Favorite Joke
- Thread starter eriniski
- Start date
eminenz2
Cathlete
Why do chicken coops have two doors?
Because if they had four doors, they'd be chicken sedans.
What did the deer say when she came out of the woods?
I'll never do that for two bucks again.
Why did the cowboy buy a dachsund?
Because he wanted a long little doggie.
How do you make holy water?
Boil the hell out of it.
Hee. I love silly jokes.
A duck walks into a bar. He hops up on a stool and says to the bartender, "You got any grapes?"
"No," says the bartender, "We serve drinks and snacks like pretzels and peanuts."
The duck leaves.
The next day the same duck comes into the bar. He hops up on the stool and asks the bartender, "You got any grapes?"
"No," the bartender says, "I told you yesterday we serve drinks and snacks like pretzels and peanuts."
The duck jumped down and left.
The next day the duck comes back in and hops up on the barstool. "Hey bartender," the duck said, "You got any grapes?"
"Listen, buddy, " said the bartender, "I've told you twice already - we ain't got no grapes here. We serve drinks and snacks. And if you ask me again, I'm gonna nail your beak to the bar. Now get outta here."
The duck leaves.
The fourth day the duck comes back and gets up on the stool. "You gotta any nails?" he asked the bartender.
"No," answered the bartender.
"You got any grapes?"
BWAHAHAHAHA! I love that one!!! Got any grapes? heeheeheeheehee
Susan L.G.
Because if they had four doors, they'd be chicken sedans.
What did the deer say when she came out of the woods?
I'll never do that for two bucks again.
Why did the cowboy buy a dachsund?
Because he wanted a long little doggie.
How do you make holy water?
Boil the hell out of it.
Hee. I love silly jokes.
A duck walks into a bar. He hops up on a stool and says to the bartender, "You got any grapes?"
"No," says the bartender, "We serve drinks and snacks like pretzels and peanuts."
The duck leaves.
The next day the same duck comes into the bar. He hops up on the stool and asks the bartender, "You got any grapes?"
"No," the bartender says, "I told you yesterday we serve drinks and snacks like pretzels and peanuts."
The duck jumped down and left.
The next day the duck comes back in and hops up on the barstool. "Hey bartender," the duck said, "You got any grapes?"
"Listen, buddy, " said the bartender, "I've told you twice already - we ain't got no grapes here. We serve drinks and snacks. And if you ask me again, I'm gonna nail your beak to the bar. Now get outta here."
The duck leaves.
The fourth day the duck comes back and gets up on the stool. "You gotta any nails?" he asked the bartender.
"No," answered the bartender.
"You got any grapes?"
BWAHAHAHAHA! I love that one!!! Got any grapes? heeheeheeheehee
Susan L.G.
martijean1
Cathlete
What do you call a constipated German????
Farfrompoopin
From my DD in middle school...
MJ
Farfrompoopin
From my DD in middle school...
MJ
chachi
Cathlete
I don't get the grape joke either but I still laughed :7
Love this thread..I needed a little laugh.
Thanks guys!
Chastity
http://www.picturetrail.com:80/chastgirl0205
Love this thread..I needed a little laugh.
Thanks guys!
Chastity
http://www.picturetrail.com:80/chastgirl0205
SirenSongWoman
Cathlete
The duck/grape one is HYSTERICAL!
Explanation of the duck/grape joke>>>
The bartender is frustrated at the duck for asking for grapes and tells him "if you ask me again, I'm gonna nail your beak to the bar." The very smart duck then asks the bartender if he has any nails in order to find out if the bartender can carry out his threat, and when the bartender says no, the duck knows it's safe to ask for grapes again.
The bartender is frustrated at the duck for asking for grapes and tells him "if you ask me again, I'm gonna nail your beak to the bar." The very smart duck then asks the bartender if he has any nails in order to find out if the bartender can carry out his threat, and when the bartender says no, the duck knows it's safe to ask for grapes again.
Matiana
Cathlete
>My DH told me these last night
>Hey, I almost got arrested today-
>Why?
>(Flex Biceps) Cuz, I'm packing guns...
I loved this one 'cause my boyfriend and I always call our biceps guns. (We got it from Anchorman)
Anyhoo, my boyfriend is a little spazzy so first I warned him that I was going to tell him a joke and I said, I almost got arrested today.
He jumps up starts going off, why? what happened? what did you do now? Were you speeding? Was it at the courthouse? (I work for lawyers)
And that was the end of my joke. I had to calm him down and the ending not so funny anymore. <sigh> Too bad it was a goody and a good reference to us.
>Hey, I almost got arrested today-
>Why?
>(Flex Biceps) Cuz, I'm packing guns...
I loved this one 'cause my boyfriend and I always call our biceps guns. (We got it from Anchorman)
Anyhoo, my boyfriend is a little spazzy so first I warned him that I was going to tell him a joke and I said, I almost got arrested today.
He jumps up starts going off, why? what happened? what did you do now? Were you speeding? Was it at the courthouse? (I work for lawyers)
And that was the end of my joke. I had to calm him down and the ending not so funny anymore. <sigh> Too bad it was a goody and a good reference to us.
