need words of wisdom at a tough time

[Rockael]

Dearest Ann, I am so very sorry, I also lost my precious Mom last year on September 22nd 2006. She is and was my Hero.
I will tell you that it never gets any better,or easier. You only
become to realize that you can not call them and speak with them.
I think about my Mom everyday. It hurts today as bad as it hurt when she left. I hate to visit that place because I feel so empty. My Mom was my best girlfriend. My rolemodel,she gave me any confidence in which I have. She was the most unselfish person I have ever known.
I could go on and on about her.
But I will tell you I found Cathe and all of you people. This has helped me get through my life so much better.
I focused on Cathe's workouts and I am so grateful to her that I do wish that I could tell her what she has meant to me. My mom knew that I exercised, and would much approve that I get up and do it.
I did lay in bed for a very long time. I still do sleep as long as I can. I still have a hard time believing that she is gone.
I will not let my Moms life be in vain and I want to make her proud of me. That people will say what a wonderful Mom she must of had.
I want to continue doing things like she did, like care about the less fortunate and homeless people.etc. I reflect on my Mom's life constantly and have tried to change more things about myself.
Even my relationships with my siblings have changed.
May God pour his blessings upon you with each day. Again I am so sorry for your loss.
I think that it is okay to exercise, it really is.
Anything that gets you through in a positive way.
Take Care & God Bless.
Rocky
;-)

 

[jjswimmom]

Ann,

If only I could find the right words to help. I can say I also lost my mom March 29, 2007 this year. I too was working out 6 days a week before then, but have struggled to get back into a routine since for many reasons. I am full of excuses, so I "just do it" as Nike would say. I find the "easier" workouts are a good place to start. Something that makes you smile. Don't be hard on yourself. It takes a lot of emotional energy to grieve, which also can exhaust you physically. THere is such a mind/body/spirit connection and we need to honor that. Take good care of yourself. Finding a grief support group really helped me. It was offered through hospice in our community. It was a great place to talk about my mom and hear other's struggles. No one can truly understand what you are going through but yourself.

You ask, how do you get back up after being knocked down? Remember, it is a process. Like a tunnel. You cannot go around, over or under your grief. You must go through it. So cry when you feel like it and do what you can each day. My sister told me the most beautiful thing the other day when I told her I felt like I no longer have a "soft place" to fall when I feel down, as moms always have a way to make us feel better. My sister said, "Oh yes you do Janet. You fall into the arms of Jesus." How true. I don't know where you are in your faith, but that really helped me. We always have a soft place to fall in HIM.

As far as the exercise goes, remember your committment to yourself and your health. Your mom would want you to take good care of yourself. I liked what Cindy suggested with the 5 minutes. I know it is just getting started on those 5 minutes, but you will get there when you are ready. Take it slow and you WILL get back on the exercise wagon again!

Oh, and on a lighter note, I had 2 Pembroke Welsh Corgis years ago. We loved them! Do you breed Corgis? Best to you and take it one day at a time. It does get better. There will not be a day that you will not think about your Mom, but you will savor her memories and feel the joy in your life again. And exercise gives you endorphins, remember? We need more of those today!

 

[gettingfitmom]

Ann, I just lost my father to cancer 4 weeks ago. My siblings and I were there when he passed away. (along w/ my mother). He was ready, and his acceptance made it easier on us all. At my lowest times, I tried to keep myself busy as to not think about my loss. I took walks w/ my kids, by myself and slowly just statred to get back in the swing of things. What helped me is being able to talk to my mom and to know that SHE is doing ok. I like to think that my dad would want all his kids to continue on. Like my Pastor told me, grief is like the ocean, a wave will knock you down, but then there is a calm in between. I've had quite a few waves in the last few weeks, and I know there will be more to come. Hang in there, it gets better and remember, everyone grieves differently, there is no set rules. Take care and my prayers are w/ you!!!!!!!!!! Take care, Kay