Why is this considered o.k.??

Oh, and for the record, I have not received the "too thin" load of crap in a while...not since I have added a few pounds of muscle. Now I get "Are you a personal trainer"? from those who don't know I am a SAHM. So, either friends and family got use to "the look", they don't think I am "too thin" anymore, or they know they are barking up the wrong tree. Either way, their silence is golden!
 
Yeah...I think the media takes some kind of sick pleasure in reporting up to the minute weight fluctuations on actresses. Can yo imagine? If they start to put on a few, the media jumps on it and accuses them of being pregnant. Once it's confirmed that the actress is not pregnant, they blast rude headlines such as "Hilary Duff Puffs Up" (that is one that I will never forget reading!) Then, amidst all of the scrutiny and nastiness about her less than-anorexic physique, what does Hilary do? She quickly loses weight because she is so hurt by the headlines that talk about how fat she is. Then, after all that, she gets accused of being anorexic. It's enough to make you nuts.

I truly believe that if I was an actress or famous in some other way, I would make it a rule to never read what is written about myself, unless it is something that borders on defamation or geniuine importance. I would tell my publicist to only inform me of worthwhile things that are being said...other than that, I wouldn't want to hear about it! It's no wonder these ladies are so mixed up.

Dianna

http://www.picturetrail.com/Luv2WorkHard
 
I get this all the time Mostly from family. I hate holidays!! Everyone is always so interested in what I eat or don't eat. Just because I make healthier chooses and KNOW what is an appropriate portion size ,..... Ugggggggg!! I could go on all day. DH says just blow it off. Well, it bugs the crap out of me and it gets OLD!!! I also get why do you workout ????? Uh, so I don't become like 2/3s of the rest of the population. Sorry to rant.

Catherine

http://bestsmileys.com/exercising/1.gif
 
Actually, I can't remember a time in my life when it WASN'T "okay" to criticize someone or comment on their weight. I got that same boatload of crap when I was a teenager (and a butterball) back in the mid-70's, and I'll bet my mother got it in her day as well.

For some reason, body weight and/or body size seem to be open topics; it's just gotten more intense in these media-soaked times.

For all of my bleating about how intrusive it is, I must confess: a couple of weeks ago I caught up with one of my classmates from paralegal boot camp, and she looked about half the size of when I'd last seen her some two years previous. I couldn't help but comment that she looked like she'd leaned out (I used those words exactly). She was pleased; she told me she had lost over 90 pounds simply by watching her food intake and going to a variety of exercise classes.

I don't think we'll ever be rid of the Weight Talk.

And Jo-Jo and Beans - when are you free for the next Meating? Some time soon after Labor Day?

A-Jock
 
Nettie & Jilly-

Looking very forward to getting together with you soon. Yes, after Labor Day let's plan the meating.

Joanne
 
I see nothing wrong with comments like "It looks like you have leaned out". Maybe it's just me, but I do not see the problem with that! Maybe I just hate the word "skinny"!!! I think it is mean to say "you look to skinny" and can't understand why loved ones think they can say it with little regard to how it makes you feel!

Maybe because it taps into such a huge insecurity on their part that it makes them blind to other peoples feelings??? Am I on to something??
 
I really think they say it because society says it is acceptable to be thin. They figure that you should not be offended. Skinny is not a nice term for a thin or slim looking person. It is kind of like slang in my perspective. Still I think mostly it is accepted as good. I have had people say I was so skinny and then ask how much I can bench. Or comment about my muscle next. I don't let it bother me. There are many more people out there having a struggle with weight. They do not realize or think that there are people out there that are fighting to keep there weight up and that it is not ok to make those kind of statements. So much has been put out there about eating disorders that that it is formost in peoples minds when they see a thin person and applies a lot of negativity to it.I hope I am making sense here.
Diane Sue
http://wd.1ww.us
 
Perfect sense!!! Since so many view "skinny" as much more desireable description than "fat", it's o.k. to tell someone they look "too skinny"...even though they are not complementing that person. But since they are flinging a term that hits lower on the rector scale, then it's fine.
 
I agree that a lot of people don't recognize there is a slightly negative connotation to the word "skinny." But by the same token, I have to say, if someone ever used that term to describe me (as in, "you've gotten skinny" or "skinny minny") I would take it as a compliment. Any word that implied I was thin would be welcome! However, I can also see how in other situations said to other folks, it may not be used as or perceived as a compliment.

People do make out-of-line comments about weight all the time. I remember a (very thin) colleague at my former school remarking to another woman (intending to compliment) that the woman had lost "a ton of weight" and that she "should never let herself get that way again." What is wrong with just saying, "You look great!" or "You've lost some weight" rather than saying a "ton" of weight.

The other thing that hasn't been mentioned...I have a very fit acquaintance (I'm talking she has very little body fat, 6-pack abs, size 4-6) who constantly talks about how she's getting fat or she looks fat, etc. I wonder if it ever occurred to her to think about the people around her who are bigger than her. Personally, I think she does it to fish for compliments and to deliberately make others feel bad.
 
Television certainly takes joy in others misfortune. People watch crap like American Idol where insulting acts is part of the "entertainment"
I say flip the script when someone makes an igornant comment.
Q: "How come you,re so thin?"
A: "How come you're so nosey?" (or other adjective of choice)
 
>I really think they say it because society says it is
>acceptable to be thin. They figure that you should not be
>offended. Skinny is not a nice term for a thin or slim
>looking person.

I think people have lost the sense of the nuance of words. "Skinny" of 'skinny' has negative connotations, and evokes images of a 'skinny-fat' person with no muscle tone. "slim" or "thin" or "lean" are much better. The latter evokes images of "slim, with good muscle tone." Many people seem to use 'skinny' as a positive word, even saying they 'want to be skinny'. Just doesn't work that way for me.

Several years ago, one of my colleagues (a very odd woman), said to me "How do you stay so skinny?" She meant it in a positive way, but a friend/colleague who was within earshot, and who has the same perspective as I do, said to me that this colleague is the one who is skinny (no muscle tone, not looking that healthy).
 
I just say

"I'm sorry you don't approve of the way I look, but this is just what my body looks like when I treat it well and give it healthy foods and exercise."

No one has had anything to say after that.

It is really silly because I have had people suggest to me that I need eat more junk food so that I don't lose any more weight. Is that really what life is all about? I want to live and have energy to play with my little boy and hopefully future children. Why would I eat junk food just to not be "skinny" (which I am not)? Why clog up my arteries? Makes no sense to me.
 
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