help...
- Thread starter tygra
- Start date
for twelve years, I've thought he was my soul mate, best friend...we teased about who loved each other more. I don't know him and he's hardly home. Lost his job recently.
when I try to do what he does, or question him about how he can be in a mall for 8 hours, he turns it around on me saying that he was in a good mood, why ruin it, making me feel like the bad person.....and I do!! I don't want anyone mad at me ever...
i want to stay, I want to run.... i want who he was for 11 years and who he was through last May..................
when I try to do what he does, or question him about how he can be in a mall for 8 hours, he turns it around on me saying that he was in a good mood, why ruin it, making me feel like the bad person.....and I do!! I don't want anyone mad at me ever...
i want to stay, I want to run.... i want who he was for 11 years and who he was through last May..................
SirenSongWoman
Cathlete
Honey, he needs help. You can help him get help if he'll allow it but you can't make him better.
LaughingWater
Cathlete
Stacey's right. It sounds like he needs help. I'm sure you'd be willing to work things out with him if he were willing ~ have you asked him? If he isn't, then it may be time to move on. It does neither of you any good to continue in this fashion.
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.
kathryn
Cathlete
I totally agree.
We did see a doctor and he did get a prescription for Lexapro, but only took it for a week so far. Wednesday he said he finally laughed (of course, being out of the house for many hours and lots of times overnight) and was 85 - 90% back to him...then snap again.
I have been supportive and not pushing. I don't want it to be over, I just do not know when you know what to do.
I have been supportive and not pushing. I don't want it to be over, I just do not know when you know what to do.
LaughingWater
Cathlete
Is he in counseling? Have you considered counseling?
I have two loved ones who battle depression. One went to counseling, the other refuses and just cycles. As a supporting family member, I eventually went to my own therapist to learn how to cope. It helped a great deal.
((hug))
I have two loved ones who battle depression. One went to counseling, the other refuses and just cycles. As a supporting family member, I eventually went to my own therapist to learn how to cope. It helped a great deal.
((hug))
I'm sorry to say this but it's time to move on. Is it possible that he already has moved on and not told you about it? There are some classic signs of that. (He's gone for hours at a time, even many times overnight. Blames you for questioning him and bringing him down. He's secretive--you don't know why he lost his job)
Your relationship sounds like it's over, and you're trying to get back what you once had. He may have depression issues, or he could just be unhappy in his life. They aren't the same thing. You have to pull yourself together, let go of the past and move on.
I'm very sorry for what you are going through. It's so hard sometimes to figure out the other half in a relationship. Sending ((((((hugs))))))).
Your relationship sounds like it's over, and you're trying to get back what you once had. He may have depression issues, or he could just be unhappy in his life. They aren't the same thing. You have to pull yourself together, let go of the past and move on.
I'm very sorry for what you are going through. It's so hard sometimes to figure out the other half in a relationship. Sending ((((((hugs))))))).
janiejoey
Cathlete
I'm sorry this is happening to you. I had at one time, a relationship for 13 years that ended. You don't know yet what is happening, but I do know how awful it is when things change.
Support him until you can get more information. You'll have to be patient until then. If you think he may be suicidal then get help for him, but if it's him separating himself from you, you can only wait and see what he does.
Stay close to family and friends, know that things change and can be very hurtful and discouraging, but things always change it never stays the same and most of the time for the better. If he decides to end the relationship, please protect yourself from the aftereffects. Stay close to your family, but most of all see a councilor so you can deal with it and get through this awful time. Please be safe and hang in there. Let us know what happens.
(((((hugs)))))
Janie
Support him until you can get more information. You'll have to be patient until then. If you think he may be suicidal then get help for him, but if it's him separating himself from you, you can only wait and see what he does.
Stay close to family and friends, know that things change and can be very hurtful and discouraging, but things always change it never stays the same and most of the time for the better. If he decides to end the relationship, please protect yourself from the aftereffects. Stay close to your family, but most of all see a councilor so you can deal with it and get through this awful time. Please be safe and hang in there. Let us know what happens.
(((((hugs)))))
Janie