Death threats! Need advice.

[wendybdh]

A friend of mine has now received 3 phone calls over the past 3 weeks from a man threatening to rape her and slit her throat and describes them in a MUCH more profane language than that. Anyway, she filed a police report and they told her they can't do much until he attacks her since they can't trace the "private" number and he hasn't harmed her. Are you kidding me? There has got to be a way to find out who this is coming from. She and her husband live in a home that sits back off the road so noone would know if something happened.

Last week a man came to her house and wanted to mow her lawn but had no mower, no flyers, business cards, etc. Then he just left. Coincidence or was this him?

Sad thing is that about 10 years ago she woke up in the middle of the night to her uncle on top of her trying to rape her. She fought him off and he ended up getting a slap on the wrist. Now, she's wondering if it's him or someone else wanting to hurt her, or just someone playing a sick joke.

She already keeps a gun under her pillow but the thought that she can't even feel safe in her own home is unimaginable.

There has to be something she can do? Any ideas?

 

[Liann]

Wendy - That is awful!!! Does she know the whereabouts of her Uncle now? He would definitely be at the top of my suspect list. It sucks that there is nothing the police can do. I would definitely look into an alarm system for the house if they don't have one already. What an awful situation!!!

 

[carres1973]

I can't believe the police can't do something about threats. I thought threatening someone with bodily harm like that is a crime? YIKES, if it isn't, it should be!!!

Carrie

 

[pink_fortitude]

How about borrowing a friend's dogs? Big dogs, with big barks. Seriously, if the cops aren't going to do anything this guy will hear the dogs and be deterred before he tried anything. We love dogs, will always have some, but we have two big dogs for this reason.

I really hope it is just some perverts idea a nasty joke and he isn't actually serious about it.

Melissa

 

[ldy_solana]

what r they saying they can't do anything?!?!??! we have a man going on trial b/c he threatened ppl and used racial slurs but somebody is threatening a woman to violate and take her life and they wont' do anything. this ticks me off in this country when ppl just can't feel safe anymore and little is done to protect them. put that one on the news and see if they won't find ways to help her.

kassia

 

[Little Lady]

I agree, get some dogs and a tasor. She should keep it with her at all times. She should take it seriously. I had to move from my last house because a pervert down the street wouldn't leave me alone. He waited in his vehicle and followed me. He would watch me at the park. He even came around the corner when I was on a walk and hugged me. He constantly told me I was beautiful and it kept getting creapier. I told the police but they too can't do anything. He didn't do anything wrong they said. She should make reports to the police everytime that a phone call is made or something suspicious happens like the mower guy. They recommended that I leave a paper trail. That's what they called it.

 

[ImFiddY]

Have her buy some of these things and place them in her house. They will 'ding' if it detects movement. Then she will have some time to prepare.

http://www.harborfreight.com/cpi/ctaf/displayitem.taf?Itemnumber=93068

There really is nothing the police can do until something happens. Sad to say but true. I would not answer the phone unless she could identify the caller id. Have her do the anonymous call rejection, *77, on her phone. That way only numbers with caller id's should get thru.

 

[wendygurl]

wow, scary stuff. First of all, hopefully she has caller id. I agree with everything everyone here said, she should get a big dog(or borrow). I also highly recommend self defense classes. i took six of these with my teenage daughter and they focused on fighting off rapists etc...
can't believe the police are saying there is nothing they can do. sure makes us feel safe doesn't it?

 

[Katerchen]

I can't believe the police can't do something about threats. I thought threatening someone with bodily harm like that is a crime? YIKES, if it isn't, it should be!!!

Carrie

It is not a crime if you are threatened over the phone because you are not in immediate danger. If someone is standing in front of you with a pulled gun then the police could arrest the assaillant (although it would be too late then).

Everybody's rights are protected, even the rights of the pervs.

 

[JanetP1507]

I agree with the alarm system and also not answering the phone until she can see who it is. If it's unknown (but legitimate) call, they can leave a message and she can return it a moment later. If it's him and he leaves a threatening message, she return to the police station and play it for them so they can hear for themselves exactly what is being said and then save it in case she needs it in the future. She should also keep her gun on her as much as possible...under the pillow is great but if he should actually try to attack her when she's not in the bedroom it won't do her much good there. She should keep her cell phone on her at all times too and make sure it's always charged. Yes, she should try to verify the uncle's whereabouts and keep EYES OPEN at all times for him and for the man who came to the house lurking around. A big dog and self defense classes too certainly couldn't hurt. If the police won't help then she is going to have to help herself.

 

[JanetP1507]

It is not a crime if you are threatened over the phone because you are not in immediate danger. If someone is standing in front of you with a pulled gun then the police could arrest the assaillant (although it would be too late then).

Everybody's rights are protected, even the rights of the pervs.

Can't that be considered harassment?

 

[morningstar]

It is not a crime if you are threatened over the phone because you are not in immediate danger. If someone is standing in front of you with a pulled gun then the police could arrest the assaillant (although it would be too late then).

Everybody's rights are protected, even the rights of the pervs.

Actually, in Ontario, threatening someone over the phone is a crime, same as in person. The crime is considered to be uttering threats- not harrassment.

 

[horseshowmom]

I agree with all the other advice given.
I would just add that it might be a good idea if she can get a co-worker, neighbor, friend (maybe you if you're in the same city) to meet her and enter the house with her when returning from work, etc. The same goes for parking her car...take extra precautions.
Hopefully it is anonymous and the person has no idea where she lives, but better safe than sorry. The random stop by last week concerns me.
She should brush up on her handgun skills if she hasn't done so recently at a local firing range and as others have said...keep it with her at all times in the house. I think a taser is also a great idea as would be one of those personal alarms which sends out an insanely high shriek when pressed.
Krav Maga is an amazing self defense program and the point is to leave the other person injured or dead so you can walk away. Well worth the time and money!
I am so very sorry that she is going through this and I pray the police are able to get involved in some way soon. I cant imagine the fear she must live in.

 

[Lastchance09]

She should change her phone number, put up video cameras on the property, add very secure locks on the door, let someone know where she is going at all times and record and report any and all suspicious behavior from anyone.

And if she doesn't know who it is, and the number can't be traced, what can the police do? It sounds cold, but they have nothing to go on.

 

[Little Lady]

I don't think they can do anything about harrassement. The police said he was harrassing me and he stepped over the line but then they still couldn't do anything. She should take pictures of anyone suspicious if she can think too.

 

[Govtgirl]

.....And if she doesn't know who it is, and the number can't be traced, what can the police do? It sounds cold, but they have nothing to go on.

Absolutely true.

I'd get an unlisted number, and an alarm system pronto.. So sorry this is happening to your friend.

 

[kathryn]

Can't that be considered harassment?

That's what I was thinking.

 

[booboo39]

Surveillance system with the alarm system. Also numerous signs at windows and all entrances informing anyone that there 24 hour surveillance. Along with all the other suggestions mentioned!
I have two indoor small yapping dogs that bark at everything. Two outdoor dogs, one a 130 lb german shepherd that was not socialized enough. Needless to say I sleep really well at night! Prayers will be said for your safety.
Booboo

 

[Aquajock]

Whether or not this conduct would be considered a crime probably depends on the state in which the offense occurred; sounds like it rises to the level of terroristic threat to me.

I do think that most major telephone service providers have annoyance call centers which can ferret out the originating telephone numbers of calls coming into a customer's line. I know Qwest has such a service. That might be a good means by which the caller / harasser can be identified. This sounds very disturbing to me, and it's dismaying that your friend's local police department is so blase'. Maybe she should speak with someone else, say in her city or district attorney's office.

A-Jock

 

[Stephanie0523]

I am so sorry that this is happening to your friend! How horrible!! I have a phone that announces who is calling and I can see who is calling on the ID. It says "Private Caller" or "Number Unavailable" sometimes, but sometimes if it's "Private Caller" it still lists a number, just not a name. You may want to tell her to get one of those phones. At least she'll know who is calling and will know if she can answer it. Other ideas, have her husband leave the message on the voicemail. Definitely get a big dog and a security system. How sad that the police won't even try to do anything!