Stay-At-Home Moms..(Long)

Thank you all So Much!!

Thank you all for being so supportive and open about your own experiences. I haven't been able to really get online until this morning and I feel so great after reading this!! I know I've made the best decision for me and my family, and I have been doing well this week to make my exercising a priority. It's not easy when we also run a business (my husband owns a construction company, so alot of you know how demanding that can be!)

I truly appreciate all of your kind words, ideas and suggestions. It means alot to know I can come here for some support, motivation and understanding - even if I can't get out of the house that day!

Thanks again,
Tricia
 
Hang in there Tricia. You are on your way. I think the key is flexibility. Funny, I"m still struggling with that myself.

I've been exercising, or thinking about starting again for about five-six years now. It has been quite the journey.

Young kids are a huge challenge.

My best success came from enrolling my husband in my fitness journey. He became my partner and problem solver as I would come to him and discuss my goals and how we could coordinate our schedules.

We work it out together. My husband appreciates it so much when I don't come to him complaining or whining about how it isn't working out. I treat him like an adult and he knows I'm genuinely interested in his input.

I know this because of how i started out . I did a lot of whining!!! it took me a while to teach myself and him what would be a supportive shcedule.

Keep up the good work and best of success for your progress!!

Danna
 
Hi, Tricia! My recommendation is to be sure that you also prioritize your workouts and "me time"! When my kids were young that meant working out at night, running in the dark and finding time where ever it could be found. Now I have two teen daughters who can help and my youngest is in kindergarten and when he's at school for two and half hours, that's workout time! So hang in there. It gets easier as they get older and you have the added benefit of modelling good habits to them. You might also hook up with a group to give you support. Whn my girls were toddlers, I joined a MOP (Mother of Preschoolers) http://www.gospelcom.net/mops/ group which I attended every other Tuesday. We brought food and had speakers on various mom-related topics and broke into discussion groups while wonderful caregivers took care of our young ones and tried to give us a break. If you have friends who are at the same place as you are in life, they too can be a great resource. Trading babysitting time a few times a week is terrific. And never forget how important your job is. The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world!
Bobbi http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif "Chick's rule!"
 
Hi,

I am not married and I don't have kids (although I do have 3 cats and a mortgage ;) ) but I really feel for all of you ladies as I read this. Why is it that your husbands' work is done as soon as they get home but you are supposed to be on call 24/7? And how messed up is it that you are made to feel GUILTY for taking an hour to work out - which will in turn make you better moms because you'll be more healthy and active and will live longer as well as being positive role models for your kids? I know this isn't possible but I wish you could take a week and go to Hawaii or something, and leave your 'DH'es home with the kids and the laundry and the groceries and the cleaning etc. and they could see how never ending it is and that it isn't magic fairies who keep the place running, its YOU!

I don't mean this as a blanket statement by any means but a lot of men out there are really clueless about what it takes to keep a family/household going. And eating out and hiring a cleaning lady doesn't count. Points for all the men out there who aren't clueless and do more than their share, but still.

Anyway take that hour and be good to yourself, you are helping your family in the long run.

Jill
 
Tricia,

It has taken me about half an hour to just glance through the replies to this post. My son (16 months) has brought me an assortment of books to "wee, wee, wee" while I was trying to have some time to re-motivate myself to work out today. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. I find myself pausing my tapes, and redirecting my son’s attention to not climb on the step while I try to work out. I have thought I also will need to get up early in the morning to work out, but it's just getting the motivation to get out of bed that is sabotaging my efforts. One suggestion...if you have a small fan you can turn it on in your daughter's room at bed or nap time while you work out, the white noise will block out any noises. I put my son to bed between 7 and 8 every night with the fan on so my DH and I can spend some time together (or at least in the same room). He is in Medical school and I am still taking distance classes to finish up my degree so we both have a lot of studying to do. Speaking of the respect issue, that's a tough one for me..., I often feel intimidated by the women that are going to school with my husband. Very few of them are married and we are the only ones with a child (we do plan on having another one soon too). I know some have asked my DH what I do all day since I am a SAHM. I would love to have them slip on my skin for a day to experience, but since I can't do that I'll just smile and hope they too will experience the joy/hardship/total selflessness that it takes to be a Mom. Just wondering...Have you done the BFL before? Just wondering how you incorporate the work outs? Do you do Cathe tapes or just make up your own routine? I have been thinking about doing it as well and would like to know what other's experiences have been.

Thanks,
Lindsay
 
there's been a ton of great stuff said here. i've been home for four years. my six month old is chewing on the treadmill so i'll be brief!

SAHMs - NEVER feel guilty. we save a lot by having me home (clothes, gas, food, daycare)and i figure me being home saves us some family time evenings/weekends. otherwise we'd be spending that time doing what i do all day - laundry, errands, etc.

as far as working out, i do mine in the morning before kids are up. no matter what i'm always too tired, physically and mentally, by the end of the day. my house never really gets "cleaned" because i never get past the picking up stage of things. i spot clean where i can. if you don't take care of yourself no one will.

yard, house, all of that - there's plenty of time for that later. you'll look back at pictures of these years down the road and be sad because you won't be able to remember.

food - carry the kids dishes right to the sink and dump it before temptation wins. i make double batches of fish (salmon especially) and the leftover makes great lunch the next day that just needs to be heated up. or eaten right out the tinfoil as you're running a kid to the doctor!
 
Hi Tricia,

You are doing the most important thing you could be doing at this time in your life. I was never able to stay home with any of my 3 sons but would've loved to-it just wasn't possible at the time. My younger sister has never worked outside the home, but she is busy all day. I don't know where the term stay at home mom came from, makes it sound like you don't do anything. I personally don't think men know what really goes on during the day. Feeding, bathing and playing with the kids, laundry, housework etc. I have a lot of respect for SAHM's. As for my sister-she is never home, she volunteers at 2 schools as well manage all their activities. You should not underestimate yourself, and it is okay to take time for yourself. It will get better as your daughter gets older. For me, I have always exercised in early morning before my kids got up. That's not always an option with a toddler though.

Diana
 
Hi Lindsay,

Thanks so much for your post - I get alot of support from these wonderful women and men (Trevor)! I have been doing my workouts mostly at night after Isabella goes to bed recently. I do get to work out during her nap maybe 2 days a week, which is really nice. I try to do my strength workouts at those times since there isn't as much noise - just me groaning to "Get that weight up there" as Cathe says!

About your question, I did start the BFL one other time and had lost about 10 pounds. Then I found out I was pregnant and had to stop. I've since wondered how much of the weight loss was due to the nausea!
This go round, I've decided I'm going to "officially enter" - meaning taking the before pics and journaling, etc. I called EAS for the package to compete, and it arrived just the other day. So I've decided my official "start day" will be on Monday, the 26th. I'm doing that because we are flying home over the weekend and I don't want to worry about it - although I plan to eat sensibly as much as possible.

Regarding workouts, I've been doing prep for my BFL for about a month. During that time I've been doing the Pyramids for strength (up only) and 5 intervals of IMAX and IMAX2 for cardio. YES - I ONLY USE CATHE. I couldn't/can't make myself do it without motivation and guidance. You may have seen the BFL check-ins, please feel free to join us!

Oh, and don't worry about those women in hubby's classes. I have found most times in life, there is a definite boomerang affect. Just think how nice it will be to know they had you to look at once they do have a child and they'll say "Wow, I never knew how much Lindsay was doing". Your a role model!! (Just wanted to throw some encouragement back to you.) Oh, and we are also thinking about another baby soon, probably in the fall we'll start trying again. I'll be sure to watch for you on the Fitmom's forum!!

Tricia
 
Tricia,

Thanks for the words of encouragement, it's nice to know there are other women out there who know and experience simliar thoughts/feelings/and struggles. I'm glad to see that you use Cathe for BFL. That was one reason why I was hesitant about starting...I would much rather use Cathe then make up my own. I'd like to start soon, but I am traveling for pretty much the month of May. (The grandparent's want to see their little guy for a while.) I may just end up starting just to make sure that I don't over do it on the trip. I'll have to check into the other fourms.

Thanks again!

Lindsay
 
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