eHarmony experiences?

SirenSongWoman

SirenSongWoman

Cathlete
I'm actually thinking about joining because it's impossible to meet men outside my workplace (Oh H*ll no), I work crazy hours (2:00pm to... whenever) and my days off are Tuesday and Wednesday! I thought about Match.com but heard horror stories about married men trolling for single women there. Guys at work are like "I can't believe you don't have a boyfriend..." I tell them I don't bring my personal life into work and they don't know WHAT I have (presumptuous, I swear). But I'm kind of sick of lying just to get the creepy (mostly married or just plain weird) guys at work off my back.

So, has anybody had any experience with eHarmony (pro or con) or know anyone who has? I am trapped by my weird work hours and something has to give... soon.
 
SirenSong, one of my favorite people, Bubbles-The-Nail-Lady who has done my nails for almost 9 years now, signed up for eHarmony about a year ago after being out of a relationship for several years. The first match they found for her was a man who - get this - goes to the same church as she (she was a member of this church for almost 20 years, he for 9) and he also is the sound man for that church. From their first date they were inseparable, and I am now on the Save-The-Date list for their wedding invitations. The way Bubbles (not her real name, of course, but it describes her personality) describes things, they were made for each other.

Certainly there are a lot of good safety guidelines for enrolling in an online matchmaking service, but give it a cautious shot, kid!

A-Jock
 
SirenSong - I've been on and off (mostly off) eharmony for the past couple of years - with no luck meeting someone. Pros - I like that there is a "process" before getting to open communication. You get to know a little more about the person (provided they are truthful) before meeting, which has saved me from meeting some incompatible people. Cons - They matched me with alot of men that weren't even close to meeting some of the criteria that (kids vs. no kids, distance, etc.). I actually have only got to the talking on the phone stage with a couple of guys and then only met one of them. It is a good site, though, I think, for alot of people. I just didn't have any luck with it. I didn't like Match.com AT ALL!! I didn't like the idea of just ANYONE seeing my profile and picture.

Good luck in your search for love! I'm still on the search myself!

Mary
 
How funny, I thought I was the only one who couldn't meet men outside the workplace AND the only one who had tuesday's and wednesday's off....I know what you're going through! I've also maybe possibly considered eharmony....but I think I would go in with no expectations.
 
Hello,

I belonged very briefly, and my experience was that very few people 'matched' me, and NO ONE matched me close by, and I live in a metropolitan area (decent-sized population). The site seems geared to for people who want to find life partners, and to that end, expects you to be willing to relocate across the country.

However, that was a few years ago and maybe the site has more members now. Perhaps your part of the country has more members than mine did, or perhaps, I was just a hard person to find a 'match' for.

I did, however, find the man I will spend the rest of my life with on match.com. :) I can't say I ran into married men trolling for women on match; I did, however, run into men who were just out for sex. x(

That's just one person's experience! I'd say, definitely take the free trial period e-harmony offers, if they still do offer one. Be warned, though,...the initial personality test is loooonngggg!
 
My friend met her husband on eHarmony and has been married very happily for over 5 years now. She did have to relocate to NC from NYS.
 
>I did, however, find the man I will spend the rest of my life
>with on match.com. :) I can't say I ran into married men
>trolling for women on match; I did, however, run into men who
>were just out for sex. x(


I met my sweetie on Match.com as well & we are celebrating our two year "anniversary" this month! I couldn't be happier!

EHarmony is intended to hook you up with a life partner and so the experience is very long and involved. That just wasn't my thing and I wanted to dive right in, so to speak. There are certain things that do disqualify someone in my book & that site made it difficult to disqualify based on certain factors.

Sure, there were guys there that were looking for sex or that were attached and being unfaithful on Match.com but from what I've heard, this happens on all sites. I think that technology lends itself to these things because it is easier to hide on the cheaters end. You just need to be careful & smart when you are involved in internet dating. It is a great way to meet people when you have odd work hours or don't want to meet someone in the course of your employment, but you just need to take that extra step every time to be careful.
 
Hmm. I'm just looking to date unattached men. I don't know about looking for a life partner. I kind of figure if it happens, it happens but... I really don't know exactly what I want for the future, just what I want for right now, you know?

And to the poster off on Tuesday and Wednesday, do you work for the post office, too?!
 
I also tried e-harmony. I did meet a couple of nice men, but didn't find anyone with whom I wanted to continue dating - no real chemistry there I guess. Also, many of the matches I got were located a great distance from me. The closest one that I actually met lives about 90 minutes from me. I started to get a little overwhelmed with all of the matches/e-mails eharmony sent every day as well, but maybe I'm just a little weird that way. :) And whoever said the initial personality test is long is so right!

Overall, I just find it hard to date in general because I'm a single parent to two young children - not much time and I'm totally paranoid about meeting whack-jobs so I might not be the best person to really rate any dating service. :)
 
I have tried the internet dating thing. I tried EH first and now I am on match. I do not think EH matching system worked so well for me. I have had better luck chemistry wise off of match just with people that have contacted me just by scanning my profile and seeing we have things in common. In my opinion after trying both you get a lot more options on match but you also have to do more filtering through people. For example on EH being a 26 year old women if I did not want to date anyone over a certain age EH filtered guys over that age out for me and they never had the opportunity to contact me. However on Match even though I have the age range I am looking for listed in my profile I still get guys old enough to be my father contacting me. I could write a lot of internet dating. I think it has a negative stigma but overall I think it is just another way to met people. You have to treat people on their with caution just like letting any other new person in your life.
 
My sister is about to celebrate her first wedding anniversary with the man she met on eharmony! She was complaining about not meeting anyone, so I gave her some money for her birthday and said, "Go sign up!" Super sweet guy, athletic, smart, great job, good-looking ... it took a couple tries, but she's pretty picky and knows when something's going to work or not. Yes, the questionnaire was extensive, but I think well worth the effort.

About 5 years ago, she dated a lot of guys from match.com but nothing came of that experience.
 
I am believer in when you stop looking they will come. When I finally "gave it up" that is when I met my DH. I just stopped caring or looking and BAM! There he was.;) But I have always been the type that is pretty nonchalant about having a guy, maybe that helped in landing the right one for me. I believe this works though for everyone, when you are not looking the right one just sorta pops up. Strange how life works like that huh?:7

I have found internet dating sites to be tedious and annoying, I mean you can portray yourself anyway you like, so you have to wade through alot of crap before you even find one decent individual. I do however have a friend who met and married her "soulmate" using one of these sites.
 
I DID give up, ages ago, when I was fat and sad (but didn't know it). Then I dropped a lot of weight and changed my hair and interest in me picked up considerably... at work. I'm kind of waking up and wanting to make up for lost time, I suppose }(. I feel like I have a lot to offer but my work schedule is so nuts it's destroying my possibilities. I'm sure I'd be dating now but how do you get anything going when you work Saturday and Sunday, but you're off Tuesday and Wednesday and you never know if you're going to be home at 10:30pm, 12:30am, or 2:30am?

The sudden realization of the tricky situation I'm in all started with The Hot Guy (nope, don't even know his name) who lives two houses down. We check each other out every Tuesday, every Wednesday, and every holiday (!), but I know he's thinking what I'm thinking: 'Could be great but she's never around when I'm around. It'd be doomed so why even get it started.' And I'm thinking 'He's one of those Morning People: Up at dawn, comes home after I go to work, and has been in bed long before I ever get home... except on days when I'm off.'

But, so help me, if Hot Guy comes out of his house SHIRTLESS in the hot sun and starts fiddling around with his Harley one more time I'm jumping him in his front yard.
 
I say give it a shot as well. Like others here, I did the match.com thing and this month is one year that we've been dating. For me, I found it hard to find 'eligible' men to date because I'm a single mom and after a while the first thing I looked for on a guy was wedding ring or no wedding ring. So it was easier, FOR ME, to list my criteria and hope for the best.

Like somebody else said, there are pros and cons to everything including online dating. But it's another avenue to check out. What have you got to lose?

Oh, and by the way, I vote that you just walk up to Hog Guy with the Harley and just start chatting! ;-)

Gayle
 
>>>I am believer in when you stop looking they will come. When I finally "gave it up" that is when I met my DH. I just stopped caring or looking and BAM! There he was.;.....>>>>>

Did somebody call me? }( :7

I have contemplated using a dating site but haven't done it yet. There's a new site that I'm seeing advertised now that compares themselves to EHarmony but, of course, better. :) It's called chemistry.com. I haven't checked it out but perhaps for those who are interested, it may be another avenue to pursue.
 
>I say give it a shot as well. Like others here, I did the
>match.com thing and this month is one year that we've been
>dating. For me, I found it hard to find 'eligible' men to
>date because I'm a single mom and after a while the first
>thing I looked for on a guy was wedding ring or no wedding
>ring. So it was easier, FOR ME, to list my criteria and hope
>for the best.
>
>Like somebody else said, there are pros and cons to everything
>including online dating. But it's another avenue to check out.
>What have you got to lose?
>
>Oh, and by the way, I vote that you just walk up to Hog Guy
>with the Harley and just start chatting! ;-)
>
>Gayle

Yea, the other problem with The Hot Guy is there is a woman who lived with him when he first moved in, about two years ago. About every six months she makes an appearance. She's clearly a booty call but it looks complicated and I don't share, nor would I ever play tug-of-war with some guy's ex. I do not like drama of any kind. The fact that she still comes around (and he hasn't moved on, evidently) doesn't bode well. Her last appearance was July 4. I just happened to be home as he was letting her in. He looked my way and seemed surprised to see me... Also, I've never been a kid person (I know NOTHING about children) and he has a young son (I'm guessing somewhere around age 7 and cute like his daddy) who's staying with him over the holiday weekend. I'm not sure if the woman is an ex or the boy's mom (now THAT would be complicated) but I don't think she's related to the child because they're never around at the same time. Also, he has a great big dog in his back yard who spends his whole life attached to a pole in the yard, and another large dog who, along with a chihuahua, stay IN his small house. I know the guy works all the time but those dogs need exercise. I kind of wish I knew Hot Guy well enough to press that issue. I'm constantly talking to the big backyard dog (a.k.a. "Poochy Dog") from my upstairs kitchenette window because he's so lonely - and so... ecstatic when Daddy comes home. I really feel he needs to hand those dogs over to someone who'll spend lots of time with them. He's very affectionate with his dogs but they need his time and lots of exercise.

Nothing's going to happen here, I don't think. But, in the meantime, as I sort out my own dilemma, he makes excellent eye candy.
 
I've met and dated both from Eharmony and Match.com.. Alot of matches from Match.com, I already knew. Eharmony set me up with some strange ones so I decided to get off of that site. Yes, I do admit know and then do some window shopping on Yahoo Personals or Match.co for kicks. But, it's been a big relief for me not to be involved in either site.

Hope it all works out for you.
 
I haven't been on eHarmony but I have tried match.com, plentyoffish.com, lavalife.com, and another one whos name escapes me. I would recommend signing up for more than one. I found great guys on all these pages and a few shmucks as well but mostly good. I spent a lot of time chatting with the fellas before meeting them so I didn't have much problem with jerks.

I'm all for online dating. I met my boyfriend on line. Two of my friends also met their men on line and they are both married. It's hard to meet men nowadays and online dating is a great way to go. And if you are smart about it, you should have a very good experience with it. I'm still friends with some of the men I dated previously.

It took me three years to find "the one" but it took my friends less than a year. Go give it a try. I'm certain you will enjoy the experience especially if you have an easy breezy attitude towards it. Have fun!
 
Hi,
I've tried E-Harmony years ago but nothing panned out. I've also dated a few guys on Match.com. I had some great and not-so-great dates..... but when I finally took a break from the internet dating and "quit looking", I met someone! He's great....!! And my teenage son likes him! (That was not always the case!)

Good Luck!

~~Patti~~
 
Warning Will Robinson, negativity ahead! With a possible smidge of bitterness. :p

First off, eHarmony is owned by Match. IMO not much of a difference between the two.

I tried Match, hated it. There was one guy who I did not date but whose username gave me such a laugh: peoplelieonhere. I always LMAO when I saw it b/c it's so true. The few people I did meet in person were nothing at all like their profiles. Honestly, at what point did it become OK to describe the Pillsbury Doughboy as "athletic & fit?" :eek:

I did a profile on eHarmony but was disgusted that you couldn't "sample" the profiles of your matches without paying first. I mean, am I gonna buy a car without test driving it? Nuh uh. So I never actually signed on.

I had my best luck w/JDate. I met some decent guys on there. No one I really clicked with, but some nice, relatively honest fellas.

I'm still convinced the old fashioned way is the only way for me. I know others have had some really great experiences, but I'm not one of them.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Our Newsletter

Get awesome content delivered straight to your inbox.

Top