Losing your Best Friend....(VENT)

(((Wendy))) I haven't read the other posts but omg you should still go out with them. I know it's tough but I think the road you face if you don't go is even harder!

Good for you for crying on DH's shoulder. More (((((hugs)))))
 
Awww, Wendy....super (((hugs))) to you. I am so sorry this happened. I, too, had a really good friend I lost many years ago for reasons I still don't understand...but I do believe things happen for a reason, whatever that may be. I am always around to talk if you need it :*



Debbie


A penny for your thoughts? Let me get you some change.
 
Oh Wendy....I know these kinds of situations can be tough!;( I am kinda in the same situtation but our friendship doesn't go back as far AND I am kind of the one pulling away.
I have been friends with this one girl for about 6 yrs now. We got close fast and got along great. Throughout the yrs she as become more high maintance and Im not even sure I know who she is anymore.
Ex: the other day she had a wedding to go to...so she colored her hair to match the dress!!!!!:eek: How weird is that? Now...THATS high maintance!
The other day she was partying with a bunch of girls and never even invited myself or the other girl we hang out with.She lied to the girls and said that I was working and that the other friends kid was sick! Needless to say, she found out that we weren't impressed but never did apologize for it.
I can't completely cut myself off from her b/c we own a business together. I don't work there but DH and my friend does. She says that she doesn't call me b/c she finds out everything she needs to know from DH...nice hey? I just don't think I have that much in common with her anymore.
I still have lots of other friends but I would like to have more. My SIL is moving home soon, so that will be great. I did meet a girl at a party the other night that just moved into town and is having trouble making friends...(this isn't the friendliest town) so I feel like getting to know her better.
Have you told her how you feel? I know its tough but why not say something like " I miss you. I feel like I never get to see you anymore?"

Good Luck!

Lori:)
 
Wow Wendy, I could have written your post (minus the kid angle). I seem to be really good at losing best friends. At first, it was friends who got married before me and then were too busy with the whole "married" thing to do anything with their "single" friend. Then I got married and my college bud pretty much ditched me. Now, it's alienation from my friend who have kids. Every time we plan a get together, it gets canceled because one of the kids is sick. I know kids get sick, but in the last 7 years, she hasn't found one chance to get together with me? In the end, I think the best friends are the online ones. ;)
 
I have to admit, I'd a tad jealous of the fictional Carrie Bradshaw and her super cool and super available chick posse. Alas, there is no such posse for moi ;-)
 
Beavs...I'll be part of your posse (I call being Samantha!!!)}( But I won't spend hundreds of dollars for a pair of shoes, or wear minks. Can't we just drink, flirt with boys, and you can feed me yogurt when I too depressed to eat???
 
Wendy, I just wanted to send you some support and {{{HUGS}}}. You're a special person, and anybody would be nuts not to keep you as a friend.
 
I just saw this and am sending you Hugs Wendy! It happens and it is not easy to endure. I hope you consider going out with your friends and realize that you may be friends, but not Best friends.

Right now my oldest friend in the world and I are at complete opposites on our political views, and she is quite outspoken about hers. It is not an easy time for us. But we have been friends since before Kindergarten, and we will survive. We only see each other on rare occasions now but we try to have some good phone visits. Her friendship is too valuable to let the lack of frequent visits or political views get in the way.

You have many friends right here in Catheville. I have truly enjoyed getting to know you since you started posting while pregnant with Joey! And on one of my visits to NJ, to see family, we ARE going to meet up! PS you are always welcome to western NY to visit!


[font color=lime green][font size +3]Judy "Likes2bfit"


http://www.picturetrail.com/jafitmama
 
I love the stories and words of wisdom, and it was especially helpful to hear from women without kids.

I have found online friendships to be very beneficial, and I've often wondered why. I think it's because:

1. It's more convenient time-wise. You can choose when to engage, which could mean 1 am if necessary. Can't do that via phone or face-to-face.

2. The partial or total anonymity the internet provides seems to allow for a more open exchange between people. This has been a bit funny for me, as I tend to be pretty open both online and face-to-face. The few times I've met online buddies in person, I was my usual open self, and they were quite reserved and shy (very different from their online behavior). I was way thrown off!

3. Online communities cast a wider net, and you're likely to find people who click with you much faster.

Of course, it's not the same as in-person friendships (plus I think our face to face communication skills as a society might suffer). I wouldn't say one replaces the other. But the online friendship circle has its advantages.

I loved all the replies, but A-Jock's really resonated with me. I view friendships very differently now, not needing them so much but not refusing any that come my way either. I just kind of..."be," you know? I try to enjoy whatever connection I have with different people, no matter how big or small. *shrug*

I send you all my very best cyber ((hugs)). <3 :)
 
Wendy I was thinking about you this morning and I bet your friend is feeling the same way, maybe for different reasons. I expect she missed your friendship as much as you do.

More hugs,
 
>I'll hook you up with a margarita Wendy ;-)

Yummy! Though I'd actually prefer a martini if ya don't mind! ;) :9 }(
 
>I just saw this and am sending you Hugs Wendy! It happens
>and it is not easy to endure. I hope you consider going out
>with your friends and realize that you may be friends, but
>not Best friends.
>
>Right now my oldest friend in the world and I are at complete
>opposites on our political views, and she is quite outspoken
>about hers. It is not an easy time for us. But we have been
>friends since before Kindergarten, and we will survive. We
>only see each other on rare occasions now but we try to have
>some good phone visits. Her friendship is too valuable to let
>the lack of frequent visits or political views get in the
>way.
>
>You have many friends right here in Catheville. I have truly
>enjoyed getting to know you since you started posting while
>pregnant with Joey! And on one of my visits to NJ, to see
>family, we ARE going to meet up! PS you are always welcome to
>western NY to visit!

Thanks Judy! You are the best!

Hey, maybe a couple of us Cheetahs could get together and wrangle a weekend Judy visit in the coming months! That would be nifty! :)
 
>Awww, Wendy....super (((hugs))) to you. I am so sorry this
>happened. I, too, had a really good friend I lost many years
>ago for reasons I still don't understand...but I do believe
>things happen for a reason, whatever that may be. I am always
>around to talk if you need it :*

Oh Debbie! I think about you often and continually mean to get back in touch with you and it just never happens. I'm so sorry we lost touch! :-( We'll have to get back to emailing and chatting again very soon okay? :+
 
Wendy, after knowing you on this forum the past three years I can say for a fact that you are such a kind, caring and genuine person and I am so sad to read about what is going on. Sadly, the same thing happened to me, too. I only have one friend from when I was in school, and she didn't even start trying to connect w/ me again until she had her son (so not all hope is lost!). It has nothing to do w/ you, really it doesn't. It doesn't mean that she loves you any less, you are just in a phase of life that scares her because it is something she doesn't understand. She knows you how you were, and now you are a mom w/ more responsibilities and you probably have changed and grown because of it. Your focus has become your son and family - which it should be - and she is just searching for someone who is still in her phase of life. It is natural to want to be around people who are in the same stage as you are, but unfortunately that doesn't make it hurt less... and she probably feels the same way you do to a certain extent. My heart really does go out to you, and I am giving you the biggest cyber hugs!!!

With a post count of almost 16,000 it's hard to believe that you are shy and can't make friends easily ;) There is someone waiting for you just around the corner to create new memories w/, Wendy. You are just so sweet it is hard for me to imagine that it would be difficult to make friends. :D

Missy
 
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