I'm really annoyed at my best friend

[sunnyside]

I think you should stay out of it. It's not worth losing a friendship. Her intentions (although to quick on the draw) were good. She already bought/rescued the dog from the pet shop. Maybe you can bring that issue up and educate her at a later time.;-)

Taking the puppy away now, may also upset the Mom. She's probably fighting to be attached to it, but she may already be.

Shih Tzu's are great little dogs and she'll love it and it'll be her best friend, eventually.

 

[red_mct]

Laura, do you think maybe you feel so emotional about it because of Cosmo being in not-great-health at the moment? It does sound like you are projecting a little bit. I think your friend just probably wanted her mom to feel better (and I bet the puppy is really cute).

Hope you are feeling better,
Marie

 

[LauraMax]

Well, what I think is that having both dogs, being the same exact age, going through life threatening illnesses, has made me bond much more with her mom over the last few weeks. We've run into each other at the vet a couple times, checked in on each other over the last few weeks, kind of shared our woes. So I guess what I'm feeling is empathy. If I had to put Cosmo down & less than a week later Stacey or someone else I'm close to showed up at my door with a new puppy I'd have a breakdown for sure.

Maybe I'm projecting future feelings? I don't know. I guess I just feel like it was the wrong thing to do, especially given that her mother had already told her not to do it. (BTW, I don't know if I mentioned this, but they do live together--the 2 of them--not to mention 5 cats & 1 dog--in this tiny little house the same size as mine!)

I just don't get why she couldn't have honored her mother's wishes & waited a few weeks.

 

[lilmo]

Laura,

I just had to have my 15 year old cat put to sleep on Saturday. It was sudden and quite dramatic. And I am in NO WAY ready for another animal. If DH brought a kitten in tomorrow, I know in my heart I would never give it a fair chance. I would always compare it to Molly, who was my perfect furry best friend for 15 years. I'm sure it would grow on me after a while, but it would never be "right", if you know what I mean.

I agree with others that this is one opinion/way of dealing with the grief and that you should probably keep your thoughts to yourself. If you really feel the need to, and your friendship is one that can hold up to a little tension, you could gently ask your friend a few questions to determine her motivations. If she was truly concerned for her mother and wanted to help, then you can (again gently) express your concerns. Her mother is clearly not bonding with and, from what you described, is rejecting the puppy that (she feels) was forced on her. That is not fair to mom or the puppy.

 

[seeking_guns]

Laura,
I can see why you would be annoyed. She asked for your advice, which was to wait a while -- clearly, the reasonable thing to do in this situation -- and then she disregarded it. Even so, I do agree with those who said to let it go. It's best left between mother and daughter.

-cathy

 

[carmenelectra]

ok i guess i totally gleemed over the part where the mom said she didnt want another pet - that is def a little hurtful then. if that was my friend who did that and she truly did cherish animals i would most def ask her why she got the pup when her mom said not to and does she realize that it prolly hurt her mom. That is just the kind of relationship I have with some of my friends tho so all may not agree. It doesnt have to be a fight or an end to a relationship but at least then u may get some light shed on the reasoning and may be able to put some anger to rest.


@ Mona - I am so sorry for your loss - it seems to get harder and harder for me to lose a pet after every one.:-(