Remembering my Sister

chachi

chachi

Cathlete
Hi All,

I've been sitting at my computer since 3:30am mostly lurking through the forum trying to avoid life today. You see today is the 7th anniversary of my sister's death. She was killed by a drunk driver when she was 21 years old. I'm feeling pretty ashamed...like I should be doing something today worthwhile instead of sitting here in my pj's wanting to crawl in a hole and stay there for a long while.

She was such a bright shining star, she loved life and lived it to the fullest everyday. She was beautiful both inside and out. She was so much fun...she was my best friend. I just miss her so very much everyday. I don't understand why I dread this day so much every year...it just paralyzes me ;(

Sorry to be such a downer especially since I don't really post so you all don't really know me. I'm here quite often and feel comfortable here. Maybe that's why I finally chose this forum to let some of this out today. I feel a little better just knowing that I've allowed her memory to carry on here to any of you who read this.

I know I'm not the only one suffering from the unbearable grief of losing someone you love so very much. Some of you are going through difficult times right now with loved ones and I'm praying for you. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone for talking about this here I know I could've gone to a different forum more appropriate but like I mentioned earlier this is my daily support group even though I don't post. We all have one thing in common...we love Cathe and appreciate all that she has done to contribute to our lives. Luckily today my rotation calls for a day off...I'm sure if I tried working out today I'd end up twisting an ankle since my head is not into it.

I think I'm going to try and take my weiner dogs out for a walk...it's beautiful here today. Maybe some fresh air will help lift my spirits and I know my sister Heather would want me to get outside and take in life.

Thanks in advance for reading I know I've carried on...sorry!

Take Care and enjoy your weekend,

Chastity

P.S. If you have time please check out Heather's memorial website :)

http://iam.homewithgod.com/heather/index.html

http://www.picturetrail.com:80/chastgirl0205
 
Hi Chastity!

Sending BIG (((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))your way. I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time today. Please don't think you're offending anyone with your post. We're all here for each other and you should feel comfortable coming here any time. Your sister was beautiful and I think it's wonderful she was able to touch people's lives and with the people's lives that she saved. She will live on forever.

Marcy
 
Chasty - [font color=darkviolet size=+2]<<<HUGS>>>[/font]http://bestsmileys.com/hugging/6.gif
 
Oh Chastity, I'm so sorry. Sending HUGE squeezy hugs your way. Please don't ever think you'd offend us with a post like that. I'm honoured that you trust in us enough to share such deep, heartfelt emotion.

Your sister was beautiful. It's always hard to lose someone so young with so much potential and life ahead!

I say spend the day snuggling those weiner dogs, and yes, take them out for a walk. You'll all feel better for it:)
 
{{{{{Chachi}}}}} I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine losing my sister, especially in such a senseless and preventable way. Your memorial website is a beautiful tribute to her.

There's nothing like walking a wiener dog to lift ones spirits:)
 
Chastity,
I wish I could give you a great big hug. I too lost my sister when she was 27. That was almost twenty years ago. I still think of her everyday. That does not mean that it consumes my world, just that something reminds me of her and I can smile now. We were 11 months apart and I miss her very much. I know what you mean about anniversaries. It is normal - believe me. Someone I know lost her brother and she planted a garden in her yard in memory of him. It was done in colors that he would have liked. I thought that was so special. You might try and think of something you could do like that to be a good reminder of your sister. I checked out your sisters memorial website and I cried for both of you. What a nice tribute to her. She was beautiful. Roll with this day the best you can, allow yourself to feel what you are feeling and know that you are not alone.
 
Chastity,

I'm sending you hugs today. Your sister was truly beautiful. Please take time for yourself today and allow yourself to feel what you need to feel. You have a beautiful angel in heaven who is looking out for you.

My thoughts are with you on this day.

Take care,
 
I checked out the site. It is beautiful. Heather was beautiful. I'm so terribly sorry for the loss of such a bright light in your family. ((HUGS))
 
Thank you all so very much for your hugs and support. You are all such wonderfully compassionate ladies. The tears are finally falling...I've felt pretty numb until now. I hate to sound selfish but I didn't realize how much I needed the support. My DH is out of town working this weekend, my family is in Miami and my closest friend is 3 hours away. It's just me and the babies (my weiners) and they have also been showering me with kisses and cuddles today. It so amazing how they sense things and know when mommy needs extra love :)

JenG I'm so sorry you lost your sister at such a young age as well. Thank you for your advice. I love that you mentioned your friend planted a garden in memory of her brother. I have also done the same. I have multiple flower gardens throughout my yard that attract butterflies. Heather loved them so very much...it brings me comfort everytime I see one fluttering through my yard :)

I finally got dressed...now I just need to get myself moving.

So grateful to you all,
Chastity

http://iam.homewithgod.com/heather/index.html

http://www.picturetrail.com:80/chastgirl0205
 
[font size=+2 color=orchid]((((Hugs))))[/font]

Chastity, ny heart goes out to you. Don't worry about being a downer - this is such a supportive community. We are all here for you. :)
 
Dear Chastity:

I am so deeply moved by your post. I am so sorry your loss. I am sure that she is sooo proud of you, you are beautiful inside and out!

You are fully entitled to have all the feelings you are experiencing today!!! And I welcome you to share as you feel comfortable. This forum is a wonderful safe place. Do not apologize any longer!!! You are healing and still grieving, it is only natural.

Do you ever have a chance to listen to Dr. Robin on Oprah's XM channel? She has experienced tragedy and she has wonderful advice too. You can even write her or call her and ask questions. She understands this type of pain well, I believe her husband died suddenly on the beach while on vacation.

Also, I would like to recommend 2 books to you (perhaps you have already read them)...90 minutes in heaven by Don Piper and Have You Felt Like Giving Up Lately by David Wilkerson. Wonderful books to help nourish your soul.

I visited your website for Heather...It is beautiful and you deserve praise for the job you did there! I wish that Heather were still with you.

How old are you now?? Please allow yourself to do whatever your heart tells you to do, everyone grieves differently. And as I discovered in the book, Have you felt like giving up lately, time DOES NOT heal all wounds, but time will allow you space to work through this journey. God is always always there for you, he loves you with all his heart!

Bless you and please feel free to share anytime!!

xoxo, Denise
 
Loved the site...the wedding pic of Heather as an angel was especially nice!

Great job of keeping her memory alive!!

Jerr
 
More hugs for you over here. You are lucky to have some fuzzy dachshunds to keep you company. They are true therapy dogs. ;-)
 
Hugs to you Chastity. We recently lost a dear friend to cancer, everyday I swear I hear his laugh, his voice in everything I do. I talk to him and ask him what heaven is like, share jokes with him and try to remember all the good times. Other times I sit and cannot believe he isn't here physically anymore, it really hurts.

I think taking your sweet doggies out for a walk and "being" with Heather today in the beautiful sunshine would be a great idea.
Please know there are many people here who are so wonderful and supportive here, please post anytime you want or need to.:)
 
Chastity,Im so sorry for your lose.Im also sending big hugs your way! Your sister was just beautiful! And the website brought me to tears....Thank you for sharing!
 
So sorry for your loss. Another reminder to appreciate every day that we do have with our loved ones, as we never know when someone may be taken from us. Deb
 
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