Okay, I need a little advice & feedback

catwoman

Cathlete
I apologize up front if this gets a little long. I want to make sure to include enough information.

You all don't know me from Jane, except that I post here and work out to Cathe, but let me just say that I am an exceptionally hard worker. I take great pride in doing a good job, and prefer to be super-busy rather than have nothing to do.

With that said, I get to work every single day (for the past year and a half since I started this job) an hour early. I'm not supposed to start until 8:00, but I am here by 7:00, on average. It just works out better with the drive I make from home, so I get here early. I also eat lunch at my desk, and most of the time, I work through part of my lunch. Now, unless I'm asked to do this, I never write it down as overtime. I don't think that would be fair when it is my decision to do this.

Used to, I was virtually the only admin my department had, so I was always busy -- very very busy. But we had some personnel changes and my responsibilities shifted to a point where while I report to more people, my workload was virtually cut by 1/2 to 2/3. To make the problem worse, the admin they brought in to assist is not a team player. She will be swamped with work and won't let me help her. I spoke to her boss about this, because she seemed to be a snit about me for something, and he even acknowledged that this woman was not a team player. He actually used the words, "selfish" and "controlling" with regard to how she views her job and her work...but she's good at what she does...she just doesn't want to play on a team.

So, this leaves me to sit with very little to do half the day, and it's driving me nuts. Since I get here so early, I decided that I would start leaving early since I have so little to do. I always go around and ask if anyone needs anything about a half hour before I leave, but no one ever needs anything.

Additionally, I recently have had a run of bad luck, so to speak. I had dental work that my dentist just couldn't get right, so I was constantly having to leave work to go back to the dentist to have them correct what they'd done. My husband had a couple of health problems that I had to leave work for, as well. On top of everything, I suffer generalized anxiety, which usually manifests itself by making me feel sick when I have nothing to do. It's weird, but when I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, I feel great, but as soon as I sit twiddling my thumbs for any length of time, I start having "spells". I get dizzy or nauseous, or my stomach starts cramping up, or I just start feeling generally sick. I'll have to leave work or stay home for a few hours in the morning until the feeling passes. At any rate, since my workload has lessened up so severely since about November of last year, I've been having more and more of these episodes and have missed more work than normal (an hour or two here or there). My anxiety hits me this way because I begin to stress and feel guilty that I have nothing to do, and then the anxiety attack happens.

Well, I've been working on getting my anxiety under control, but today, on the way to work, my driver's side visor broke and it will now only hang straight down in front of my face. I have to crouch to see under it so I can see the road. That or I have to hold it up. Neither option is good, so I decided to take it in to my dealership to fix this afternoon, since I have nothing better to do at work. I mean, I've been going around the department, asking people if they have something for me to work on, but they don't. So, I shot off a short message to my four managers and the other departmental admin, explaining the problem and that I would like to leave early to take it for repairs. I ended my message as I always do, "...please let me know if this presents a problem and I will try to make other arrangements."

So, I bustle around to get done what little work I do have so nothing is hanging undone when I leave. As I normally do, I checked my boss's email (it's part of my job, and I do it a few times a day), and lo and behold...there was a message from one of my other managers to my boss about my message to leave early. It seems that my boss was the one who actually initiated the message to this manager, and it read: "If Europe was as creative at coming up with excuses not to be in the office (or leave early), we wouldn't have an issue with 'growth.'", to which my manager replied, "Agree..."

I was understandably very upset about this message and have decided to immediately begin seeking employment elsewhere. I can not work for someone who does not respect me or trust me. What's really sad is that I have requested time with both of these men on several occasions to discuss what is expected of me and for feedback, and to just discuss my concerns (because I had a few before this little message was sent this morning). As recently as Wednesday, I requested time with my manager to discuss my recent discovery that I suffered from anxiety disorder and to make him aware that this has been my problem for the past few months, but he failed to make time to see me.

I'm only wondering at this point if I have legal recourse of any kind. I mean, the tone of this message made it seem that this is not the first time these two have discussed me in such a negative light. Could this be the reason why my workload has lessened? I have lots of questions that will likely never be answered, but I can't function efficiently in such an environment. I do know that from this point forward, until I find a new job, I will not start work before 8:00am, and I will no longer work through any part of my lunch. My efforts have not been appreciated, and this completely baffles me, but I will take that time for me from now on. I know that at least I will appreciate it.

Thank you all for your time,
Signed,
One very sad, upset, and frustrated catwoman.
 
You might have legal recourse w/an anxiety disorder. In NJ this would be considered a disability, & you could sue them for harassment and/or discrimination. Unfortunately the feds do not classify this disorder as a disability, so it would be up to your state department of labor.

NJ is a pretty progressive state when it comes to protecting the little guy. Our law is NJLAD--NJ Law Against Discrimination. Check w/your state DOL & see if they have something similar.
 
All I can say is that I am sorry you are going through this. Sounds like your hard work is not appreciated and I would look elsewhere for employment myself.
I can tell you that I appreciate you (((HUGS))) You always have such a way with words and you are extremely kind and helpful on this forum.
Just do some stuff for yourself tonight and then think about this all later.


Charlotte~~
 
I quit a job working for horrible people in November. Since that time, I have picked up part time work, I sleep better, don't cry as much, and am generally happier.

I'm not sure about what legal recourse you have. I do know your job is making you sick. Brush up your resume and get it out there. Now. Don't wait.

I'm so sorry your are going through this. All I can say is I've been there and it makes your whole life unpleasant.

Keep us posted.

Margaret
 
I'll be blunt - that totally sucks and you shouldn't have to put up with it. ** deep breath **

I understand that most managers are only concerned with the bottom line but we are all only human and nobody's life runs perfectly 100% of the time. They should be trained to be flexible and understanding, particularly if an employee is upfront and honest and has been a valuable contributor to the company.

I went through something somewhat similar. Here's my advice: Document everything you possibly can. Emails, correspondence, meeting requests, etc. and schedule a meeting with your human resource representative. This should not go on your record until your side is heard. They may or may not be able to do something for you but at least it will be on record.

Then,undoubtedly, look for another position somewhere else. Life is WAY too short to feel the way you do. You CAN find a position where your talents are appreciated and your hard work acknowledged.

You may have a discrimination case regarding your condition but you need to ask yourself if you really want to put yourself through that. It could be very expensive to pursue and also cause you more anxiety. The first consultation with an attorney is usually free so you would have nothing to lose by asking.

Good luck and stay healthy!!!

Angie
 
Can you still make a copy of the E-mail? It would really help if you want to take this somewhere. I live in California and I agree that if you have some sort of disorder, mental or physical, you can use this legally. Also, can you get fmla for this? I was getting up to 480 hours per year off because of a bladder disorder. The hours off do not work against your benefits and it is useful for legal issues. Good luck!
 
How unappreciative these people are, catwoman! It sounds like you work in a very hostile environment, which I might also describe as "toxic".

I would take the bull by the horns. First of all, lose all guilt. Remember, as long as you are getting all of your work done, it doesn't really matter at all how many hours you spend outside the office. In fact, timing your personal chores around your work schedule is an indication of devotion, maturity and responsibility. If you left the office at a time when there was nothing to do, that just shows that you're an efficient planner, the kind any normal boss would love to have working for him. You should NOT feel that you have neglected your job.


Next, draft a memo to your boss stating that you've tried several times to arrange a meeting with him but he has not been available, so you are writing this memo that he can review at his leisure. State in the memo that since the reorganization, you haven't had enough to do. State that you have consistently tried to obtain more work and have failed.

Specifically mention all of the projects that you have completed to highlight that you get all your work done. Make a long, descriptive list if possible. Show how much you've accomplished. State that you thought that you should bring this issue to his attention, that you can handle more work and are available to take on more work, and point out how much more you handled before the reorg.

I would NOT mention your nervous condition. True, mentioning it will put them on notice and if the ADA covers it, it will begin to apply upon notice. But it's not a way to foster good relationships, and you don't need any excuses for your perfectly acceptable behavior. Why go there? Many people feel better when they're busy.

Get the memo out ASAP. CC the other boss if it's appropriate. CC anyone who is appropriate to have on the cc list.

Stand up for yourself! You sound like a great employee, and you should NOT let these idiots get you down.

(BTW, their emailing each other may conceivably be part of an attempt to create a "record" to show that you were dismissed for "cause", which would mean that they would avoid having to pay your unemployment, when in fact there is just less work to do and they need to scale back their staff. If such were the case it would be absolutely despicable, but it's something to keep in mind.)

Let us know how it goes!

-Nancy
 
I don't know how old you are but if you are 40+ you could pursue an age discrimination case. Be very careful about revealing your nervous condition, it sounds like you were a highly productive employee with or without this condition.

Good luck and yes, it sucks....

--Lois

"Don't forget to breathe!"
 
I would do what Nancy said ASAP. Good luck and so sorry for all you are going through.
Angela
 
Thanks everybody!

Just to note:

1) I did print a copy of the email. (I'm no dummy -- :) )
2) I have been documenting quite a few things - a little voice started telling me quite a while back I'd better start documenting my time, so I did. I also created what I called my "toot-my-own" file, which showcased some of my accomplishments within my job.
3) The other admin in the department is a temp, and she told me early on that she's always wanted a job in the company where I work. I've also felt all along that she's been out for my job since the very beginning. I know she belittles me, but until now, I thought I worked with mature enough people who would see what what she's doing. At least I thought they saw it...maybe I was wrong.
4) I've set the ball in motion to meet with my HR representative. He actually took a half day today, so I'll have to wait until Monday to talk to him.
5) I know my boss and the other manager had no idea that I would see that email.

At any rate, I came home tonight, did a killer abs workout and then attacked Lowmax! Nothing like doing something good for the bod when the bod needs some good, huh?

Taking the bull by the horns, I've pulled out all my old staffing contacts' business cards, and quite ironically, I just updated my resume and wrote a cover letter for an assignment for the class I'm taking right now. So, that's all ready to go. My resume is in quite good shape. I also talked to my husband about adding me to his insurance (we currently hold separate insurance because we're newly married and it worked out better financially) just in case I have to take some temp assignments until a permanent one comes along.

I will definitely work on putting together a memo over the weekend, in an effort to put down in writing my "side", if you will.

For the record, I am 35.

Again, thanks everybody. Hopefully, I'll land in a new and wonderful position soon!
 
One last thing: I wouldn't so much say it is a hostile work environment so much as it is an indifferent one. Three of my managers usually just try to brush me off or ignore me. Apparently, I am not worthy of their time. So, I guess my biggest complaint is that I have felt "dismissed" since the personnel changes took effect late last year. I haven't felt important or that people actually care about me. Most of all, I don't feel appreciated. I'll work for just about anyone and for lower salary as long as I feel appreciated, but the highest salary in the world isn't worth it to me if I'm not appreciated.
 
HI Catwomen,

I haven't really any advice b/c I don't know any legal details. I just want to add that I HATE when people work so hard (including myself) and it goes unnoticed.There is nothing worse then feeling invisable and in order to get a "job well done", you pretty much have to take tolit paper and wipe someones backside!
I recently was working 2 jobs. The first job I had been working at for 7 years and the boss I had was AWFUL. She had so many of her own problems that she would complain about everything else.She was just miserable! The more you did, the more you were expected to do.And you never got a "good job" or "thanks" for that matter. I got tired of her and her ways so I found my second job ,which unfortunatley was only part-time.My boss there was great. He always said "thanks for comming in...good job" I felt apperciated.
I then wanted to get out of my first job entirely and tell my boss where to stick it.So I had to find a full-time job (which is where I am now) and I had to leave my other job as well. 2 jobs would have killed me.
I do my work here, the best I can b/c I am only knew there are alot of things I don't know. Right now, my duties are just basic. I do my work on night shfits and then I get my cross stitch out. Night shifts are from 6:30- 8 in the morning. I recently found out that one of my co-workers (not my boss) was complaining about me cross stitching at night. She doesn't see me do it, nor does it interfer with my work.So why would it bother her? B/c she wants to cause truoble.
I decided to take the cross stitch home and do what everyone else does on their night shifts and thats sleep.
I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.Everyone as problems in the workforce. I have decided to let the issue slide until she says something else. The other reason it bothered me was b/c I am sooooo easy to get along with. I have taken over time shifts and gotten them out of binds b/c they have no part-timer.
As long as my boss is happy, Im o.k.I just don't know why she didn't mind her own business. People can be so mean.
Lori
 
Thanks for the story, Lori.

I have worked with some really awful people in the past. I used to put up with it for too long, as well. I stayed in one job for 5 years, and the last two were some of the most miserable of my life. I had another job that kicked my anxiety disorder into overdrive (I can look back now and know that it was anxiety disorder that was afflicting me). Both these jobs were horrible! I learned from those experiences that I would never allow myself to stay in such an environment as that ever again. It's not worth the health consequences. It's just a job...it's not my life. True, the job market is tight right now, but it's not that tight! I'll find something better!
 

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