Best things I did for my wedding:
1. Had the ceremony and the reception at the same place. I wanted my guests to park once, then relax and enjoy. No driving around, no car processions, no fuss. Also, there was only one place to deal with, and they thought of EVERYTHING so I didn't have to! They made everything so easy! They recommended a florist, DJ, photographer and even the rabbi! It was the BEST decision.
2. Kept costs down by: choosing a lovely little inn that was off the beaten path, and having an afternoon wedding instead of evening. The place had just enough rooms for my whole immediate family to stay overnight. The night before the wedding turned out to be more fun than the wedding itself! We wouldn't have done that for an evening wedding.
3. Kids in the wedding party are more fun than a barrel of monkeys. Our whole wedding party was made up of nieces and nephews, and every kid was included. It was a brilliant idea.
4. We had a table with keepsakes from our parents and grandparents weddings that everyone commented on, including photos and old wedding invitations and scrapbooks. It gave our wedding a sense of history and continuity of family. I highly recommend this!
5. Fabulous food: no boring wedding food. The inn we chose was also a fabulous restaurant, with great chefs and a superb wine list. This was very important to me.
6. Another good idea is to save money on a wedding dress. I found a lovely Jessica McClintock for under $300. I just could not bear the thought of wasting money on a dress I would never wear again, but you may feel differently.
I guess the bottom line is to pick and choose those things that are important to you, and those things you didn't care about and spend accordingly. I was willing to spend more for great food, but didn't care about the dress. Some people may feel the opposite. You have to follow your own heart.
Hope this gives you some ideas!