Christmas! You last day is December 19th!) my son just failed Algebra 1 and we have traveled to about the same places as you this year - I'm really not into it.

I do love getting the cards/letters and getting caught up on what people I only hear from once or twice a year are doing, but . . . .
 
kgalas said:
OMG! Sparrow I love you! I ALWAYS feel like the biggest loser when I get those. We have one family that sends out a letter and the woman who writes it does so in the 3rd person! "And Lisa climbed Mt. Everest..." It drives me nuts. And I have to say, too, I have a hard time with the picture thing, too. Do I keep them, throw them away, what? I never send out pictures of my kids because I don't know what others are doing with my pictures! Disclaimer: I am a scrooge! I much prefer Thanksgiving-food and family-no stress. Thanks for making me feel better:)
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I hate the pictures -- I send my kids pictures to my parents and my in laws, that's it. I get about 30 pictures every christmas season and I'll keep them til I toss the cards then I toss the pictures. I have enough boxes of pictures of my own kids without adding other children to it!!! (And truthfully, 5 years from now when I go through the pictures I'll more then likely say "who are these children?)
 
Travis, that's exactly how I feel! I only give pictures to my immediate family. And I only keep the cards from my parents/brother, etc. There used to be a charity where you could send your old xmas cards and kids would use them to make new ones to sell, etc. I wish I could find something like that again to assuage the guilt I feel when I toss them! Glad to know I'm not alone:)
 
I got one of those this year....over a few glasses of wine I rewrote it for pizazz. Instead of "Hooly Who graduated from Pepperdine Magna Cum Laude" I wrote "Hooly Who was busted with a tranvestite prostitute and two vials of crack while visiting friends at a rave party in Camden, NJ" I guess you had to be there but I had a pretty good laugh. I was even tempted to send them the "corrected" copy. My grandmother would have been mortified to see how pompous some of her family has become!
 
I am another one that hates those "brag" letters. Glad I am not the only one that feels that way. And, I am another one that likes Thanksgiving better than Christmas.

Joanne
 
I have one friend who used to send out the funniest newsletters. She would say a few nice things about her husband and kids, and then spend the rest of the letter talking about how much weight she'd gained, how her kids thought she was nuts, how she had injured herself recently putting up the Christmas lights, and her thoughts on whether or not having another kid would put her over the edge. It was the only newsletter I actually looked forward to getting.
 
I hate the "Christmas Letter".
First because I either get it from someone I haven't heard from in a year, I mean you had 3 freakin days to write and print and address and mail your letter,
COULDN'T YOU FIND 5 MINUTES DURING THE YEAR to pick up the phone and say hello, or shoot me an email??????

Or I get the picture from the friends I do see all the time and they are in it!!! I know what you like like!!! I see you every goddamn day!!! What, is this a good hair day for you or something???? New Christmas sweater?? :confused:

And why do I care where your picture was taken?? If I sent a letter about MY year, it would not be so cheery. Nobody's life is that cheery, and if it is....
I don't want to hear about it in a letter

ellie
 
Sparrow!

You made my day...the end of the driveway for the newspaper, the DMV...too funny. You are so right, though, they are so damn annoying.

Jodi- I love the idea your friend has. Now that's the kind of newsletter I'd actually enjoy reading and could identify with.

Heidi
 
I hate those too... but get this... I got a Christmas card from my office this year, and I SIGNED IT!!! so technically I am having to resort to sending MYSELF cards this year!!!
 
I hate the Christmas letter. My mom's side of the fam always did them. I should send one with the lowlights of the year.

Merry Christmas to everyone! This year's highlight include the dog dying, the cat almost dying (again), the new dog eating the furniture, Nan's boss engaging in illegal activity, undiagnosed chest pain in DH, a few expensive car repairs, a lower income job change, knee surgery, heel spurs, plantar faciitis, and 2 rounds of the stomach bug. Merry Christmas again, and may the New Year be just as good!

I don't mind the pictures of people's family so much, unless their all in matching reindeer sweaters. I don't like cards with pics of just peoples kids. I'm not a big fan of children, so I certainly don't want pictures of your kids.

grrrr
Nan
 
You guys are killing me!!! All of my in-laws send out letters like that! I hate them (the letters, not the in-laws, well on second thought.... j/k)!!! What's even worse though is that two of my sister n' law's send them from their baby's point of view. It's awful and soooo corny!!! I have been dying to write one from my dog's perspective - "For Christmas Mommy got a pair of boring arse socks again. She did not seem amused, but I was too preoccupied with licking my butt to notice much more..."
 
Hate, hate, hate those "perfect family" letters....a few years ago a friend of mine actually wrote one and made a total joke out of each member of her family and it was the best letter...we all still laugh over it...I swear people write them just to hear themselves talk...and while were at it, why do they insist on mailing them to people they see everyday. This friend of mine plays tennis on Friday nights with a group of ladies (Im one of them), well in her xmas letter she makes it sound like were this amazing exclusive tennis league!!! It's total bs....it drives me nut
 
what's even more annoying to me is reading about people I don't know.

I've gotten christmas letters from people I barely know and they talk about everyone in their family who I know even less than them!!! I've actually quit reading those I just toss them.
 
I must be the lone weirdo. I like getting Christmas letters because I get to see what the family has done over the past year. Yeah, some of them are a little braggy, but it's nice to know someone cares enough to sit down and bang out a letter to share the highlights of the year.

Well, most are the highlights. My parents had a friend who used to send out a letter that was the exact opposite. We used to call it the annual Christmas tale of woe. I swear, she told us about everything that went wrong over the year and never about anything good that happened. It was a good chuckle, because most of the stuff was minor and happens to everyone. It was just sooo pathetic, though.
 
I think I'm in the minority here, but I like getting Xmas letters. Life is just sooo busy its hard to keep up with people so I think it's a good way.

I even sent out one of those letters a few years ago but haven't found time to ever do it again!

What's the point of just sending a Xmas card with just your signature on it? Might as well not send anything at all. Baa Humbug..(sp??):p
 
Ah yes. We too have received the annual family update, and we too have composed our own R-rated version. You gotta admit...this kind of stuff is great for laughs. :D
 
Gayle said:
Oh yeah...we get a few of those, too...blech! They're all so phony.

Have you ever read David Sedaris' "The Santaland Diaries"? One chapter is a Christmas letter gone terribly wrong...it's a hoot! :D
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I love David Sedaris. I don't remember the Christmas letter chapter but the one about when he was a elf at Macy's is one of my favorites.

We hardly get any Christmas cards so I envy those of you that get the annoying Christmas letters. I would love to make fun of them with DH. Maybe that's why we don't get any.
 
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