kathryn
Cathlete
Especially since the 'nasty' meaning seems to be Canadian (just make sure she doesn't hang out with Canadian guys, and there should be no problem).
TATOO AT 15!!!!!!!
- Thread starter messyjess
- Start date
kathryn
Cathlete
Another thought: kids are often 'grounded' when they misbehave.
I think mom needs to be 'grounded' as well: no unsupervised alone time with any of your kids (if there are others as well) for a certain amount of time, until she earns back your trust (which means an effort on her part, starting with a sincere apology).
I think mom needs to be 'grounded' as well: no unsupervised alone time with any of your kids (if there are others as well) for a certain amount of time, until she earns back your trust (which means an effort on her part, starting with a sincere apology).
I dont know why my daughter chose that particular area. I had so many questions going through my mind when she first told me tuesday evening. I'll have to ask her that. But I did confront my mom on the telephone. The first thing that came flying out of my mouth was WHAT THE F@#$% WHERE YOU THINKING????? ARE YOU SOME SORT OF A$$@#$%???? She was like I'm so sorry but she was begging me to take her and I said ARE YOU 15 OR 50??? WHOSE THE ADULT HERE??? HOW DARE YOU GO BEHIND MY BACK AND DO THIS?? Anyway I could go on and on about what I said but now I was becoming more angry with my daughter because when I asked her if she did beg she did not deny it. So now I could see how it all went down.
My daughter and I have a great relationship and she comes to me for my advice and opinions on many things but she also knows that I do draw the line so what I learned from this is that maybe she isnt as innocent as I think she is. I mean I know she's no angel she is 15 going on 16 god only knows the things I did at that age which of course I will NEVER tell her and she does ask me all the time.
My daughter and I have a great relationship and she comes to me for my advice and opinions on many things but she also knows that I do draw the line so what I learned from this is that maybe she isnt as innocent as I think she is. I mean I know she's no angel she is 15 going on 16 god only knows the things I did at that age which of course I will NEVER tell her and she does ask me all the time.
Liann
Cathlete
messyjess - As a former teenager who was REALLY good at making up stories on the fly to smooth things over with her mom, I think you are probably right on the daughter "not being so innocent" train of thought. I might even question the validity of the "36 explanation" you were given. The first thing I would have done was try to think of a story that would play to my mom's heart strings and try to garner sympathy. I'm not saying she is lying about it, but it does smell fishy to this former teenage manipulator. 
And the location of it is also a little strange. Why would she want to remember her dearly departed friend every time she looks at her "bikini" line? Hopefully, you guys will be able to laugh about all of this in 20 years. Thank goodness it was something tiny!
And the location of it is also a little strange. Why would she want to remember her dearly departed friend every time she looks at her "bikini" line? Hopefully, you guys will be able to laugh about all of this in 20 years. Thank goodness it was something tiny!
Worknprogress
Cathlete
I am angry for you!!
My oldest son, who is now 20 always wanted a tattoo when he was your daughter's age. I always told him that when he was 18 he could do whatever he wanted to his body but until then - it was my decision and the answer was a solid no which I never wavered on.
Interestingly enough, once he turned 18 he was no longer interested in getting one and was glad he never did. There is a chance that your daughter could have lost interest in getting one as well once she got a little older. That's why we are supposed to make these decisions for them when they are underage. But it was YOUR decision to make - not your Mom's. For your Mom to do this behind your back is a huge betrayal to you and I can't imagine how you must be feeling.
It sounds like you have a good relationship with your daughter though, and it is a good thing that she came and told you rather than hide it like Grandma said.
P.S. I am clueless as to what the number 36 is supposed to symbolize - would someone please PM me - I can't find it on the web.
My oldest son, who is now 20 always wanted a tattoo when he was your daughter's age. I always told him that when he was 18 he could do whatever he wanted to his body but until then - it was my decision and the answer was a solid no which I never wavered on.
Interestingly enough, once he turned 18 he was no longer interested in getting one and was glad he never did. There is a chance that your daughter could have lost interest in getting one as well once she got a little older. That's why we are supposed to make these decisions for them when they are underage. But it was YOUR decision to make - not your Mom's. For your Mom to do this behind your back is a huge betrayal to you and I can't imagine how you must be feeling.
It sounds like you have a good relationship with your daughter though, and it is a good thing that she came and told you rather than hide it like Grandma said.
P.S. I am clueless as to what the number 36 is supposed to symbolize - would someone please PM me - I can't find it on the web.
crazystepr
Cathlete
celestialtimes
Cathlete
messyjess - As a former teenager who was REALLY good at making up stories on the fly to smooth things over with her mom, I think you are probably right on the daughter "not being so innocent" train of thought. I might even question the validity of the "36 explanation" you were given. The first thing I would have done was try to think of a story that would play to my mom's heart strings and try to garner sympathy. I'm not saying she is lying about it, but it does smell fishy to this former teenage manipulator.
Exactly my thought.
crazystepr
Cathlete
Mine as well. I was the most deceitful teenager and was always making up lies that would pull at my mother's heartstrings--that way she wouldn't question me further.
I don't know. I can't read your daughters mind but I just feel like there's a whole circle of lies and deceit going on that needs to stop asap.
cindi1
Cathlete
I would be absolutely furious at the both of them. Who knows the real story of what happened, who begged, who allowed, etc. But definitely an opportunity to talk to your daughter more about making decisions.
Both have a lot to do to restore any trust you have in them.
I'm really sorry.
Both have a lot to do to restore any trust you have in them.
I'm really sorry.
SirenSongWoman
Cathlete
Your mother needs psychological help. No right-thinking person would ever pull a stunt like this with their granddaughter, overstepping the rights of her mother in such an egregious fashion.