Mother of Octuplets/Update

[Skyy2]

You all may be upset with me for saying this... but, I know from experience that none of my fertility doctors would bend to my pleas to transfer more than 3 embryos when I was doing IVF.

I was older than 35 and already had two older kids so my odds were diminishing after every failure. They still refused to put more than 3 back. The doctor almost went with 4- but asked me if I would reduce if I had multiples, and I looked him in the eyes and lied and said that I would. But in my heart I knew that I wouldn’t be able to if the situation came up. In my case, the situation never came up because the cycles failed.

I don’t say that I agree with this mother or with her doctor, but when you are sitting in that chair, facing that doctor- who you think at the time- holds your future, you may say anything.

I am just really happy that each of her babies are making it so far, and if I had extra money, I would send it to her.

 

[ladysaraii]

I'm another who thinks she is a selfish person or something is wrong with her. I agre with another poster (MArta?)'s comments. I'm glad the kids are surviving, I hope they grow well and have a happy fulfilled life and I hope she finds a legitmate way to support her kids that doesnt entail exploiting the public.

 

[kathryn]

I hope she finds a legitmate way to support her kids that doesnt entail exploiting the public.

Or the children, I'd add.
I can just see her taking her kids on talk shows, like they are circus freaks.

And I worry about the health (both short-term and long-term) of a batch of 8 premies.

Has anyone heard how they are doing, apart from still being in intensive care?

 

[Gayle]

I feel bad for her mother. She dumped quite a load on her...I could never do something like that to my parents.

 

[booboo39]

Long rant!

I find it very creepy and disconcerting that she claims to have had all these babies to make up for whatever issues (can't remember the details} she may have had during childhood. Whatever those childhood reasons are, that is no excuse for having children. One should not seek to solve childhood issues by having kids. With that said, her actions, her SELFISH, actions are everyone's business. Due to their low birth weight, the will have developmental delays, learning disabilities, hearing or sight impairments, possible heart defects the list goes on. Who will foot the bill for that, certainly not her!!!! How will she ever be able to equally "love them, hold them" (all fourteen of em'!!) as she claimed. Maybe some of them will grow up with the same issues she may have experienced during childhood as she will NEVER be able to provide the emotional, moral and financial support they deserve. So they grow up with these issues and what do they do? Do what mommy did, have lots of babies that they can't afford to fill that void!

I believe she indicated going back to school for a masters degree next year or something of the sort. Is she gonna shlep those babies to class with her or will she rely on someone else to care for them while she goes to school?? With fourteen kids to feed, clothe and educate, where is she going to find the money for an education? Well being single with all those kids will certainly qualify her for financial aid (a lovely term for welfare.)

I know I sound harsh but living here by the mexican border I see people all the time taking advantage of the system. Regardless of a mother of fourteen or an illegal alien, abusing the system. Even single mothers who have SO living with them and getting welfare, food stamps, living under HUD housing. It's nauseating when many are losing their jobs, taking deep pay cuts, losing investment money and so on. I saw a case on Judge Judy where a welfare momma was suing someone for damaging her $300 dollar cell phone. I was glad to see JJ rip this woman a new one when she admitted to being on welfare. This is the crap that unfortunately goes on all the time but we unfortunately live in such a politically sensitive society where we can not call and ace of spades and ace of spades for fear of being called judgmental or insensitive. Whew, its been a long time since I became so passionate about an issue of this nature.
Booboo

 

[sweaty1]

I am going to get in soooo much trouble saying this....but....
Did anyone see her interview? Does anyone agree this woman has had plastic sugery?
How the heck did she afford that?
I am not against it at all; it isn't for me (although I could probably use it!) but that isn't why I bring this up. Am I way off base here?

If so, I really then do not get her at all.

Just my two cents. I am not judging (oh, maybe a little); but just wondering if anyone else thinks that. If so, I am not at all sure what is going on.

Wow...I can't believe the can of worms I may have just opened...yikes!

Becky

 

[MadnNatsmom]

>>>I am just really happy that each of her babies are making it so far, and if I had extra money, I would send it to her.<<<

Well, it's your money, IMO but there are tens of thousands of other deserving women and children than her.

 

[Liann]

I am going to get in soooo much trouble saying this....but....
Did anyone see her interview? Does anyone agree this woman has had plastic sugery?
How the heck did she afford that?
I am not against it at all; it isn't for me (although I could probably use it!) but that isn't why I bring this up. Am I way off base here?
Becky

She's definitely had something done. Those "Meg Ryan on a bad day lips" are not found in nature. Those mental ward jobs must pay out some good disability! There was some more news today about how 2 of her children are also on disability and she is on food stamps. No judgment calls from me on that, just think the story keeps getting deeper and deeper. I feel bad for all those kids.

 

[marnold]

I think from where I sit, most of us in small towns, are sickened by the sheer volume of people who receive government assistance (in any form) and when a case like this comes along our hackles are raised. Where I live, 60% of my little town receives a check from the gov't. Most days, I feel like dividing my paycheck up and delivering it door to door. Sure everybody can get it, but what happened to pride, hard work and informed decisions? I am like a lot of you, I would give you the shirt off my back if you needed it, but good faith counts for something...doesn't it?

 

[peytonsmommy]

Skyy - ITA. Regardless of whatever people think about the mom, the dr here was totally negligent

and she got pregnant because she did not want to destroy those frozen embroyos

I have a slight problem with this because if she truly didn't want to destroy those embies why not donate them? Or at least let them sit in deepfreeze until the time comes you can at least afford to feed them?

I love how she states she "refuses to accept welfare" but she's on foodstamps because she doesn't consider that welfare, just a service for families that need it.

I have to say that as a parent of an only child the whole "poor me my childhood sucked because I didn't have siblings" just ticks me off.

Generally I side with the "not my kids not my problem" argument, but this case really gets under my skin for several reasons. First, it is yet another story giving ART bad press. Second, it really ticks me off to see yet another big family living off of help because they can't control their need to reproduce. If you want to have 20 kids and you can support each and every one of them then fine. I still might not agree w/ having that many kids for other reasons, but it's your own business and no skin off of my nose. Have 20 kids and expect to depend on the taxes that I can't really afford to pay to feed those kids, then it really ticks me off. I simply cannot understand people that have all these kids and can barely afford to feed them let alone spend quality time with them, and yet they continue to have more because they "love kids".

 

[baylian]

I am going to get in soooo much trouble saying this....but....
Did anyone see her interview? Does anyone agree this woman has had plastic sugery?
How the heck did she afford that?
I am not against it at all; it isn't for me (although I could probably use it!) but that isn't why I bring this up. Am I way off base here?

If so, I really then do not get her at all.

Just my two cents. I am not judging (oh, maybe a little); but just wondering if anyone else thinks that. If so, I am not at all sure what is going on.

Wow...I can't believe the can of worms I may have just opened...yikes!

Becky

Well thank you Lord it's not just me! I am surprised you haven't been flamed for your observation!!

Check out my original thread on this very subject.

http://www.thecathenation.com/forum/showthread.php?p=1823004#post1823004

 

[baylian]

I think from where I sit, most of us in small towns, are sickened by the sheer volume of people who receive government assistance (in any form) and when a case like this comes along our hackles are raised. Where I live, 60% of my little town receives a check from the gov't. Most days, I feel like dividing my paycheck up and delivering it door to door. Sure everybody can get it, but what happened to pride, hard work and informed decisions? I am like a lot of you, I would give you the shirt off my back if you needed it, but good faith counts for something...doesn't it?

Can I have an amen to that statement!

 

[peytonsmommy]

I'll jump in on the lips. They were for sure the first thing I thought about when I saw the interview!

 

[hiitdogs]

Skyy - ITA. Regardless of whatever people think about the mom, the dr here was totally negligent



I have a slight problem with this because if she truly didn't want to destroy those embies why not donate them? Or at least let them sit in deepfreeze until the time comes you can at least afford to feed them?

I love how she states she "refuses to accept welfare" but she's on foodstamps because she doesn't consider that welfare, just a service for families that need it.

I have to say that as a parent of an only child the whole "poor me my childhood sucked because I didn't have siblings" just ticks me off.

Generally I side with the "not my kids not my problem" argument, but this case really gets under my skin for several reasons. First, it is yet another story giving ART bad press. Second, it really ticks me off to see yet another big family living off of help because they can't control their need to reproduce. If you want to have 20 kids and you can support each and every one of them then fine. I still might not agree w/ having that many kids for other reasons, but it's your own business and no skin off of my nose. Have 20 kids and expect to depend on the taxes that I can't really afford to pay to feed those kids, then it really ticks me off. I simply cannot understand people that have all these kids and can barely afford to feed them let alone spend quality time with them, and yet they continue to have more because they "love kids".

I don't disagree with you! I wouldn't want to have that many kids. Geeh, I have two and I have my hands full. Just as a matter of principle, I think people need to stay away from other people's reproductive rights.

It bothers me a lot less that my tax $$ go to welfare than to pay spa packages for AIG managers or to pay billions for spreading freedom and democracy around the world - aka unnecessary wars.

That being said though I do think that the welfare system in this country needs a complete overhaul so that people who fall on hard times get TEMPORARY assistance and meaningful help to get back on their feet. But that is a different concept than just handing out food stamps or welfare checks IMO.

 

[marnold]

Amen Carola! Why is this such an impossible thing to ask for? Enough is enough...

 

[baylian]

That would be all fine if that were the case but most welfare recipients milk it to the bitter end.

And I would rather give money to my church for them to help the needy.

 

[peytonsmommy]

It bothers me a lot less that my tax $$ go to welfare than to pay spa packages for AIG managers or to pay billions for spreading freedom and democracy around the world - aka unnecessary wars.

Oh yeah, I can talk all day about THAT too! lol. I just get tired of paying money to the government just to have them turn around and hand it out to people that shouldn't be getting it (be that banks, CEO's, or hoarders of children).

ITA about there being a need for programs like food stamps to help people get back on their feet, but not for long term use. To me if you are getting assitance then you should also be coming up w/ a way to get OFF assistance...I don't see how having eight MORE children is a good way to get OFF food stamps?

Has any article said what she is studying in school? She keeps saying she'll be able to support the kids after she graduates. I'm assuming it's medschool because I can't think of a job off the top of my head that will support a family of 15 people right out of school, especially when some fo those kids are special needs.

For the kids' sake though I hope she has some help. It sounds like her parents have given up on her and can't take it anymore. I work a FT job and go to school at night and only have ONE child (and a husband - though some days i'm not sure if that's an asset or a liability lol) and my day is about impossible. I can't imagine making quality time for 14 children with my schedule. Again, that's her problem not mine, but I really feel for those kids.

 

[mj476]

Has any article said what she is studying in school? She keeps saying she'll be able to support the kids after she graduates. I'm assuming it's medschool because I can't think of a job off the top of my head that will support a family of 15 people right out of school, especially when some fo those kids are special needs.

She said she's going to school to become a counselor. Although I think she needs to speak to a counselor herself or should have before she had all those kids.

Marcy

 

[WRITER]

You all may be upset with me for saying this... but, I know from experience that none of my fertility doctors would bend to my pleas to transfer more than 3 embryos when I was doing IVF..

Well, this is what I've been wondering -- why did her fertility doctor allow this??

 

[peytonsmommy]

She said she's going to school to become a counselor.

OH. MY. Okay, first I used to work in mental health and she's sadly mistaken if she's planning on raking in the dough. Second, she really thinks people are going to willing to see her? I mean I know we all have our issues and I wouldn't expect my counselor to be perfect but come on this woman has some issues.