Rude Co-workers

T

trainergirl

Member
Hey everyone,

Has anyone ever had someone at work give them "digs". I work with a woman who is always making remarks about me working out and eating those "discusting, boring" meals. In the beginning when I first started working there, she was like "oh I wish I could look like you" and "you look like you re in shape." I hardly ever discuss my fitness regime with her or anyone else in my office. If they ask, I tell them. My co-worker is about 30lbs overweight and is trying to lose weight.

Well today on the phone someone from our home office called looking for me and she answered the phone. The person calling thought it was me on the phone and she said quote: "No it's not her" and the person on the other end must have said "well you sound like her" and my co-worker responded "well you know how it is, owners start looking like their dogs and people who work together start to sound alike." I was so taken back by her remark, I didn't know what to say, so I made believe I didn't hear it.

If I wanted to, which I won't, I could insult the way she looks. But I won't stoop to her level. I'm 5'3" and around 112lbs and muscular and proud of it. I'm tired of her "jabs" about my eating habits and my working out AND that stupid remark. How would you guys handle this?x(
 
Hi there! It doesn't sound to me like she meant any harm. I don't see anything offensive about that remark. Maybe it's just me? http://www.phpbbforfree.com/forums/images/smiles/hide.gif

Maybe I'm not getting it? She was just saying since you work together you sounded alike? Maybe she's just a crass kind of person and didn't really mean to insult you. I know crass people annoy me sometimes.
 
Thanks for your response.

It wasn't the "sounding alike" remark that I was mad about it was the one where she said "well you know how owners start looking like their dogs...and people who work together start sounding alike."

Am I being too sensitive. Maybe because of all the other remarks she makes I may be overly sensitive to this one:eek:
 
I have thought about this post for about 15 minutes, because I don't want to give you the wrong advice, but this is all I could come up with.
I know someone who is always jabbing me when she gets the chance. I ignore her. Not because I want to be the better person, because that is the right thing. No. I don't dig back because it makes her more mad because then she knows she didn't get to me. And on top of all that, I am nice to her. Pretend there isn't a problem in the world. Completely drives her insane. But really, why do I need to respond? I don't need to validate myself to someone who is trying to bring me down, especially about something that makes me feel so good about myself and builds my self-esteem. Really, when you think about it I feel bad for her. You have to be pretty unhappy and insecure to want to bring those around you down.
Have a better day, I hope!
 
Take it from the queen of sensitivity...I don't think there was any nastiness in that remark. Obviously I wasn't there, but in reading what you wrote, I hear that saying all the time, mostly about how married couples start to "resemble" each other after years together. Not so much they resemble each other, or dogs for that matter, but people who are around each other a lot start to adapt each other's behaviors. Even some co-workers because of the amount of time you sometimes spend together.

JMO, I think from what it sounds like, that was not a "dig" but I'm sure she's good at them!
Brandi
 
If she's 30 lbs overweight, she needs your sympathy. She is probably projecting her own lack of self-worth, self-esteem, and self-control toward you by her "digs". Let her digs and her harmless remark roll off you like water on a duck's back. Channel your frustration into power for your workouts and commitment to your healthy lifestyle. Most people who do not lead healthy lifestyles just don't "get it".

~ Kim

"Welcome the challenge...Embrace it...Don't fear it." -Cathe Friedrich
 
Hi, I don't see anything offensive either. She wasn't referring to anyone's looks just making an analogy to a frequently used line about dogs and owners looking alike ...that if you hang around together for a long time, you start to resemble each other in some way. In your case, you and your co-worker may sound alike. Don't be offended.
 
Thanks for all of your responses!! I guess sometimes you need objective opinions and step back from the situation.

That's what I like about this board. Everyone shares a common interest (fitness) and is so supportive.

Thanks again for your input!;-)
 
Another thing I thought about is that she couldn't use the "resemble" line about you and her, (because she wants to lose weight and you don't need to) so she had to use the "sounding alike" comment instead.

Just a thought. I'm glad you feel better about it now. :)
 
I'm with Dani on that one, don't see any offense in what she was saying. Sounds like she was just trying to be funny.
 
I probably wouldn't have taken total offensive to the remark but it sounds like she has said other things to tick you off.
Some people are just jealous.She may not be jealous of how you look but more of the fact that you have the motivation to look the way you do and by the sounds of it, she doesn't have much motivation. She may resent you for that.And after years of dieting she is probably just mad with herself.
Lori:)
 
While I agree with the other ladies that I don't think her intentions were to be nasty, I understand that you may have been offended by that. I have had situations where I've said something as a joke and had it taken all wrong. Fortunately the lady that I offended immediately asked me into her office and told me how it made her feel. I apologized and let her know that it was meant as a joke and I certainly didn't mean to insult her. I have been much more aware of what is and is not acceptable since then and we get along great now.

My suggestion to you is to do what this lady did for me. She let me know that my comments weren't as funny to her as they were to me. Not everyone has the same sense of humor. Many MANY people don't "get" sarcasm and take it in a manner that it's not intended.

I worked with this man a few years ago that was the most sarcastic person I met. He was also brilliantly quick with a joke and one of the funniest people I've ever met. Many people thought he was mean and didn't find him funny at all. It's like how some people think Monty Python is stupid, but that Howard the Duck is the funniest movie ever made. (That was an ex-boyfriend of mine. I never understood that one.)

And I hope by that last example, you don't think that I think you have no sense of humor - I was just being extreme.
 
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