May I vent please

L Sass

L Sass

Cathlete
It's about family and friends who know you're committed to fitness, and then ask a question only to ridicule or belittle you. Why is that?

I find I can relate to all of you BECAUSE you have that committment. And the recent threads about secrecy and mommy-dom come into play here. I know that as "mommy", my kids (7, 4, and 1) and therefore family are much better when I exercise - and my children and husband know it too. In that vein, the roadtrip with you all was the BEST thing I've ever done "for me". I think it was beyond description, but it was so becasue of my committment to fitness. I think (and forgive me if this sounds arrogant) that committment lies at a whole different level than the average ordinary person who doesn't exercise or eat clean with an awareness of nutrition can ever understand. Do you all agree with that?

And I get so angry when family (in particular my sister and my SIL who are both quite large with poor eating habits, high cholestoral, etc.) ask me about the road trip or my working out, only to come back with a snide remark about how "video workouts aren't really working out" or there are much better things that qualify as "the best they've ever done for themselves". I don't think they intend to sound condescending, but it really makes me just want to go workout harder, and never get into another fitness discussion with them. I'll just keep my mouth shut around them, and really enjoy my discussions with you all. Thanks for being here.

Lorrie
 
Lorrie -

I couldn't agree with you more. I have found that around people who "live to eat" where my philosophy is "eat to live", they get very indignent about how you're a "party pooper" and things such as that. Makes me very angry. I work with a lot of people who are continuously riduculing and trying to sabatoge my healthy eating and exercising habits.

The company I work for is wonderful, but on occassions such as "Administrative Professionals Day" and holidays they feel the need to show their appreciation with food!!! I've always voiced my opinion about that. If you REALLY appreciate what I do for you then show yours by doing something with meaning and not just thinking that food is a way of saying "thanks."

Wow - I feel like I've vented too!!!

Thanks!
Dianne
 
Lorrie, the next time you are going to be around your sister and SIL, make sure you take one of your Cathe DVD's with you (say KPC since you don't need any additional equipment). That way when they comment that "video workouts aren't really working out" you can challenge them. }(

I'm sorry that you have to deal with such nonsense. I usually keep my mouth shut around people like that b/c no matter what you say, they know it all!
 
Lorrie: good for you for taking care of yourself. My kids are 7,4 and 2 so I know what your life is like. When people make comments like that I find it so laughable that I really don't take them seriously. I am glad you have a place you can talk about stuff like this. Keep up the good work, and you are taking away everyone's excuses for not taking care of themselves and not looking good...including other moms!

Jen
 
I just wanted to add a comment about the "food thing." It's a constant battle (and drives me a little crazy) that every time there's a holiday or kid-celebration it's ALWAYS about candy.

Kids. Candy.

If my kids go to a birthday party, they always come home with a bag of candy. I let my kids trade it in for a new Lego building set. Thankfully, they love the idea. :)

And then there's Halloween ... We started going to the Harvest Party at our church, instead. Lots of games and fun, hayrides ... not just going begging for a monstrous bag candy. Candy, candy, candy. Ugh.

Marla
 
Lorrie, they're just jealous & guilty b/c they don't have the discipline, plus they're probably fat & sloppy & generally don't feel good about themselves. What else can you do but pity them?
 
I think we might have the same family. . . Most members of my immediate family have a horrible attitude towards exercise and health (and considering the number of people in our family who have died from cancer and heart disease, it never ceases to amaze me!). They always seem to get in a snide comment or two about me working out. Just this weekend one asked me if the reason I worked out so much was because I hated my body. Sheesh. They eat junk, buy into every cheesy diet scam that comes along and continue to gain weight. A few weeks ago, when I was visiting my parents, they were scarfing down pastries and talking about how low carb diets worked so well for them-- I literally almost cried! It makes me so sad to see them killing themselves with food (they are both obese).

Didn't mean to take over your thread-- all this to say, I understand completely!
 
When things like this happen, I like to let the results do the talking. I put on a tank top, so everybody can see my biceps and shoulders and I make sure to wear shorts that show the lack of cellulite in my calves!

Most of my friends and family don't say too much, because they don't want to be challenged to a 5-mile run!!!

After years of working out, I have come to the realization that nobody else wants to hear how hard I work to look the way that I do. It makes them feel bad because they don't do anything for exercise. So I just keep my mouth shut and show off my results whenever the opportunity presents itself!!!

Whenever I was around large people (many of my friends and my husband's entire family) I used to feel self conscious about being healthy and being a reasonable weight. I kind of felt bad for "not being fat". I have gotten over that and I hope that I can be a good example for them, although I know that they would NEVER be willing to work as hard as I do, even if you could promise them the same results! They can NOT relate to doing workout videos and they will never understand it (believe me I have tried for 8 years and even my husband can't comprehend the dedication). If they ever ask me about exercise or training, they only ask if I am training for any races right now. That is as much as they can understand. Usually I am not training for any particular race, so I guess I should have some witty response about training for "life."

Sometimes however, I find myself belittling the efforts of others (in my head). Like when my SIL was excited because she walked something like a mile and a half while her son was at baseball practice. While outwardly I encouraged her, inside I was thinking "Big Deal, you walked a mile and a half, try running 5."

Just some thoughts, I guess I needed to vent as well.

Tina
 
Oh, I just love this statement "video workouts aren't really working out". HA!

A friend of mine is a manager at a local gym, and he's in tip-top shape. However, he said he's awed by Cathe and her crew. He was like "These ladies are kicking butt. I probably wouldn't make it through 1/4 of any of the cardio workouts and would probably have to lift lighter to make it through any of her other dvds." I showed him Bootcamp and all he could say was "wow".

Most people who don't work out are shoulda, coulda, wouldas. You should...if I wanted to I could...if it weren't for this then I would...

You hit the nail on the head..."commitment". I'm not a mom and I'm not married and making the commitment for me sometimes a struggle. So you guys that have families and still manage to keep this commitment make me say "wow."

Keep doing what you do, maybe some day something may rub of on one of these ladies, hopefully before they end up in some type of health crisis and have do it as a reaction instead of a pro-active approach to healthy living. Plus you are teaching your kids early in life what healthy living is. It's much harder to learn this after you've become an adult.
 
See - I knew I could count on you all. YOU do know what I'm talking about. And Dana - that suggestion about a Cathe workout challenge. Great idea, but I went it even one better. Sometime ago an friend of mine copied (wrong, I know) HSTA. I have an old DVD player and it wouldn't play on it - so I bought my own. But for anyone who has a newer DVD player, the copied one would probably work. I took it to my mom's house yesterday and offered to give it to either sis or SIL. At the same time, KPC was on Fit TV. I showed them KPC and re-offered HSTA to them both. That's when I got the "videos aren't really working out" lines. AAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!

So in a nut shell, it sounds as if we all have basically the same extended families - maybe that's why we're so comfortable chatting here. Thanks for letting me vent ladies - you're the best!!:)

Lorrie
 
It's already been said, but I agree. They're jealous. You are committed and work hard. They don't want to work as hard as you and so belittle your accomplishments. You should be proud of yourself and ignore them. Just give a little smile and shrug your beautiful shoulders when they get started.
 
Lorrie,

I hear you on the fact that my family is better when I exercise too. My kids ages are (7,5,2). I get mad too when people make excuses for not working out. I get up between 5-6A almost every day to get my work out done and out of the way before the troops get up.

I agree with whomever said to give them your video when they say "video work outs aren't really working out".

I do think that it sounds like jealousy on your SIL's part.

Sorry you have to experience that.

Dallas
 
Hey Lorrie! I agree with you 100% and you have every reason to be fusterated with them! All I can say is if you could put them in front of a Cathe workout and get them to do it and THEN have them tell you that it is not really working out! I know that will never happen, but can you picture it! It makes me smile just thinking of someone I know who thinks video workouts are not worth it. If she did a Cathe, she wouldn't walk in weeks! LOL!
I do agree with the others, it may be a jealousy thing, because obviously they "ARE" working for you and you show that in your overall health.
 
ask me about the road trip or my working
>out, only to come back with a snide remark about how "video
>workouts aren't really working out"

This comment always gets me. No one has ever said it to me, but there have been several posters who have been on the receiving end of similar remarks.

I say set up a workout time for you and them to do one of Cathe's workouts together. THEN see if they still say that video workouts aren't really working out.

The only way video workouts aren't working out is if you just sit on the sofa watching them! The quality of a workout doesn't depend on where it's from (a video, a book), but on the amount of commitment you put into it.
 
Just this weekend one asked me if the
>reason I worked out so much was because I hated my body.
>Sheesh.
They've been watching too many Lifetime movies on exercise bulemia!
I'd say "no, I exercise because I love my body, and its the only one I've got, so I want to keep it working well."
 
I hear ya!

I agree with those who said to "let your results speak for themselves". That's what I do EVERY Thanksgiving get together. HA! It never fails, but as I eat a protein bar about 30 min before the TG meal, I get the "speech" from the out-of-town relatives. Then, as I pick up only the white meat turkey, and a few low glycemic sides (I usually end up making those!), I get the "looks". hehe And as I'm a sucker for cranberries, I really have to limit myself to about a tablespoon, and then prepare for all the comments. lol But I try to pick my battles, and let it slide. I mean, how much can you really say about a Healthy Life Style, to those who smoke packs of ciggies a day, and think there's only one type of fish: FRIED! :p (my relatives are from the south). So, when I hear things such as "why can't you relax on the Holidays? You're already too skinny! Why can't you eat food like normal people???", I just grin, slightly pull up my top and show them my abs. The comments usually stop there. Unless of course, it's my aunt, who usually says "girls shouldn't have muscles like that! Men need something to hold on to!". ugh!!!

See my point? Sometimes, you just have to let it go. There are some people who just will never understand. lol
 
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