Friend who was nicer when I was fat...

Many, many threads have been put up on this forum regarding the resentment and pushback fit women receive from their less-fit or unfit sisters, and a Cathlete here said it best when she said, in essence, "When you lose weight and get lean through diet and exercise, YOU'RE TAKING THEIR EXCUSES AWAY." That singular sentence totally summarized the genesis of the resentment OP and others have encountered when they are successful in achieving and maintaining a fit physique and lifestyle. Friendships tend to die when that's the dynamic, but in my book, who needs a "friend" who is so hostile to your healthy lifestyle? Shake that kind of dust off your shoes, OP, and keep up the good work.

A-Jock
 
Great advice already, just adding that I've been there too and agree that throwing a question back to them usually disarms them and you'll find out if they are a true friend or if you need to dump them. Life is WAY to short to be around negative people like that who just bring you down. I've definitely pulled the rip cord on a few friendships because of this.

I've said things like this:

"Why are you concerned with my weight?"

"That really hurts my feelings, why would you say something like that to me?"

"I feel amazing, maybe if you started to exercise and eat better you'd feel better too"
 
You know, most friendships do not last forever. We have different friendships for different stages of our lives. Sounds like this one has run its course.

You do not need toxic people in your life, trying to bring you down, when you are on the verge of something new. You could avoid seeing her for a little while and put the ball in her court. If, after a few weeks, she decides she needs and wants you in her life and that maybe you have many things to offer her, like perhaps an exercise plan and encouragement, then leave it up to her inititiate a meeting.

She is the one who loses out when the friendship ends. Meanwhile, your new self will make other acquaintances who suit the you that you are becoming. Time to move on.....

Clare
 

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