I hate the pressure of shopping for other people!

R

red_mct

Cathlete
I generally like Christmas, but I feel SO pressured when shopping for other people. Specifically, in my SO's family's grab-bag, I pulled his aunt's name. He cackled when he saw this because apparently she is notoriously difficult to buy for. She suggested a "costume watch" which was then further clarified by my SO's mother that it should be thin, have numbers and not "sticks," and not be of the bangle type. Now, this woman is over 60, over six feet tall, and pretty thin. I personally think she'd look really fab in some chunky jewelry, but that's just me.

The final blow is that the grab-bag limit is $30-$35 and they really frown on anything much over or under. UGH!

So, after looking at thousands and THOUSANDS of watches on the Internet- I do not even put this much effort into stuff for my own parents!!! - I ended up picking the following. Granted, it's not really thin BUT it does have the freaking numbers, so I thought that was a good compromise.

http://www.overstock.com/cgi-bin/d2.cgi?page=proframe&prod_id=1671696&AK=1

Someone PLEASE tell me you'd love if I gave you this watch for Christmas!

Marie
 
Marie - I would love getting that watch for Christmas and I'm not even just saying that. It's lovely:)

I, too, hate buying gifts for people I rarely see and don't know well. I also resent spending that money when I could use it towards buying gifts for people I LOVE to buy for.
 
Marie,

I feel your pain and I feel the same way-I do love the watch and I would be thrilled to get this watch for Christmas!!!

Lisa
 
I hear ya! We have, for the most part, stopped buying for anyone other than the kids. We have come to the conclusion that basically if there is something we really want, we'd just prefer to buy it ourselves - which goes for our parents too. It's at the point now where we just seem to be swapping gift cards:D Seems pretty silly and it kind of ruins the whole Christmas spirit. I would much prefer to just donate to the humane society or toys for tots.

As for the watch, it is lovely. I would suggest however, that you try to find out if she would prefer a leather band as opposed to a link type band. If she's fine with a leather band, I think you have a hit! ;)
 
I don't think its worth agonizing over. I buy gifts that I would like to receive and if the person on the recieving end doesn't like it, there is nothing I can do. It's mostly the thought that counts anyways-- I think that holidays should not revolve around giving the best gifts. Just my 2 cents.
 
Marie, honey, this is your hubby's auntie here. You got the right idea but I think I'd like a different style. Keep on shopping and I'll check back in with you later!

Hugs and Kisses,

Aunt Martha

}( just kidding hahaha!...but seriously, that's a nice watch, you have good taste! Bella
 
I like that watch, plus, despite the price tag, it's a "schmancy" watch name!!! My husband is a watch fanatic, and he likes Lucian Picard watches. It's a lovely one and a great price!
 
It is a nice watch. This may sound snide, but maybe she should pick the watch out herself and give it to you to wrap and give back to her. I guess I don't think people should be given that much information about a grab bag gift or any gift for that matter. Melissa
 
Marie,

Look at it this way: you were very lucky to pick the name of a woman. I find shopping for women so much easier than shopping for men. For a woman, you can always buy some cosmetics, like a body lotion set, or a scarf or gloves or a cosmetics bag.

In my opinion, although I like the watch, jewelry is a hard gift to buy for someone you don't know well, because taste is such a personal thing. Also, there are those awkward times when you see her, when she knows you're looking to see if she's wearing the watch, or whether she returned it.

Just an idea: what about a basic pair of dark brown or black leather gloves like these:

http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=210348&CategoryID=11430
They're a kind of useful luxury item that most people can always use more of, and since most people have lots of gloves, you'll never notice if she's wearing them or not.

Just a thought. I do like the watch, though!

Nancy
 
I think the watch is lovely and I would be happy to get it. Secondly, Christmas is about giving. If this woman at the age of 60 has not realized that it's the thought that counts and it's more the act of showing love and appreciation than the gift itself then the whole meaning of Christmas is lost. I would get the watch and give it in the spirit that it was meant to be given. Worrying about it and causing yourself undo sress and pressure is a waste of energy.
 
I feel for your gift buying conundrum, Marie!! I was lucky enough this year to draw my sister's name, and was so thankful and relieved!! She's easy for me to buy for, and I have alot of fun shopping for her.

I love that watch you chose, and think your SO's aunt (and rest of the family) would be foolish not to love it too!! Great job! Now enjoy the fact that it's over with and focus on the more enjoyable parts of the holiday. ;)

Connie :)
 
Marie, I FEEL for you!!! Gifts alone has made me absolutely DREAD Christmas. I think that what makes it so difficult is the expectations and obligations x( Every year, DHs family draws names and until this year the limit has been $50... yep, you read that right, fifty big ones and every single one of us lives on very tight budgets except for one of the sisters - the one who calls the shots. This year DH finally put his foot down and had the limit lowered to $25. This year, he got that sister's name (and is he MAD! she is just like so's aunt) and I got my favorite sil - she is such a grateful and giving woman, so I am really excited to get her name! :D I wish that we could just get rid of drawing names altogether and give to who we want because they are in our hearts. DH is just getting his sister what he wants even though she has a list a mile long. He figures that if she can't see the thought that he put into the gift he chooses for her and doesn't appreciate it and it just ends up on ebay, then she doesn't deserve it. :p

Okay, I am feeling a bit chatty today! ;) About the watch; I like it! :) If she doesn't, then :p on her!

Missy
 
Marie-
The watch is really cool!

I think your title of topic says it all... When "traditions" cause people to "hate" "pressure" I say its time for a change. Christmas is the spirit of giving love joy..... My DH *HAS TO* do his familys tradition of all the "kids" get gifts... Well let me tell you - 22 "kids" gifts are out of my budget... We see them ONLY at the Xmas party 1x a year. ITS PHOOEY if you ask me and has NOTHING to do w/ Xmas. For my family I buy what/who I want. There are years that I cant do much but whatever it is is done purely out of love. They are thousands of miles away so I'd rather save up for plane tickets anyway.
Dont let in law traditions take away from your joy.... I figure its DHs deal and I make him shop for the 22 childrens gifts every year! That'll teach him- send him to walmart in DEC!!!!}(
 
Marie,

I like the watch. I may purchase one for myself! I do not like to be pressured into buying for others, either. One of the things that helped in my family (we have a very LARGE family) was stopping the name-drawing and buying for a particular person (at least for the adults). Each female brings a gift appropriate for a female and each male brings a gift appropriate for a male--with a limit on the price. We put all the gifts under the tree, marked "male" or "female," and after the kids open their stuff, they pass out the adult gifts. Then we check out other people's gifts and make trades if we want--and have great fun doing it! If anyone does not want to participate, they simply don't bring a gift and don't open one. That way, if you are on a limited budget and/or really don't enjoy the extra shopping, you have an easy out. It works great for us. I realize that many of you are not "in charge" of the gift giving process b/c you are dealing with in-laws, but it's worth a suggestion at the next gathering.

MissL
 
MissL, I absolutely love your Christmas party! We do something like that with our church friends and with my Dad's family... It would be nice to adopt that for DHs family and my Mom; we have HUGE families! :)

Missy
 
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