sad

K

kariev

Cathlete
Hi guys. I just need to vent a little as I'm in a sad spot right now. First, my poor little sunny bear has to go in for surgery tomorrow. He has a tumor on his paw that may be melanoma:( The vet will remove it tomorrow and then send it to the lab to see if it is cancer. If it is, he will have to have a few toes amputated. He's getting up there in age (12 years old) but I just can't imagine my life without him. Its like I projecting the worst before it even happens. His blood work came back perfect and x-rays of his chest and abdomin show now tumors so that is positive.

Next, my mom currently owns 2 homes. Both of which she is going to put on the market because she wants to move out east (she is currently in western broward county in florida) which will put her closer to my husband and I. This is great as my mom and I are close but the sad part is, I feel like I'm losing another part of my dad by selling these houses. He passed away 8 years ago and I have some good memories of him in these homes. I know it is hard for my mom as well but she is looking to simplify her life a bit and I just want her to be happy.

And last, my brother is going through a relapse with his drugs and alcohol. I'm so afraid he is going to die. My world would be shattered if I lost him. I just want him to get better but he has to do it on his own. I've noticed that as I get older, one of my biggest life fears is losing loved ones around me to death. I know most of that stems from my fathers death. Because of this, I often distance myself from forming new relationships. Sadly I even keep some distance from my own husband because I'm so afraid of the hurt I would feel if something would happen to him.

Today has just been such an emotional day for me. I can't stop crying. I keep trying to distract myself and not focus on all of this but I can't get it out of my head. I'm sorry to unload on this board but I just needed someone to listen and get stuff off my chest. Its been months since I have binged on food to numb myself from feelings. Feeling feelings are tough and very uncomfortable. I don't have the urge to binge of food anymore as I know it will not help in the end but now I can really see why I did it for so long.
 
I'm sorry. Sometimes life just throws a crap load at you at once.

Take it one day at a time. Your sunny bear is gonna be just fine after surgery.
You are not losing your Dad, his memory is forever in your heart. Losing the home is not losing his memory. I'm sure it might be a new start for you mom also.

Your brother - Oy. He is going to have to make the choice to stay clean.

We can lose loved ones at any time and when you do, you realize that you must love the ones around you daily. You never know when they will be gone. You only have today.

So hug those around you today, take it one day at a time, and go ahead and cry it out. It will be ok.
 
{{{Kariev}}}}

That is a lot to deal with all at once. Make sure you take care of yourself, get enough sleep and rest, and eat well (multiple stresses like this can take a toll on your immune system).

My best wishes (and those of my cats!) to your sunny bear (cat or dog?). Hope all goes well.

I can empathize with not wanting to see the house sold. My stepmother got remarried 2 years ago, and one of the things she was going to do is sell the house I grew up in (from "2 days old"! to when I left for college, with several stays after that). It was the only house I ever new when I lived with my parents (dad died in 1989). She ended up turning it into a kind of a half-way house for women needing a place to stay...but I don't think I can ever go there again, as it isn't "home" anymore.
 
Thank you both for your kind words. It sure does seem like life throws a ton all at once but this too shall pass. I haven't cried like this in a long time. My sunny bear is a dog by the way. I call him my adopted son because my husband had him before we even met. I will keep you all posted about his recovery and the outcome. I really thank you both for sharing your thoughts. Its nice to know i'm not alone.
 
That really is quite a bit to be shouldering all at once. I think it's OK to just cry it all out, I think it helps to just let your emotions take over sometimes.

{{{{Hugs}}}} to you, hang in there, you are not alone.
 
Prayers to you. You have a lot going on right now. Try to just take it one day at a time. Know that others are thinking of you.
 
So I'm happy to report that my little Sunny Bear is doing well. The vet thinks that the lump is just a cyst but we won't know for sure until we get the results from the lab. I'm so excited to go and pick him up. I cried like a little baby dropping him off this morning. I wish they could understand english so we could explain things to them. Anyways, thanks for all the thoughts and prayers:)
 
kariev,

I'm so glad your baby is going to be okay. I've been in the same position with my dog and though he's okay right now......it's a constant wait and see. But I'm really happy sunny bear is doing well. :)

I hope the rest of your troubles go as smoothly. Life is difficult sometimes but it always gets better.
 
kariev,

Just wanted to say I'm glad your Sunny Bear is doing well. I have cried over my dog's health just like I have my kids'. I'm sorry you are going through a lot right now. There have been times in my life I have felt like I was drowning in my sorrows and the best thing was to spill it out to someone. Hugs to you and prayers that all will be well.

Julie
 
Good to hear the good news about Sunny Bear. At least that should be some weight off your shoulders.
(And I do think that animals understand us in many ways, even if they don't speak our human languages).
 
Kariev,

I am SO happy to hear about your Sunny Bear! I remember going into the vet after finding a lump on the dog love of my life, convinced it was cancer but overcome with relief to find out it was a cyst (He lived for 7 more years after that). I KNOW you must have hugged him A LOT today...the pup and the vet!

All the best, in all the things you are dealing with right now.

BIG HUGS!

:)Jonezie
 
YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST!!!!!! The positive support I get from this forum is so wonderful. Thank you all again. It means a lot to me. Even though we have never met in person, I view people on this forum as friends:)
 
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