How do you avoid debates?

Rocket

Rocket

Member
I'm seriously dreading Thanksgiving because my relatives, whom I dearly love, and I fall on different ends of the political spectrum.

Sometimes their comments about my candidate or my stands on issues are snarky. Sometimes they're just opinions presented as truths. But in both cases, they make me uncomfortable and, well, resentful.

Past experience has taught me not to engage in debate. Nothing good EVER comes of that. So I'm looking for nonresponsive responses to their comments and questions -- things I can say to stop the discussion cold.

So far, all I've come up is, "Oh, I'm burned out on politics." That'll work once, but I'll need more. Any ideas?
 
Rocket said:
I'm seriously dreading Thanksgiving because my relatives, whom I dearly love, and I fall on different ends of the political spectrum.

Sometimes their comments about my candidate or my stands on issues are snarky. Sometimes they're just opinions presented as truths. But in both cases, they make me uncomfortable and, well, resentful.

Past experience has taught me not to engage in debate. Nothing good EVER comes of that. So I'm looking for nonresponsive responses to their comments and questions -- things I can say to stop the discussion cold.

So far, all I've come up is, "Oh, I'm burned out on politics." That'll work once, but I'll need more. Any ideas?
Click to expand...

I generally just smile politely and say "I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree on that one." And then walk away or introduce a new topic.

I'm hosting this year and have already quietly passed the word to certain people I can count on that I don't want any political debates, if possible.

Sparrow
 
You just have to do what I do with my SIL -- just tell them right up front that politics and religion are off limits. My SIL drives me nuts with her constant, apparent NEED to convert me. :mad:
 
Rocket said:
I'm seriously dreading Thanksgiving because my relatives, whom I dearly love, and I fall on different ends of the political spectrum.

Sometimes their comments about my candidate or my stands on issues are snarky. Sometimes they're just opinions presented as truths. But in both cases, they make me uncomfortable and, well, resentful.

Past experience has taught me not to engage in debate. Nothing good EVER comes of that. So I'm looking for nonresponsive responses to their comments and questions -- things I can say to stop the discussion cold.

So far, all I've come up is, "Oh, I'm burned out on politics." That'll work once, but I'll need more. Any ideas?
Click to expand...


Isnt that what kids are for? DIVERSION!!! :eek:I use my nieces & nephews as my EXIT TABLE QUICKLY strategy!
..... As far as saying a topic is Off Limits- I personally dont like to dictate what my group of 40 can chat about- I'd PREFER they dont but hey- Free Country & all.
Just find a way to excuse yourself once converstaion goes in that direction if you dont want to participate. I often look at the DEBATER & chuckle- he soon is standing all by his little self (still yacking!);):rolleyes: because everyone has followed my exit lead!
Arent holiday gatherings just the BEST!?:cool:
 
There is always tension at my family gatherings too. I am the least outspoken, I am like 0% outspoken, so I just mind my own business. I DO let it get to me, unfortunately, though.

Clarissa
 
I just tell them up front when they start talking about it that you've always found it best to stay away from political discussions, since they never result in anything good.
If they press you on it, leave the room.
If they follow you, leave the house.

You may have to be abrupt about it, but for some people, that's the only way they'll get the message. You don't have to be rude, but you do have to be matter of fact.
 
In our family, we discuss what we are truly thanful for and why. Some people have real big life issues and need emotional support. Lost jobs, sick children, economy etc. We start every time with that and end up having a wonderful time. Some years we skip T-day altogether and go to a soup kitchen in the city to help out. BIG EYE OPENER!!!!
Good Luck
elliemom
 
It depends on who's in the conversation. If it's another reasonable individual who likes to discuss things civilly, I chat with them.

If it's someone who spits venom, I ignore it.
 
Thanks, everybody. You solved it for me.

I've decided that if my blood pressure starts rising and there are no dogs or kiddies around, my mind will go to a happy place. Either 1) Sparrow13's house, where discussion is civil and nobody has to prepare conversation exits, or 2) that bad-ass skelaton who says exactly what I'm thinking!
 
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