Daughters scary expirience

[lesliemarie]

My daughter is doing well, getting excited for school to start, three more days to go LOL. Thanks Carol.
Took the kids to go play some Tennis yesterday and was a hoot, don't know if we got more balls over the fence than over the net LOL. my kids had a blast playing with us. And you are right we can't keep them in a bubble or keyed up in the house all the time, she wants to go HANG OUT now is how she calls it, not play anymore. And I fear this is only the beginning of her teenage stuff to be thrown at me LOL and I have one other teenage son. Just hope and pray I can do a good job and they can be real good resposible adults.

 

[Roses]

Leslie,

This past February, my DH and our two daughters 11 and 3 were furniture shopping. We were the only ones in the store along with two employees out front. We let the girls play in the children's area set up by the front window of the store. The employees were helping us when here came the girls and they looked liked they had seen a ghost...but come to find out...they had been flashed by a 13 year old. He flashed them on the other side of the store window...just pulled it right out in front of them.

DH immediately heads out of the store looking for this kid and after about 10 minutes (11 year old said what he had on) he finds him walking out of the fitness center with his grandparents. The girls identify him. Quote from 3 year old, "That's him mommy, that's him, he showed us his private parts and that's not very nice right mom!". The little one knows better! Anyway, this was late on a Saturday and the area wasn't very crowded.

DH reprimands the little S**T and amazingly the grandparents NEVER utter a single word, not one. (I was so proud of DH as he stayed at least 10 feet away and the store employee was standing with us as a witness as were some of the people from the fitness center.) The grandparents could see the girls were a bit rattled and they did NOTHING!!! DH got the boy to tell his name. We waited until they left and got the plate # off the car in case the boy was lying...like I'm sure he wouldn't do that (but he actually didn't), go figure.

We went straight to the police station where the girls and I stayed in the car because they had been rattled enough for one day. SURPRISE - they know the kid, guess he had been kicked off the school bus for showing his weenie. They didn't take to kindly to this incident and let DH file a report so that its part of his permanent record. Then they said they would get out later that day and talk to him. (We're thinking yeah sure). We had a short errand to run and DH calls someone who can help us out and finds the kids address. Sure enough we go by and BINGO the cops are there. That sure put my girls at ease that the cops were "Talking to that bad boy!", 3 year old again.

Every situation is different with different circumstances (you knew the boy - we didn't). Just to let you know it can happen as you already know, when you least suspect it. You're in my thoughts and I know my girls talked about it on and off for about two months and then it just hasn't been mentioned anymore. I know we all felt better about filing a report, but like I said, every situation is different. We did emphasize to the girls that they did the right thing in immediately telling us so that something could be done about it right then.

Take Care. Sami

 

[Carol_is_fit]

Leslie I am SO glad to hear you and your daughter are dealing with this, and enjoying your life! I'm so proud of both of you! Nik starts school on Thursday - 8th grade!! I'm in shock - LOL!! I think you're doing a great job! From all your posts I've read in the year plus I've been here, the love you have for your kids comes through loud and clear! Yes, it is only the beginning for us with these young teens we each have, but I love this age! They're like mini adults, in that you can talk to them as such, and you can see the wheels turning when they think a problem through. It's amazing to watch them grow and mature. What we've given them is already there. We've already laid the foundation, and all we can do now is be there when they need us, and hope they make responsible decisions. Tennis! I haven't played that in years! I should take Nik to play - she'd love that!! Yes, the word is definitely "hang out", not "play" - LOL!! Heaven forbid we use the "wrong" words, you know? LOL!!

Hang in there, Leslie! You're going a better job than you know!!

Carol

 

[lesliemarie]

Awww thank you Carol. I can't believe it either my daughter is starting 10'th grade, seems like yesterday she was my little girl getting on the bus for the first time going to kindergarten here now she only has three years till graduation.
Tennis well we go play but what we do I don't think those that play it seriously would call it that LOL we had three balls going at the same time LOL You should have seen my hubby was so funny. he was standing there and three balls at once, LOL he didn't know what ball to go for LOL and my son got a workout going for the balls we hit over the fence outside the court LOL but hey it is the fun that counts LOL no points counted just who can get it over thenet decently LOL.
And yes heaven forbid we use the wrong words with teenagers LOL my daughter is begging me to take her and her friends to the mall tomorrow!! now what is next LOL

 

[Carol_is_fit]

We just got back from the mall!! UGH!! When did they get so crowded on a Sunday afternoon??? LOL!! We just HAD to get the Jessica Simpson CD!! The one with the DVD bonus where you can see clips of her wedding. She did look very pretty, and her dress is gorgeous. I think Nik just wanted it for that - LOL!! I can handle the mall with just Nik, but when her friends go with us, I feel very old - LOL!!

Carol

 

[Marie1120]

Lesliemarie,
Sorry to hear about your daughter's expereince. You obviously did a great job with her for her to handle this so well.

We just went through an experience with DH's 22y/o daughter who had a boss that was getting too friendly. She talked to us and we encouraged her to go to the police. She did and also talked to the DA. They consider this 4th degree sexual assault so probably nothing will come of it. But DD felt better that she did something and if another report comes along later, they have a history on this guy. She quit and found another job.

A side of life we hope our kids will never need to experience but unfortunately we can't protect them from everything.

Good luck.

 

[CandiK]

Lesliemarie,

Wish you wouldn't apologize because it's not necessary. Parenting is the most difficult job on earth. You know as a parent that you can only do the best you can. Hindsight is always 20/20. I made many mistakes with my daughter as she was growing up but I didn't make them on purpose. Whatever it was, it seemed like the right decision at the time. I'd like to share with you some of the things I learned from personal experience.

1) If something doesn't sit right with you when your teenage son or daughter is telling you something, trust your instincts, they are probably lying (as much as you want to believe them, don't).

2) Teenagers are having sex at 13 years of age or younger. Not all but an extremely high percentage.

3) Don't trust any other parents with your children, even if you think you know them...you don't.

4) If I had it to do over again, I would never have let my daughter spend the night at her friends houses. You cannot trust other parents with your children.

I was pretty much a single parent and that made my job twice as difficult. It sounds like your husband is an integral part of the parenting process. Between the both of you, you have a very good chance of successfully raising your children. There will be several bumps along the way. Teenager's experiment with life...it's all part of the process of growing up. If teenager's don't venture out and explore the world, that's when it's cause to worry. All you can do is be there to guide them into making the right decisions.

I wish you luck.