It used to be looks. When I was young, that was all I cared about. I didn't care what shape my body was in "inside," as long as it looked good. Then, after more than doubling my body weight within just a few years around age 30, it became simly being "normal." It's no longer being the fat lady grazing the salad bar, buying the biggest tent I can find, having to plan ahead so I'll have the energy to do simple things like shopping or going on vacation. It's not having to put up with the rudeness, both overt and covert, that the really obese have to deal with, which really zaps your faith in and love for your fellow men. It's not being an object of scorn and disgust. It's not taking 12 pills a day. It's the relief from at least some of the guilt of being such a horrible example for my son, who grew up in my out-of-control phase and is struggling with his weight and health already, at age 13. AND it's dressing up and actually looking nice instead of simply looking dressed up. But most of all, it's all about feeling alive again instead of just biding my time, waiting to die.
Shari