Who is the breadwinner in your house?

The first 12 years DH was the breadwinner and now for the last six, I am. During the exact same time period (6 years ago), DH's industry had a slump so his salary went down and my career took off and my salary shot up. So we were making the same money, just switched who was bringing the most in. So because of this slump he also decided to make a career change. He will be making close to what I'm making by next year and may eventually surpass me.

But for us this makes no difference. We have very clearly defined financial goals we work towards and we live and work as a team. He is hugely supportive of my career. He is my partner in all things. We have a mutually equal relationship and share everything right down to the housework and cooking. (He does take care of the cars and I do the laundry, but other than that we both do everything.) :)

So in answer to your question...no issues here! :)
Jo
 
We work in the same place, same positions, different departments, but have to interact often. I have worked there 22 years, him 6. I make more and he has no issues with that at all.
 
Gee, Bobbi, I think I'm a bit like Rich. I was rather sheltered and a bit spoiled growing up, but never had any real emotional support or acceptance. I too am very responsible in my career, but can be a bit of a baby at home. I think I'm getting better with each passing year, but I have a lot to overcome. If you ever want to understand Rich's attitude a bit better, I'd be happy to have you bounce some stuff off of me. For better or worse, sounds like your DH and I have a lot in common.

-Nancy
 
It's been very interesting reading this thread. It seems like it's not a problem either way with most of you and that is truly encouraging news to me.

For us, both DH and I are the breadwinners in our house. DH and I were making roughly the same amount of money until I cut back to working part time. It does make me feel good to know though that with my job (personal training) I can go back to making full time money in no time in case I ever need to in the future.
 
I make more, but DH is self employed and has more flexibility to deal with picking up DD when she was sick at school or needs a ride to practice, etc. Our finances have always been joint, but I handle all the day to day bill paying and decisions. We decide jointly about big things. Generally, we don't argue about money. Although he sometimes wonders where it all goes. He makes the deposits for his business, I pay the bills. He forgets how expensive things are - like payroll, property taxes, heating bills. If I say money is tight, he'll say "But I just deposited $4000! What did you spend it on?" Then I sit him down and we go through the bills and he understands.

Whe DH first went into business and I suddenly became the primary breadwinner, it was scary for me. I felt like I was responsible for everything. He didn't take his business very seriously for the first twelve months and we lost a lost of ground that year. But I finally got through to him that he needed to focus on the business or get a job. That was 12 years ago and it's been fine since.

We combined our money when we were engaged and it works well for us. But I know some people who've been together for 20+ years and still keep everything totally separate. It's interesting to note how different couples do their finances - jointly vs. separately.
 
This thread has been every enlightening! It's interesting to read how everyone has dealt with this issue.

I'm an RN and DH is an electrical engineer. We used to make almost the same salary, but believe it or not, the need for engineers in this country has surpassed even that of nurses now, and he is clearly the breadwinner in our family. I'm basically a SAHM now, I work per diem, but even if I went back to working full time, he'd still make a lot more than me.

Despite that, he's wonderful around the house and thinks nothing of taking over child care duty once he comes home from work. He also spends his spare time fixing everything around the house. We both pull our loads, but I have to admit he does a lot more than me. I get exhausted just watching him!
 
DH and I make the exact same salary. We are both attorneys at the same level of experience. The only thing that could be weird is if we get different bonuses at the end of the year, which hasn't happened yet, but could. That would be hard to deal with for either of us, since we are being compared by the exact same people under the exact same standards (we work at the same law firm). Well will see how it turns out when that happens.
 
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