What would you do?

[CollinsMom]

You are a great mom!! Good for you, (((HUGS)))

 

[aveggiegirl]

I'm so sorry that you're son had to go through this. I think you should tell the man why you are cancelling. I also think that you should trust your gut instinct. I played the trumpet for a few years and none of my teachers ever made me lift up my shirt to see how I was breathing. That's disgusting. You can be proud of your son. He did the right thing by telling you.

 

[SirenSongWoman]

Maybe he was just an old guy who didn't get it but you can't take that chance with your child. You did the right thing. You can just not return his call... I'm always concerned when you run a background check and NOTHING pops up. Often that means the individual reinvented himself, for good reason. You had a bad feeling from the get-go and your son had the same feeling. What are the odds you were both wrong?

 

[Beavs]

I know everyone may have a different opinion but here is what I would do:

1. No more lessons
2. Call and cancel and tell why - and not so politely
3. Tell the other Mom and anyone else that I thought may have a child in his classes or potentially could have their child there.
4. Report to the police.

I know #4 might seem odd or extreme, but you can make it a matter of record if nothing else. Then if the guy is caught hurting someone's child, your situation will be on file. Who is to say this guy isn't a registered sex offender?

I used to be a police officer, and this is what I'd do. Sorry your child went through this - just glad it wasn't worse. I am a firm believer that sex offenders, especially the ones that prey on children, canNOT be reformed. They should be given life in prison or executed.

Many states have a sex offender registry which I am sure was the first place the OP checked.

 

[aveggiegirl]

I can't stop thinking about this!! If this man was innocent, wouldn't he have been furious at you for even thinking that he was doing something wrong? Also, if he is innocent, why in the world would he invite your son back to his house after you had this conversation with him? Give me a break!!!!! I don't think he was taken by surprize when you brought this up. I think he had plenty of time to "rehearse" his reaction in case anyone ever called him on it. Your instincts tell you that something is wrong. Honestly, how many times have your instincts ever let you down? You definately did the right thing.

 

[booboo39]

This man is clearly old enough to know that this behavior is inappropriate. I respectfully disagree that the police should not be involved. I would have immediately contacted authorities. What if there are other parents who have contacted the police? Maybe you would be the second, third or even fourth person to contact authorities, thereby alerting them. I would rather live a lifetime of embarrassment for having potentially made too much of something innocent than a lifetime of regret for not doing so. It took a lot of courage for you to be truthful about it and conduct yourself in a calm and reasonable matter. I don't believe I could of handled it so well. Best of luck.

 

[buckeyegirl]

Thanks for all the replies and concerns. Yes, I did check the sex offender registry, and he wasn't on there. He called me back to tell me how much he appreciated the input, he had no idea that he was making Mitchell uncomfortable, that is certainly not what he intended, and he knows there are sex offenders out there - he wanted to assure me he was not one of them. He didn't sound particularly agitated or upset, just wanting to clear the air.

I'm still not sure how to feel about it - I'm glad I confronted him, I got my son out of potential harm's way, and if he is guilty, perhaps tripped him up. The other mom's DH is a very prominent physician in the area, and he's going to do a little digging around to check out some things.

Thanks for all the feedback, ladies. It was an exhausting 24 hours. Not only was I dealing with that, but the day prior had to euthanize 3 pets at work and then found out our dear neighbor died who was only 58. I had a lot to deal with emotionally.

Onto a better day and another cup of java,
Heidi

 

[MAYNARDSMOM]

Assuming he's not a perv it's good that now he knows how it can be taken & will hopefully change his habits. Glad to hear he was also polite & not nasty to you.