school violence
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Amy Steppe
Cathlete
Me too -- sometimes I just have to get away from all the bad news.
Between horrible world affairs to violence in US schools, it is almost too much to handle!
I read in Marie Claire that the average girl in Kenya misses 5 days of school per month because she has no sanitary protection. She must sit in a hole.
Several women have started a project to get sanitary napkins to these poor girls.
And the starvation and lack of water in Sub Sahara Africa.
And all the Jon Benet like crimes.
You are so right -- it becomes hard to feel safe in a world that is out of control!
Between horrible world affairs to violence in US schools, it is almost too much to handle!
I read in Marie Claire that the average girl in Kenya misses 5 days of school per month because she has no sanitary protection. She must sit in a hole.
Several women have started a project to get sanitary napkins to these poor girls.
And the starvation and lack of water in Sub Sahara Africa.
And all the Jon Benet like crimes.
You are so right -- it becomes hard to feel safe in a world that is out of control!
This struck me the other night, when the first three stories on the LOCAL news were about kids shooting each other, calling in bombs scares to the school, on and on.
But really it's no surprise. Half the kids are being raised by parents who find it easier to be their kids' friends, rather than lead them succesfully into adulthood, and the other half aren't being raised by anyone at all, and grow up like animals. There are good parents out there of course, but honestly I think they have become the exception, not the rule. Sad to say.
Sparrow
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow - what a ride!’ — Peter Sage
But really it's no surprise. Half the kids are being raised by parents who find it easier to be their kids' friends, rather than lead them succesfully into adulthood, and the other half aren't being raised by anyone at all, and grow up like animals. There are good parents out there of course, but honestly I think they have become the exception, not the rule. Sad to say.
Sparrow
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow - what a ride!’ — Peter Sage
pink_fortitude
Banned
>I disagree with your statement that the good parents are the
>exception. I think there are far more good parents and good
>kids than bad parents and bad kids. It is just the good
>parents and good kids don't make the news......
Where do you live? I wanna move there!
I would LOVE to believe and feel how you feel, but I really don't. Two of my kids are in public schools and I can tell you there are very, very crummy parents - and there are many of them. Out of the 100 kids in both of my kids grades, there are maybe a dozen that are involved at all in their kids' school activities, and there are only two - TWO! - sets of parents that I trust either of my kids to, though there are a handful that I do like. I will be the first to admit that my standards are very high when it comes to my kids (call me a snob, that's okay!), but most of the parents that come to school events, sporting events (some don't even come at all and see it as day care!) and other activities put their kids down, yell at them, ignore them, lie to them, try to get them out of trouble with the teacher/coach when they have done something wrong or spoil them completely rotten. Kids really do run the school and it is because they have been trained at home that they can do so and show no respect whether it is because they have such low self esteem or because they have no parent. DH and I are actually going to pull our kids out of school around Christmas so I can homeschool. It honestly feels like we are putting our kids out into battle, one they are too young and immature to fight in.
Alright, I am done ranting and rambling for the day!
Missy
>exception. I think there are far more good parents and good
>kids than bad parents and bad kids. It is just the good
>parents and good kids don't make the news......
Where do you live? I wanna move there!
I would LOVE to believe and feel how you feel, but I really don't. Two of my kids are in public schools and I can tell you there are very, very crummy parents - and there are many of them. Out of the 100 kids in both of my kids grades, there are maybe a dozen that are involved at all in their kids' school activities, and there are only two - TWO! - sets of parents that I trust either of my kids to, though there are a handful that I do like. I will be the first to admit that my standards are very high when it comes to my kids (call me a snob, that's okay!), but most of the parents that come to school events, sporting events (some don't even come at all and see it as day care!) and other activities put their kids down, yell at them, ignore them, lie to them, try to get them out of trouble with the teacher/coach when they have done something wrong or spoil them completely rotten. Kids really do run the school and it is because they have been trained at home that they can do so and show no respect whether it is because they have such low self esteem or because they have no parent. DH and I are actually going to pull our kids out of school around Christmas so I can homeschool. It honestly feels like we are putting our kids out into battle, one they are too young and immature to fight in.
Alright, I am done ranting and rambling for the day!
Missy
Missy, glad to hear you have made the decision! I was thinking about your post the other day and wondering. Let us know how it goes.
Dorothy I know that there are alot of great parents out there
but I'm not basing my opinion (and that's all it is, my opinion) strictly on the news. I've worked with kids in several different jobs and done alot of volunteer work at schools, and what I have seen - and continue to see - just leaves me with my mouth hanging open. I'm sorry to sound like a old curmudgeon but when I was a kid I don't recall there being so many whining, screaming, disrespectful, backtalking kids in the world. Heck, all you really have to do is go to the grocery store or Target to see it. If this was only happening in their homes, so what, but they bring it into the public arena and I have to put up with it in stores, cafes, restaurants, and movie theatres, and that irritates me
And when I do meet or see I kid that is polite, friendly, well behaved, I take notice. Huzzah to those parents!
Sparrow
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow - what a ride!’ — Peter Sage
Dorothy I know that there are alot of great parents out there
but I'm not basing my opinion (and that's all it is, my opinion) strictly on the news. I've worked with kids in several different jobs and done alot of volunteer work at schools, and what I have seen - and continue to see - just leaves me with my mouth hanging open. I'm sorry to sound like a old curmudgeon but when I was a kid I don't recall there being so many whining, screaming, disrespectful, backtalking kids in the world. Heck, all you really have to do is go to the grocery store or Target to see it. If this was only happening in their homes, so what, but they bring it into the public arena and I have to put up with it in stores, cafes, restaurants, and movie theatres, and that irritates me And when I do meet or see I kid that is polite, friendly, well behaved, I take notice. Huzzah to those parents!
Sparrow
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow - what a ride!’ — Peter Sage
marnold
Cathlete
I know what you mean. Perplexing to me too. I have no answers. It seems that being a trusting person gets you nowhere these days. I feel like I should be looking over my shoulder every minute. What disturbs me is that seemingly pillars of our society are secretly perverted...WOW!
The news has been so awful lately that I just can't read/watch anymore. It's so upsetting.
I may be naive, but I agree with Dorothy that good parents aren't the exception. I do see negligent parents and it bothers me, but there are a lot of wonderful, involved, caring parents in our area. I don't notice all of the well-behaved kids at the store, but the bratty ones definitely make a scene so they are the ones people talk about. Same with the news.
I just helped with a middle school fundraiser this past week and was amazed at how polite, cooperative and well-behaved the students were. I didn't have a problem with one student. I thought they were a great group of kids. I do a lot of volunteer work at my kids' schools and find most of the students to be delightful.
Erica
I may be naive, but I agree with Dorothy that good parents aren't the exception. I do see negligent parents and it bothers me, but there are a lot of wonderful, involved, caring parents in our area. I don't notice all of the well-behaved kids at the store, but the bratty ones definitely make a scene so they are the ones people talk about. Same with the news.
I just helped with a middle school fundraiser this past week and was amazed at how polite, cooperative and well-behaved the students were. I didn't have a problem with one student. I thought they were a great group of kids.
I do a lot of volunteer work at my kids' schools and find most of the students to be delightful.Erica
carrie123
Cathlete
Our world has definately seen some negative changes with our children in the last decade. I believe that so many children have been hurt or knew someone that was hurt, heck even hearing about in the media over and over again has really damaged how kids today view adults. When those kids grew up and had children of their own (kids today) they really made it clear for their children not to trust other adults, and how other adults don't outright deserve respect they earn it, especially in our indivdualistic society. The media has really fostered this idea as well. Also, how many parents today actually have time to be good role models, when they are so busy working trying to make ends meet. Even if you're lucky enough to have two professional incomes in one household, the standards of living have gotten so outrageous, it's very hard to keep up with the bills. And what about the households with only one parent, how impossible that must seem.
But yes, it's so true, we have been teetering back and forth on the homeschooling idea. We are also looking for that perfect place in the world to raise our kids.
Just the other day, my ds was at his lunch table, got up to get something, left his lunch there, when he got back his drink smelled funny. It turns out someone dumped nail polish remover in it. It's currently under investigation. There are camera's in the lunch room, so we'll see. (Hard to believe there has to be cameras)
Last year my DD, was in a lockdown at the local elementary school because of a shooting across the street. I couldn't get to her, they wouldn't let me through.
We don't live in a big city, and we don't live in a "poverty" neighborhood.
I'm trying to decide to go to graduate school this Jan. for school counseling, because I feel those kids really need some guidance, but I have to admit I am a little afraid...the parents don't seem to want to trust school officials anymore, like they constantly feel they have to be fighting someone or something...
That's it...our society has fostered a "fighting" environment, everywhere you look, from the war, to PTO meetings. It has gotten out of hand. We need a peaceful role model to help settle the waters. Child abusers and domestic abusers aren't punished near enough to stop the crime from continuing into the next generation. So the kids learn it...and repeat it...There's so much crap to muddle through in this society. We are better off than some of the third world countries, but wow, if only there was a place people could feel safe and trust, (like this forum)
Carrie
http://www.3fatchicks.net/img/bar072/slider-but5/lb/209/145/189.4/.png[/image][/link]
But yes, it's so true, we have been teetering back and forth on the homeschooling idea. We are also looking for that perfect place in the world to raise our kids.
Just the other day, my ds was at his lunch table, got up to get something, left his lunch there, when he got back his drink smelled funny. It turns out someone dumped nail polish remover in it. It's currently under investigation. There are camera's in the lunch room, so we'll see. (Hard to believe there has to be cameras)
Last year my DD, was in a lockdown at the local elementary school because of a shooting across the street. I couldn't get to her, they wouldn't let me through.
We don't live in a big city, and we don't live in a "poverty" neighborhood.
I'm trying to decide to go to graduate school this Jan. for school counseling, because I feel those kids really need some guidance, but I have to admit I am a little afraid...the parents don't seem to want to trust school officials anymore, like they constantly feel they have to be fighting someone or something...
That's it...our society has fostered a "fighting" environment, everywhere you look, from the war, to PTO meetings. It has gotten out of hand. We need a peaceful role model to help settle the waters. Child abusers and domestic abusers aren't punished near enough to stop the crime from continuing into the next generation. So the kids learn it...and repeat it...There's so much crap to muddle through in this society. We are better off than some of the third world countries, but wow, if only there was a place people could feel safe and trust, (like this forum
)Carrie
http://www.3fatchicks.net/img/bar072/slider-but5/lb/209/145/189.4/.png[/image][/link]
deanie
Cathlete
Sparrow,
Unfortunatly I totally agree with you. Last year I subbed in the lunch room and for recess at my sons' elementary school. I was VERY disheartened. The lack of respect, the treatment of others, I could go on and on. One third grader tried to stare me down when I gave his friend a time out for not listening to me(throwing mulch) A third grader!!!! My sons' kindergarten teacher (she is in her late 50's, teaching for years) and I have had numerous discussions about it. It is true- so many parents think it is more important to be their childs friend. So many families have both parents working full time, when they get home, no one wants to be the bad guy. Also, in my sons nursery school, they now offer classes to be extended till 2 pm, I know many SAHMs who use this extra time for themselves instead of spending time with their child. I was one of the few SAHMs who were happy my son went to half day kind. last year. I am also one of the few moms who don't "threaten" because when I say something is going to happen if bad behavior continues, it does. Even my mom says I am fighting a losing battle, for every parent like me, there are 5-6 others who are not disciplining their children or who let their kids do what they want. So many kids are in charge at home they think they are in charge everywhere- scarry! Sorry this is so long, but Ireally feel strongly about where it is going and when are parents going to become parents again?
Deanie
eta: there are good kids out there and there are good parents out there, there just aren't as many as there could be.
Unfortunatly I totally agree with you. Last year I subbed in the lunch room and for recess at my sons' elementary school. I was VERY disheartened. The lack of respect, the treatment of others, I could go on and on. One third grader tried to stare me down when I gave his friend a time out for not listening to me(throwing mulch) A third grader!!!! My sons' kindergarten teacher (she is in her late 50's, teaching for years) and I have had numerous discussions about it. It is true- so many parents think it is more important to be their childs friend. So many families have both parents working full time, when they get home, no one wants to be the bad guy. Also, in my sons nursery school, they now offer classes to be extended till 2 pm, I know many SAHMs who use this extra time for themselves instead of spending time with their child. I was one of the few SAHMs who were happy my son went to half day kind. last year. I am also one of the few moms who don't "threaten" because when I say something is going to happen if bad behavior continues, it does. Even my mom says I am fighting a losing battle, for every parent like me, there are 5-6 others who are not disciplining their children or who let their kids do what they want. So many kids are in charge at home they think they are in charge everywhere- scarry! Sorry this is so long, but Ireally feel strongly about where it is going and when are parents going to become parents again?
Deanie
eta: there are good kids out there and there are good parents out there, there just aren't as many as there could be.
CoralOcean57
Cathlete
There are a lot of unruly kids out there nowadays, but honestly, I think there always were. I remember when I went to school (many, many years ago), there were always kids who were disrespectful, who fought other kids, teased other kids, whatever. I remember in 4th or 5th grade, I got a new patent leather book bag. I loved it! One day a kid in my class sat on it and ruined it. Maybe not as harmful as putting nail polish in a drink, but still a total disregard for others' property and/or well being. There were always parents who neglected their kids, too, and never went to school functions, etc. Maybe it just gets more attention now because the media goes over the top with everything now. And maybe we're more aware now how detrimental certain parental behaviors are and they get noticed more.
Parents can always find the time to be involved with their kids no matter how busy they are. All of my spare time is spent with my family. And I know some parents who are never with their kids and this was the same way years ago, too. Bad parenting is unfortunately not new, and good parenting is just as possible today as it always was.
Parents can always find the time to be involved with their kids no matter how busy they are. All of my spare time is spent with my family. And I know some parents who are never with their kids and this was the same way years ago, too. Bad parenting is unfortunately not new, and good parenting is just as possible today as it always was.
lala1
Cathlete
I am a public school teacher and every once in a while I do think about the possiblity of a Columbine-type killing spree in my school district. I work in one of the best districts in my state, but realize that this type of thing can happen anywhere, just note the recent assasination of a school prinicpal in rural WI. i have great support from my school administration and our classrooms are well-controlled. Unfortunately, there is a lot of crap that goes on in the halls and outside of the classroom, but don't blame the schools and teachers. and it's not just the home life of the students, it's the treatment they give to one another that can be disturbing.
However, at the same time I am a parent and to say that most parents now-a-days are bad and that the good ones are few and far between is simply not true. I have high standards for my kids and am still able to trust their judgement in friends without limiting them to one or two. It's a difficult world to manuever through, but it can be done. there is no one thing upon which to put the blame.
However, at the same time I am a parent and to say that most parents now-a-days are bad and that the good ones are few and far between is simply not true. I have high standards for my kids and am still able to trust their judgement in friends without limiting them to one or two. It's a difficult world to manuever through, but it can be done. there is no one thing upon which to put the blame.