What motivates you?

[goldenrun358]

I just need to vent a little here because I am lacking motivation toward self discipline and I am hoping you will share some tips on how you stay motivated to say no when you really want a cookie, chip, etc.

First of all, I lurk here often, but don't post much because I never have time to follow up with my posts! I have been working out with Cathe for 5 or 6 years now and have learned sooo much and gotten in better overall shape than I ever thought possible!

That being said, I also weigh more now than ever before and I am TIRED of the mental struggle and self-berating! I really only want to lose 10lbs. I want it really bad. But for whatever reason, I don't want it bad enough to consistently keep my calories where they need to be to lose the last 10lbs. For example, I ate really great today. I didn't eat ANY processed foods today...until after dinner. I was feeling stressed, tired, and wanting some quiet me time and so I ate three, yes three, large bowls of Cheerios/Kix. Now I am so bloated and frustrated with myself!

Why do I self-destruct?

On top of this I have more barriers now to consistent exercise than ever before and it is very annoying. The biggest barrier at this time is my healing broken foot. I fell down the stairs at the end of January and had surgery three weeks ago. I finally got off crutches and got the go-ahead to lift as long as I am sitting or lying down. You can actually do a lot with these restrictions and I have been having fun being creative...but, I really would love a long run.

Cabin fever isn't helping either!

Well, for those of you who stuck it out through this long bit of complaining, I apologize for being so negative! Does any one have any suggestions for making losing the last 10lbs a little easier? I signed up for Cathe's nutrition manager and have been using it for three days hoping that will help.

Thanks for listening...now what motivates you?

 

[112toGuru]

Stop bargaining for tomorrow, do what you need to do today.

Eat the right food.

 

[kathryn]

What I've read about motivating students might help you find your own motivation.

There are two types of motivation, and for some people, one works better than the other.

Positive motivation (which is what most people usually talk about) if when you're motivated to do something in order to have a positive outcome (for eating well and exercising, it could be to fit back in the clothes you wore 5 years ago, to have a certain look, to stay healthy, to have the strength to make everyday activties easier).

Negative motivation is when you're motivated to act to avoid negative outcomes : exercising and eating right to avoid the diabetes that runs in your family, seeing someone overweight and not wanting to ever look like that, etc.)..


Sounds like you need some ways of coping with stress and fatigue that don't include self-medicating yourself with food (that seems to be what it is, as consumption of carbohydrates--Cheerios/Kix---increases the production of some chemical in our brains--starts with an 's' but I forget at the moment--which makes us feel calm and good). Exercise could be one, meditation or some other form of relaxation could be another, a hobby that calms you could be another.

One thingyou might consider is to purge your cupboards of anything that you might be tempted to overdo on in the future. Replace Cheerios/Kix (processed carbs) with oatmeal that you'd have to cook to make it edible, for example. Toss the remaining Cheerios/Kix out on the bird feeder, take unopened boxes of stuff like that to a food bank, and make sure you keep only small, portioned amounts of any trigger foods (foods that you tend to be unable to stop eating once you start) around.

HTH

 

[lioness]

What motivates me is to be healthy and strong. The surface stuff ~ looking good, etc is just gravy for me.

It seems like you are focusing on the scale too much. What happens when you knock off the 10 pounds? Where does your focus go then? I hear so many people talk about losing the last 5 or 10 pounds. Then what? You go back to eating junk??

What has helped me be consistent in my workouts and eating has been a support system. My sister and I workout together and I have a challenge with a bunch of forum buddies that helps me stay consistent with my eating and workout schedule. My goal is for 5-6 days of workouts and to eat 5-6 healthy meals a day. I allow myself 1 cheat meal a week. For holidays I allow myself cheat days but I always get my workouts in. This has really worked for me and holds me accountable.

Look for a support group or check-in that can help you stay accountable. You need to find a balance between living a healthy lifestyle and enjoying life.

Wishing you a speedy recovery!

 

[DebbieH]

Great advice here! I hear you on the cabin fever too! I think that plays a big part! Wishing you a full recovery very soon so you can REALLY go at it! Thinking of you and stay positive! It WILL turn around!

 

[RapidBreath]

self discipline

Saying "no"
Does any one have any suggestions for making losing the last 10lbs a little easier?

now what motivates you?

I use a podcast called Inside Out Weight Loss which has helped me with my emotional eating. It has given me tools to deal with the occasional binge without the need for berating myself. The cool thing is that the podcast is free and I'm going to tell you how to do it for yourself without making you go listen to it, even though I recommend that you listen to the first 18 episodes (you can download them from Renee Stephen's website over at Personal Media dot com.)

The reason you self destruct is that in that moment the food is serving you in some way. What you need is an alternative to food to serve that part of you that wants either some comfort, some relief from stress. The carbohydrate in your cereal did its job, it released some chemicals in your body which helped you relax. Unfortunately, you also now feel bloated and have a terrible tummy ache. OUch!!! The trick is to shift your focus from feeling good in the short minutes you were eating (average for most people is actually 7 minutes in your mouth.) to recognizing just how long that horrible tummy ache lasted (couple hours, overnight or days????) Now, I don't want you to beat yourself up, what I want is for you to think about what it would actually take to feel more good over time.

You are healing from a break. You will be unlikely to be losing any weight during this time. Instead of focusing on weight loss, it makes sense to focus on your healing. Unfortunately, you can't do the cardio which helps with the stress and anxiety you are feeling. Ask yourself, is there any other technique that you can use to address those needs without applying our friend, food? The problem with using food is that if it actually were your friend, it wouldn't treat you so darn bad. It can only help nourish you to a point, beyond that it starts causing harm.

The negativity is a combination of things conspiring against you. The chemistry your body makes while you are healing (I speak from experience, I have had terrible breaks.) makes you actively feel terrible, anxious and creates the chemistry of negativity. This tends to color our experiences. It makes everything seem terrible, even if it isn't really that bad.

Lets talk about something called the Re Do. Its a mental exercise that anybody can do. You see the action, experience, situation and behavior that you want to change. Then, you replace it in your mind with the behavior that you do want. This is a pro-active approach to behavior modification with out the need for self recrimination. You don't have to behave perfectly. It takes a couple of times for this therapy to work.

I just recently switched back to AM workouts and I just did not want to get up in the morning, well just two times of 'Re-Do' and voila I just get up in the AM now. Without forcing myself!! Thats the key. This isn't a test of my will, its because I want to feel better, I want to feel more good over time than feeling bad.

I do second Jane's (Lioness) idea to join a check-in.

 

[lrusso]

What motivates me is seeing results. Weight isn't my issue but toning up was. The more results and definition I see the more motivated I get. The more motivated I am the more I want to work out. Now I look better,feel better, eat healthier, and stay motivated. It's all good!

 

[goldenrun358]

What motivates me is to be healthy and strong. The surface stuff ~ looking good, etc is just gravy for me.

It seems like you are focusing on the scale too much. What happens when you knock off the 10 pounds? Where does your focus go then? I hear so many people talk about losing the last 5 or 10 pounds. Then what? You go back to eating junk??

What has helped me be consistent in my workouts and eating has been a support system. My sister and I workout together and I have a challenge with a bunch of forum buddies that helps me stay consistent with my eating and workout schedule. My goal is for 5-6 days of workouts and to eat 5-6 healthy meals a day. I allow myself 1 cheat meal a week. For holidays I allow myself cheat days but I always get my workouts in. This has really worked for me and holds me accountable.

Look for a support group or check-in that can help you stay accountable. You need to find a balance between living a healthy lifestyle and enjoying life.

Wishing you a speedy recovery!

Amen to finding a balance between a living a healthy life and enjoying life. This is what I am striving for and overall doing very well with.

And the goal is not to lose 5-10lbs and then go back to eating junk. I totally agree with you and get very annoyed with people when they talk about dieting and losing weight, but don't actually mention wanting to change their life style. I truly don't believe in diets. My goal is to continue to cultivate a healthier lifestyle as my main focus with losing that last 5-10lbs as the by-product of a healthier lifestyle. At this time I am focusing on eating 5 servings of fruits/veggies per day and mostly eliminating processed foods. My frustration comes in eating pretty healthy the majority of the time and STILL having to struggle to be the weight I want to be. Why does it have to be so hard when I already do so many things right? And, I know that with a BMI of 23.5 I can safely lose 10lbs and still be healthy. Plus, my clothes with fit better, I will be able to run faster, and I won't have so much jiggle. These are all good things in my book.

I wish that I had someone in my life that was a workout buddy and would share the journey of a healthy lifestyle with me. It is sooo important to me. And despite my attempts to get my mother/brothers/husband/sister-in-laws interested, no one has the passion or interest in it that I do. A check in has never seemed to work for me because between working full time and taking care of a family, I just don't seem to be able to check in regularly.

I also want to add that my main motivation for wanting to be in tip-top shape nutritionally is because my husband and are trying for our second child and I don't want any more artificial ingredients/preservatives/pesticides in my body than necessary. I have switched to organic milk, organic apples/berries/celery/lettuce/salads. I eat only Fage yogurt (vs artificially flavored and sweetened types), I have stopped eating artificial sweeteners and am instead using Agave nectar. I am eating more walnuts and omega 3's than ever before. I am now eating meats almost exclusively from local farmers. The beef and pork are very lean and the cattle were grass fed and neither were given growth hormones. And I can hardly eat commercial poultry due to increased awareness about the conditions under which the poultry are raised. On top of these changes, I hardly ever eat out. I DO NOT eat fast food. EVER. I do not drink soda, sports drinks, alcohol, or even coffee. I haven't had a real french fry in about over 10 years. Seriously.

All these changes and I still can't lose ten pounds. I get so frustrated!! The bottom line is calories in vs calories out. Doesn't matter if it's organic or not because too much is too much. And I do have a sweet tooth!

That being said, I have totally gotten off on a tangent! But, it has kind of brought into focus for me that fact that it sometimes feels like no matter what I do, it isn't enough. I have to make more changes, sacrifice more, eat less, workout more, workout harder, lift heavier, etc. Why, after all that I do, can't it just be easier to maintain a weight at which I feel most comfortable???

 

[lioness]

All these changes and I still can't lose ten pounds. I get so frustrated!! The bottom line is calories in vs calories out. Doesn't matter if it's organic or not because too much is too much. And I do have a sweet tooth!

That being said, I have totally gotten off on a tangent! But, it has kind of brought into focus for me that fact that it sometimes feels like no matter what I do, it isn't enough. I have to make more changes, sacrifice more, eat less, workout more, workout harder, lift heavier, etc. Why, after all that I do, can't it just be easier to maintain a weight at which I feel most comfortable???

I agree with your statement here. Maintenance is hard work. I will be 50 this year and I have come to a place where I accept that I am doing the best I can do with my eating and working out. I don't own a scale anymore and just go by how I feel and how my clothes fit. My focus now is being fit and healthy.

It seems like you headed in the right direction. I hope it all works out for you. Sometimes we will feel lost and can't fine the perfect answer but usually it will come when the time is right. Keep heading down the path and you will surely find the way that works best for you.