Nervous about seeing old friends from HS

[spyrosmom]

I am going to a baby shower on Sun for one of my good friends from HS. She lives a few hours away, so we only see each other once or twice a year. Her parents still live up here, so the shower is here. There will be some mutual friends there from back in the day that she still keeps in touch with, that I really don't. No particular reason, just going off to college, drifting apart, etc. No fights, hatred, or anything like that. A few of the ladies I've recently come across on Facebook and we are FB friends, but again no real contact. I was the fat girl in HS, with all that implies. Friends were thinner, with all that implies. HS politics and all that. I'm 31 now, so have been out of HS for 13 years or so now. I look better and feel better than I ever did, and am proud of myself. I am a size 10 (was an 18 in HS and a TIGHT 22 at my max) which I really don't have an issue with, but I still have the lower belly baby pooch - damn kid

So here's my "issue" and I know its a self esteem issue. Every now and then I get in a self esteem funk. Most of the time, I'm all good. I post my Cathe workouts on FB thru the workout manager and I also was posting up my 100 pushup challenge, and the occasional other fitness tidbit, like if I signed up for a run or whatever. Its my lifestyle, its what I do. I somehow have it in my head, that all these ladies are going to think that I'm a size 2, catwalking supermodel (yes, I'm exaggerating) and are going to think I'm full of hoos-foos when they see me. Are they really thinking "I can't wait to see what Nan looks like on Sun"? No, and I know better. But I'm sure you all understand how that self doubt creeps in.

They're there for the same reason as me - to go to the baby shower. Yet, I have to admit I am curious to see how some of them look. And I would be somewhat nastily, mean-girls happy if some of the extra thin ones were a bit on the pudgier side now. Gotta make sure I have my best look-thin, casual outfit clean and ready to go, too.

At Christmastime, I saw the friend whose shower it is. I picked her up at her mom's house and we went out for dinner. I hadn't seen her mom in years - and her mom said if she didn't know it was me, she wouldn't have recognized me, which was a huge compliment.

Am I paranoid? Crazy? A little evil for wishing them some pudginess? It just seems for all the working out I do, they are going to be weirded out seeing my at my size, which is not huge, and not being itty-bitty. Methinks I'm just nutty.

Nan

 

[spicegirl]

Nan....I know it's easier said then done....but you are being way to hard on yourself! Go to that Shower, hold your head up high and have a ball seeing all your old friends. Oh...they'll be talking alright!......about how GREAT you look now. All they remember, is that girl you used to be 13 years ago!!!

Oh....and it's OK to feel the way you do. I think it's completly normal....

Have a great time!

 

[Miss Lee]

I don't have any great words of wisdom for you, but I totally agree that everyone will be talking about how GREAT you look!! I can understand your apprehension, but I also know that, at least on the forums, you have a wonderful personality and a wicked sense of humor, both of which will carry you through the shower. Go and have a great time!! And I bet you will look better than most everyone there. I mean, MY GOD WOMAN! You can do 100 consecutive push-ups!!!!

 

[Jonezie]

Nan...I second the 100 pushup thing. If you're feeling low at the shower, you could always exclaim "Watch this!" and drop and give 'em 100. Even 50, and everyone would be like "Wow, that was the best baby shower EVER!"

PS...If you still feel self-conscious about the lower belly "pooch," I have just one word for you, sister...SPANX. They cure everything that ails you. I'm convinced they would be the answer to world peace if our world leaders would just put them on.

PS...Make sure and come back to tell us how fabulous it was after it's over, yes?

Jonezie

 

[morningstar]

So here's my "issue" and I know its a self esteem issue. Every now and then I get in a self esteem funk. Most of the time, I'm all good. I post my Cathe workouts on FB thru the workout manager and I also was posting up my 100 pushup challenge, and the occasional other fitness tidbit, like if I signed up for a run or whatever. Its my lifestyle, its what I do. I somehow have it in my head, that all these ladies are going to think that I'm a size 2, catwalking supermodel (yes, I'm exaggerating) and are going to think I'm full of hoos-foos when they see me. Are they really thinking "I can't wait to see what Nan looks like on Sun"? No, and I know better. But I'm sure you all understand how that self doubt creeps in.

I'm going through the EXACT same issue- haven't seen my mom in years, I'm seeing her in a couple of weeks, she knows I work out, she knows I lost a lot of weight, I'm afraid she's expecting someone super skinny. Well, I may have lost a lot of weight, and I'm very fit, but I still have lots of body fat and I really don't want to hear her remarks. Major issues with my mom underlying that, of course. So, no suggestions from me, but I'd love to hear it if others have some help for us.

 

[dorothyrd]

Even if you are not a size 2, your healthy lifestyle is going to make you glow at whatever size you are. Plus, must of these ladies have not seen you since you were an 18? You will look thin to them, I promise. In all likelyhood, they will look good too, and you will all laugh and have a grand time!

 

[kathryn]

You should be proud of yourself and not selfconscious.
As for the 'lower belly baby pooch': there's no shame in that. It came along with a wonderful child! And that's something easy to disguise with clothing.

I'd bet that in the intervening 13 years, some of your HS friends have gained weight (at my 10 year class reunion, several of the 'pretty and slim' people from HS had put on some pounds, and were no longer that pretty or slim any more) and they also are a bit nervous about getting together.

Try not to focus on externals, but to enjoy the company of old friends and get to know them again (not what any of you look like, but who you all are right now).

 

[gogigi]

What Kathryn said...I'm so proud of all that you've accomplished and the active lifestyle you are living is a great example to many. I hope you go have a great time. Be yourself and enjoy!!!