do all men cheat? warning, kind of explicit
- Thread starter akizora
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alsrnbsn
Cathlete
Amy-
I pulled up this thread while at work the other night, not realizing that the 2 guys I was working with were reading over my shoulder. Anyway, they had no idea who R. Kelly was, so we researched that and both of them commented on your post, and I had to relay it to you. Here goes:
"No, not all men cheat! Only selfish little boys cheat! Two year old babies can't control their impulses. If you put a bowl of cake/cookies in front of a child along with a plate of veggies, telling them NOT to eat the cake/cookies, it's not going to work. They go for the goodies EVERY time!!! This guy is not a man, he's a child!!! She's better off without him!"
I couldn't have said it better myself! Just a reminder, this quote is a compliation of what my 2 married co-workers said!
I pulled up this thread while at work the other night, not realizing that the 2 guys I was working with were reading over my shoulder. Anyway, they had no idea who R. Kelly was, so we researched that and both of them commented on your post, and I had to relay it to you. Here goes:
"No, not all men cheat! Only selfish little boys cheat! Two year old babies can't control their impulses. If you put a bowl of cake/cookies in front of a child along with a plate of veggies, telling them NOT to eat the cake/cookies, it's not going to work. They go for the goodies EVERY time!!! This guy is not a man, he's a child!!! She's better off without him!"
I couldn't have said it better myself! Just a reminder, this quote is a compliation of what my 2 married co-workers said!
Amy,
I don't feel the need to add my "no just no but heck freakin' no, all men don't cheat." But I had to say the saddest part of this for me is that you even have to ask the question, "do all men cheat?" That speaks volumes of the damage your father did to you as a woman.
I'm so sorry you've been made to doubt men because not all men are scum. I work in a very male dominated office (I work for the military) & I see some that do run around constantly but for the most part the men I work with are faithful.
I don't feel the need to add my "no just no but heck freakin' no, all men don't cheat." But I had to say the saddest part of this for me is that you even have to ask the question, "do all men cheat?" That speaks volumes of the damage your father did to you as a woman.
I'm so sorry you've been made to doubt men because not all men are scum. I work in a very male dominated office (I work for the military) & I see some that do run around constantly but for the most part the men I work with are faithful.
darli ann
Cathlete
Amy -
I'm sorry you gave this loser 2 years of your life but I agree it is time for you to replace him with a real man. This guy is a child. In this day and age of AIDs and sexually transmitted diseases who does he think he is thinking it's acceptable jumping from one woman's bed to another? A real man wants an exclusive relationship and does not cheat. He's out there somewhere - probably looking for you!
I'm sorry you gave this loser 2 years of your life but I agree it is time for you to replace him with a real man. This guy is a child. In this day and age of AIDs and sexually transmitted diseases who does he think he is thinking it's acceptable jumping from one woman's bed to another? A real man wants an exclusive relationship and does not cheat. He's out there somewhere - probably looking for you!
Amy, this is a hard question to answer. Because it depends on the situation, one has been through, etc.
Do all men cheat? That is a hard question to answer. I think that men and women, both, cheat. I have seen the other side of the coin, where the woman was all about dating and doing it just for sex. The reality is, it is out there and ppl out there like that.
Now you really are asking can a man and woman stay faithful to one another? That is another hard question. I have been married twice, and I am here to tell you that marriage is a JOB, 24/7, 365 days of the year one at that. Once you start slacking, on either side, it really starts a demise that you both have to overcome. And this is not about sex, but about the "togetherness" of marriage or any long standing committed relationship.
Now, about the sexual part of your relationship. I do not know what it is that you will or will not do, but have you both thought about counseling? Obviously, he needs it and it could be an eye opener for you too. But I do know this, if you are uncomfortable in any aspect of sex, and if you believe/feel it is not giving you any pleasure then do not do it. If your ex, is really perverted, then do not shed anymore tears "boo-hooing" over him because he wants you to perform some crazy antic and takes no consideration of your feelings. Overall, he sounds and reads like a jack, and time for you to move forward.
Finally, if you are really shaken up about you sexual being, there is nothing wrong in counseling. Because, I think this has a lot more to do with you being in a relationship versus the sex. I can be wrong, but that is my gut feeling. Hope this helps.
Do all men cheat? That is a hard question to answer. I think that men and women, both, cheat. I have seen the other side of the coin, where the woman was all about dating and doing it just for sex. The reality is, it is out there and ppl out there like that.
Now you really are asking can a man and woman stay faithful to one another? That is another hard question. I have been married twice, and I am here to tell you that marriage is a JOB, 24/7, 365 days of the year one at that. Once you start slacking, on either side, it really starts a demise that you both have to overcome. And this is not about sex, but about the "togetherness" of marriage or any long standing committed relationship.
Now, about the sexual part of your relationship. I do not know what it is that you will or will not do, but have you both thought about counseling? Obviously, he needs it and it could be an eye opener for you too. But I do know this, if you are uncomfortable in any aspect of sex, and if you believe/feel it is not giving you any pleasure then do not do it. If your ex, is really perverted, then do not shed anymore tears "boo-hooing" over him because he wants you to perform some crazy antic and takes no consideration of your feelings. Overall, he sounds and reads like a jack, and time for you to move forward.
Finally, if you are really shaken up about you sexual being, there is nothing wrong in counseling. Because, I think this has a lot more to do with you being in a relationship versus the sex. I can be wrong, but that is my gut feeling. Hope this helps.
I don't know, I think a lot of people check out other people. To hear my daughter and her friends talk it's their hobby.
The opportunity to cheat has presented itself to me a few times, the feeling that I would feel facing my wife and children knowing I was living a lie, whether they knew or not is what would stop me in my weakest moments
The question is how do they handle the temptation?
Dave
The opportunity to cheat has presented itself to me a few times, the feeling that I would feel facing my wife and children knowing I was living a lie, whether they knew or not is what would stop me in my weakest moments
The question is how do they handle the temptation?
Dave
Imafitnessfreak
Cathlete
I agree with Dave...on a few things. Get rid of this guy before he brings back a disease or infests you with AIDS.
Also, I agree that people do check each other out. I do it! All the time! Never for a split second do I consider doing anything more than a quick scan and a mental assessment (ex/yum, yuck, wow, geez oh Pete). I don't see anything wrong with it. I am sure my DH does the same thing. Just because we are married doesn't mean we cannot notice the beauty in other people. Even as straight, heterosexual women, we check out other women. Oh, and if I see a real gorgeous one with unique characteristics, my DH is the first one I alert! Anyway...I am way off subject.
Amy, If your goal is to fine your companion in life, this guy is a waste of time. You already know he will not be faithful. Unless you are happy with the "open marriage" idea and all that comes with it (diseases, kids with other women, etc.) forget it.
Also, I agree that people do check each other out. I do it! All the time! Never for a split second do I consider doing anything more than a quick scan and a mental assessment (ex/yum, yuck, wow, geez oh Pete). I don't see anything wrong with it. I am sure my DH does the same thing. Just because we are married doesn't mean we cannot notice the beauty in other people. Even as straight, heterosexual women, we check out other women. Oh, and if I see a real gorgeous one with unique characteristics, my DH is the first one I alert! Anyway...I am way off subject.
Amy, If your goal is to fine your companion in life, this guy is a waste of time. You already know he will not be faithful. Unless you are happy with the "open marriage" idea and all that comes with it (diseases, kids with other women, etc.) forget it.
Imafitnessfreak
Cathlete
Also, it does sound like he is trying to manipulate you into doing sexual things you don't want to do. If you cave and do them, there are 2 things that I promise will happen...#1 You will feel horribly cheap and #2 He will still nail other women. PROMISE!!!
kathryn
Cathlete
>I bet alot of men would cheat if they thought their woman
>would not find out. That is just a man, they always are
>checking out women.
According to a survey published in one of the fitness magazines (I forget which one), something like 3/5 married men admitted to cheating on their wives.
>would not find out. That is just a man, they always are
>checking out women.
According to a survey published in one of the fitness magazines (I forget which one), something like 3/5 married men admitted to cheating on their wives.
Bobbi
Cathlete
You deserve so much better ad you can't find it until you plant your foot in his rear. There are many men who value fidelity. Wait for him. You are worth it!
Bobbi http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/spezial/Fool/hb.gif
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/spezial/Fool/bis.gif
Tell me what it is you intend to do with your one wild and precious life? -Mary Oliver
http://www.picturetrail.com/bobbifreedman
Bobbi http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/spezial/Fool/hb.gif
http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/spezial/Fool/bis.gif
Tell me what it is you intend to do with your one wild and precious life? -Mary Oliver
http://www.picturetrail.com/bobbifreedman
deanie
Cathlete
Amy,
Here's what I'm thinking:
1. If you love someone you don't pressure them into doing something they are not comfortable doing (in the bedroom or else where)
2. When you love someone you don't want to be with anyone else. You may think of it,(I think every one looks) but you wouldn't do it- if it meant losing that person.
I think this guy is really immature and needs to grow up. (i.e. trying to manipulate you)
I think you are better off without him and deserve better. Don't settle and you will find someone who is compatable with you.
Take care, because even though he is a jerk, breaking up is hard to do,
Deanie
Here's what I'm thinking:
1. If you love someone you don't pressure them into doing something they are not comfortable doing (in the bedroom or else where)
2. When you love someone you don't want to be with anyone else. You may think of it,(I think every one looks) but you wouldn't do it- if it meant losing that person.
I think this guy is really immature and needs to grow up. (i.e. trying to manipulate you)
I think you are better off without him and deserve better. Don't settle and you will find someone who is compatable with you.
Take care, because even though he is a jerk, breaking up is hard to do,
Deanie
sittinduck
Cathlete
kassia-
love that message...this is a message i think we all as women wonder at least once in their lifetime. Thanks for asking it even tho it is such a difficult time for you...please be strong you are worth sooo much more and definately are supported ....
love that message...this is a message i think we all as women wonder at least once in their lifetime. Thanks for asking it even tho it is such a difficult time for you...please be strong you are worth sooo much more and definately are supported ....