Laura - Cesar advice that might help for Max

Darnit, I couldn't open this, got an error message. I've been googling for the last 3 days & can't seem to find any free advice (there were a few sites but they required membership). But thank you Donna for thinking of me--you're very sweet!

The more I think about it the more I think it's b/c I'm just not home enough for him. I really need to re-adjust my schedule. I'm gonna have a talk w/my boss about maybe taking mornings off after night mtgs--I'm working 2-3 nights a week now, I'm at the gym 2 nights a week, so I really only have Friday nights & Saturdays with him. Normally I'd have Sundays too (usually spend mornings at the gym & the rest of the day at home) but w/the house up for sale I've been banished from my place for open houses, & I'm sure those are traumatic for him too (being crated while a bunch of strangers tromp thru his home cannot be easy for the poor little fella).

And I think after lunch I'm gonna start leaving him out of his crate. I take a late lunch so it's only for a few hours. I started b/c I did Barkbusters w/Max when he was misbehaving & the trainer told me crating was an absolute must. Now that he's a good dog I think I'll give him the choice.

Thanks to everyone for their advice & support--any other thoughts would be welcome.
 
>Normally I'd have Sundays
>too (usually spend mornings at the gym & the rest of the day
>at home) but w/the house up for sale I've been banished from
>my place for open houses, & I'm sure those are traumatic for
>him too (being crated while a bunch of strangers tromp thru
>his home cannot be easy for the poor little fella).

I would think that would be hard for him, especially coming so soon after his pal Cosmo leaving.

Can you take him with you whereever you are when the open houses are going on?
 
Unfortunately no. I go to my cousin's house--she lives about a mile away. Problem is she has a 140 lb rottweiler. I'e considered bringing him with me--Jet is really a very sweet dog but he's so darned big I'm afraid in the course of playing he'd hurt Max by accident. I mean, can you imagine a 140 lb dog playing w/a 25 lb dog? The possibilities for injury are endless........

My next door neighbor/best friend has 5 cats & a dog. My other good friend/training partner has 6 cockateils (they are the nastiest animals! One of them--her "favorite" oddly enough--bit her on the face last week & she had to get 6 stitches!) and is allergic to dogs. I don't know anyone else well enough to impose on them this way.

I don't have any other options as far as spending 4 hours somewhere on a Sunday other than the mall. I don't think they'd want him there. ;(
 
Laura,

Have you considered paying someone to take him for walks while you're at work? An acquaintance of mine does this for a living. With a lot of two-income households and people taking vacations, she's always in demand. Depending on her client's needs, she comes over at regularly scheduled times to feed their animals, let them out, give any required medicines, and sometimes walk them. Of course, you'd need to find a reputable person you trust with your house key. Just a thought.
 
OK - don't know why you get the error, so I'm copying and pasting it for you.

Posted March 8, 2007

Hi Cesar,

My 9 year-old Rottweiler has stopped eating since my husband and I separated. My husband has been deployed for most of the marriage so for the first 45-90 days, it was not an issue.

Then last month, our dog—who has never had a problem eating—stopped eating. Then she lost all interest in her favorite toys. For years, we’ve gone for our 45 minute to over an hour walk. Now she loses interest and sometimes doesn’t want to leave the house. I’ve tried taking her to new places for walks and to get her interested again in life but nothing seems to work. She has lost so much weight, I see her ribs now. No eating at all.

I’ve been to vets, and they say there is nothing more they can do. Please, my girl is suffering; can you give me some advice? What can I do?


Cesar's answer:

Since your dog has already seen a doctor, we know that her problem is not medical; it is psychological. Your dog is going through mourning. She was comfortable with the pack as it was and was attached to the two energies of you and your husband. Now that those two energies don’t live in the same house, she has to go through a transformation, a very deep transformation, to learn how to live without that energy.

If this situation lasts three or four days, I would recommend giving her space and letting her go through it. Do not add to the pain by feeling desperate or sorry for her. When we feel too sorry for our dogs, it sends them weak energy, and it prevents them from moving on successfully.

However, it seems like this may have been going on for a longer period of time. If that is the case, get primal help; often another dog can help create a different state of mind. Take her to visit friends who have happy-go-lucky or calm-submissive dogs. Dogs with any other states of mind besides those two would not be healthy for her. As I often find with my pack at the Dog Psychology Center, other, healthier members of their own species can have a powerful effect on our dogs that often, we as humans sometimes cannot provide.

If you need further assistance, I always advise consulting a local professional.

Stay calm and assertive – your dog really needs your strong, positive energy right now!



Cesar Millan
 
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