An explanation

D

dlavie

Cathlete
Hi all.

I received some emails from people most good a couple well... Thank you for your comments good and bad. I have a wealth of friends on line and off line, most of them say my sensitivity is a strong point. My "sensitivity" extends outwards to lots of people, some people refer to it as compassion.


I was offended by the SNMVideos post on the "ghost" thread. The post for the most part was ok, asking people to be polite. Then the post became an attempt at a extremely polished politically correct mission statement that didn't extend it's diversity to any members with a Y chromosone. Is that statement on posters at SNM Video? It was almost too polished.

In the past we've enjoyed a lot of kidding about the gender differences between user and user. I was taken completely by suprise by the almost official tone from the host of this board.

The followup apology made it worse. If SNM wants to empower guys "as many as we'd like to" then they need to not be indifferent about it. The "Oh yeah, you too approach."

Maybe I'll take a "chill pill" and bite my tongue but this would be an excellent time to see the real mission statement for SNMVideos

Once again, if I've offended anyone I apologize it was certainly not my intention to hurt any fellow members.

Dave
 
Dave,

I have to say you took the statement far too personally and blew things out of all proportion. The fact is, around 95-97% of users of home fitness videos are women and, in my opinion, the videos themselves are gender biased i.e. they are instructed by women, they tend to be dancy/aerobic type exercise, there is an emphasis on fashion, make-up and softer lighting. It has been like this since the days of Jane Fonda.

The fact that men tend not to use fitness videos is because they see it as sissy, feminine or even gay. This has nothing to do with Cathe's marketing or the company's mission statement, but the attitude of the male population. Cathe has some male users but they are still a very small minority compare to the number of female users. And since it's the women who are generating the profits for the company, she wants to keep them happy.

The men who use Cathe's workouts should not expect preferential treatment because of their gender. It's like when women start to play football (soccer) or any other male dominated sport we don't ask to you to bend the rules for us. I don't go to football matches and demand there be cushioned seat for my soft bottom, I don't expect better language or manners from the men - I expect swearing, shouting, drinking and bad language. I am encroaching on what is predominantly a male territory and I think I would booed by these men if I behave like a prima-donna.

Yen
 
Dave,

I totally understand what you are saying but...please don't let what was precipitated by one mean-spirited or troublemaking person make you leave the forums. As you can see, we all value your input and would be sad to see you go. If you do leave, it seems B&G gets what she wanted which was to disrupt and divide our little "family." Had that thread never been started, SNM would not have had to reply. Maybe their reply left a little to be desired on the testosterone front, but I am sure it wasn't intentional.

Besides, you can't leave Jerry alone in all this!!! ;)
 
Dave, We met several folks from SNM on the Road Trip and they were all smiling, gracious, and a bit overwhelmed, I thought, at the high emotions being shown by 105 trippers. And most of all, they were all people. Some of them were even man-people! In an attempt to stop the craziness that has been going on in the forum recently, someone from SNM posted, maybe a little too quickly, maybe not quickly enough, what I thought was a professional and even handed reply. I'm sure the writer is sorry the post took on a gender bias. While I appreciate your sensitivity, I hope you can take a deep breath, get past this slight, and return to the forum.
 
dave,
i am certainly not offended. and i won't say you were overly sensitive. i can understand with all that has gone on here, there is always that last comment or post that will break the camel's back and say "i have had it with this". i think in the heat of moment SNM just didn't think exactly how they worded things, i have never heard them single anybody out before, so IMO i think it was a slip of the tounge. but i am glad to see you back. we need more Y chromsones here!!!!

kassia

http://www.picturetrail.com/ldy_solana

"And do what thee wilt as long as ye harm none"

http://images.meez.com/user03/06/01/04/060104_10010099873.gif
 
Hey Dave, nice to see you here, what you say makes sense and you have a point. However, don't lose sight of the fact that the post was probably written by a male (Chris) to a female poster with a veiled slag to another female. SNM have proven themselves adept at diplomacy and sensitivity to members over the years, I hope you can give them the benefit of the doubt that it was a 'whoops' made while the author was very much in the heat of the moment. So nice to see you here...oh... I already said that :D

Take Care
Laurie
 
Dave,

I just wanted to say, I hope you stick around. I always love reading your posts and would miss them if you decide to leave.

Jean
 
Hello Dave.
Glad you're back. I read your posts and also from the other men to get the male perspective on working out, etc.. You and the guys add balance here.
Hope you have a Great Day!!
 
Besides, you can't leave Jerry alone in all this!!!



I agree 100%

Although it sure would be fun trying to see if I could handle it!!

Jerry
 
Just wanted to say I agree with what everyone says. If I were to write how I see this whole thing, I would absolutely ditto Robin's post. Hope you stick around.
 
Hi Dave....thank you for the explanation. I think sensitivity is a very strong quality to have for a guy. I sometimes wish my DH had more...:)

I myself get so frustrated with some of the posters that just seem to want to cause trouble and create drama. I feel that is when someone eventually gets offended and goes due to the increased drama that can occur.

No apology necessary for me as you did nothing to offend me....:)..I do understand why this bothered you the way it did. Over the years I have posted I have been offended a few times which is why I normally stay away from particular posts as it is just not worth it to me.

I think you are a good guy and I hope taking the "chill pill" works as I would enjoy still seeing you post...:)
 
Glad to see you back and sorry that you were offended by SNM's response. Honestly thought you were joking for a while there. I thought you knew that the person who wrote from SNM was a male. Pretty sure it was Chris and from meeting him at the roadtrip - no doubt he's a guy. I'm sure he didn't mean to offend his own and if you ever got a chance to meet him, you'd probably have a good laugh over it. Again sorry you had hurt feelings though and glad to see you come back.
 
Ah,

A challenge awaits me.

Good to see you back Dave.

Janie

The idea is to die young as late as possible

www.picturetrail.com/janiejoey

0607_10008295321.gif
 
Glad to hear from you, Dave!! I am sorry you were offended by the SNM statement. I am not saying you shouldn't be, if you are offended, you are and I am not the one in your shoes.

I just would like to say, that with expecting all that political correctness, we sometimes forget that everyone is human. Meaning, that I am sure all of us here have made statements that are not exactly politically correct and that we would like to take back or say differently, if given the chance.

No one is perfect, no me, not you, not SNM (although we like to think they are) and that's what makes us human.

Anyway, I hope you will be back, I would miss your posts on the forum!!
 
Well, Dave, I'm not going to be nice like everyone else. I'm going to tell you like my mother used to tell me when I was just a little girl...

GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!!!!!:) :)
 
I am just wondering why some people assume that if you post on a thread (an open thread, this IS open discussion right?) that people automatically assume that one has an agenda or some hidden purpose. And why do some feel the need to go and "tell" the powers that be. I mean come on.

I guess people are right about this forum, if you don't agree with the status quo, you are immediately ostracized.
 
>I am just wondering why some people assume that if you post
>on a thread (an open thread, this IS open discussion right?)
>that people automatically assume that one has an agenda or
>some hidden purpose. And why do some feel the need to go and
>"tell" the powers that be. I mean come on.
>
>I guess people are right about this forum, if you don't agree
>with the status quo, you are immediately ostracized.


What does this have to do with this particular thread? This is Dave's thread explaining how his feelings were hurt the other day and is no place for this kind of a comment.
 
>I am just wondering why some people assume that if you post
>on a thread (an open thread, this IS open discussion right?)
>that people automatically assume that one has an agenda or
>some hidden purpose. And why do some feel the need to go and
>"tell" the powers that be. I mean come on.
>
>I guess people are right about this forum, if you don't agree
>with the status quo, you are immediately ostracized.

For someone with only 5 posts and a join date of 4 days ago, you sure seem to think you know an awful lot about these forums....

Do I know you from somewhere??? }(
 
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