Kids birthday parties

L

lynne12

Cathlete
Ok - I hope I don't offend anyone here by saying this - but I really believe birthday parties have gotten out of hand, at least, where I live (Ontario, Canada)

Parents no longer hold b-day parties for thier kids at home - they rent special kids' halls, complete with massive jungle gyms, bouncy things, rides, video games etc..

the other day, we went to a b-day party for a 5 year old and, get this: there were 36 kids there! 36!! the present table was as big as you'd see at any wedding! There's no way in my mind a 5 year old needs over 20 presents! No way!

Then, the food! Nothing healthy to be seen. On the tables? cheesies, chips, cheese doodles etc. supper? order-in pizza and chips and coke, orange sodapop and water. Of course, dessert was cake and that's to be expected.

But holy birthday parties batman - why so big? and it seems every b-day party my sons are invited to are the same - big halls rented, junk food, way too many presents and way too many kids running around full of sugar! Yuck!

I guess I'm a freak. I still do bday parties at home and I limit the number of kids we invite and serve fruit for snacks and sandwiches for a meal, and, of course, cake & milk for dessert. I'd never even think of serving coke or orange soda pop to 5 year olds. maybe my sons friends will make fun of us one day - "your mom serves yucky food at your boring parties!" Gee I hope not.

Excessive is the word I use. I just can't believe it!!!
 
Hi Lynne. Funny you brought this up :) My friend's daughter had her bday party recently and it was craaaazaaay - she rented out the park in her neighborhood, had a kid's musical group play, had TONS of people (& presents to boot) and food you would see at an adult party (huge hoagie sandwiches, chicken marsala, kielbasa, fancy desserts, etc. Well if I was ever going to throw this kind of party, it would definitely be for an adult. why go so crazy when the child won't even remember it. You're right, it's for the parents at this point. Parties have really gotten out of hand, I agree.


"you miss 100% of the shots you never take"

Debbie
 
hi Lynne!

I don't have kids but my sis does and she complains about this all the time, especially the current trend of being expected to invite *every* kid in the class, even the ones her kids aren't friendly with! She refuses to do this though.

Last Halloween I helped her throw a b-day party for her son. He had nine kids or so. We really did it up with the spooky theme, I made bone cookies, etc. My nephew had a great time, but I have to say that most of the kids didn't even notice the fun stuff! I think because every bday party they go to is an *event* that nothing thrills them anymore!

That, and alot of them just had horrible manners and behavior. :(

Sparrow

__________________
www.scifichics.com
 
That hasn't happened so much with my DD's friends. Most parties are fairly small. Last year for her birthday, she had a few girls over. They were told to come in their pj's and I set up the living room like a big slumber party (she's a bit young for a REAL slumber party, IMO), and they watched a movie and ate some snacks, then they had cake and ice cream and presents.

This year, because she's a huge Harry Potter fiend and the new movie comes out just days before her birthday, we're going to the movies to see HP with a few of her friends. The movie theatre throws in a party room for an hour and food and it's really reasonable.

But yes, the parties are out of control. A woman I work with lives in a very ritzy neighbourhood, and her DD went to a birthday party last year with about 16 little girls (5 or so years old). It was a ballet theme. All the little girls got a ballet outfit, shoes included, they hire a ballet teacher to teach them a dance which they then performed for the parents. And the loot bags all had BARBIES in them. Barbies... in loot bags. It's insane.
 
yeah it does sound out of hand. I think its because no parent wants to be accused of excluding someone! I know the feeling - but really, who has the $$$ to throw a party for a whole class? And why would my son want to invite the kids he doesn't play with? just my opinon! and, barbies in a loot bag is excessive!
 
I see the same thing! I always do my parties by this rule of thumb:

The guests should number the age of the child, ie - my son had 7 guests, he is 8 years old..

Also, we only do "friend" parties every other year. The other years we do family stuff only. No ponies, magicians, bands or inflatable bouncing gizmos!
This is a birthday, not a coronation!

My son has been to birthday parties for classmates that number around 50! Absolutely absurd!!!!
 
Ok, I don't have any kids of my own so I have no parental experience to draw an opinion from. But...really...50 kids at a birthday party? I cannot imagine.

Most of the time my sister (who also doesn't have kids) will host the birthday and Halloween parties for our nieces and nephews at her house. She loves to have parties and of course doesn't get any objections from the parents. She makes a theme for the party and decorates everything, plans activities for the kids to do plus games for them to play. She is very creative. Most of the "goodies" the kids take home are things they made at the party.

So I guess my perception of a kids party is very different from the norm. I guess we're just weird!


:D Nicole
 
Interesting...in this area it's fairly common for kids as young as six to have hotel room birthday parties, i.e. the family rents a couple rooms to stay overnight and party in.
 
I don't understand it either. It seems like a lot of parents are going overboard with so many things these days. If you rent the park and hire the band for a 5yr old birthday what are you going to do when that kid turns 10? or 14? It gets to where there is nothing special anymore. These parents are setting their kids (and themselves) up for lots of disappointment in the future. You have to pace yourself through life. I see the same thing with the gifts people give their kids. Five year olds with a tv / dvd player (or fill in your own blank of what is too much) in their rooms. Then what? Buy them a laptop at age 8? I have to live with comments all the time about ALL the things the friends have and we don't. I just say that there will always be people with more than you, and with less than you too.
 
Lynne,

My husband and I were talking about this the other day. Birthday parties have gotten so out of hand and it just seems like its getting worse. I refuse to give in to the pressure to have the most unique and expensive birthday party for my child who at 5 years old probably wouldn't even remember the event when she got older anyway. We have family parties here with maybe 1 or 2 children invited over to play and for cake and ice cream. My neighbor has had big blowout birthday parties for her children ever since they have turned one and I think she gets offended because I don't have big blowout parties for my child therefore she has quit inviting us to her childrens blowout parties. Overindulgenge is insidious(sp) and what do these children have to look forward to if they have been given everything at such a young age.
 
The thing is, I don't think it is about the kids at all. It is about the parents and their status within the community. You know as well as I do kids are just as happy playing with their friends on the backyard swingset as having an entire petting zoo brought in. I think the focus on the problem is the "adult" factor.
 
Yes, it's this over-indulgent attitude that we have today, every thing from "Super Size me" to Hummers to mega malls screams of it. I refuse to go see the Mall of America here in MN, primarily because of their ad campaign, "Who says you can't have it all?" I am completely offended by what this corporation is selling. I wonder at what our great and great great grandparents, those that survived the Depression, would/do think of all this. I feel one of our society's greatest weaknesses today is our inability to do without, to conserve. But, sorry now, I feel very strongly about this and I sometimes go off on a rant!
 
Hotel room parties? For kids? I have never heard of that. Really, just who is this type of party for? (I'm guessing the parents?) What on earth do the kids do for fun in a hotel room?

We had a hotel room party once....for a friends 25th birthday!
 
>Yes, it's this over-indulgent attitude that we have today,
>every thing from "Super Size me" to Hummers to mega malls
>screams of it. I refuse to go see the Mall of America here in
>MN, primarily because of their ad campaign, "Who says you
>can't have it all?" I am completely offended by what this
>corporation is selling. I wonder at what our great and great
>great grandparents, those that survived the Depression,
>would/do think of all this. I feel one of our society's
>greatest weaknesses today is our inability to do without, to
>conserve. But, sorry now, I feel very strongly about this and
>I sometimes go off on a rant!

Tracey, I couldn't agree more! It's repulsive. What I find even more offensive though is that we are teaching our children that they can have it all without lifting a finger. If someone works her behind off and it pays off, I applaud that. It seems to me though that a lot of kids think they deserve the best "just 'cause." I see the older kids in my neighborhood wearing all the top expensive clothes but, judging from the amount of time they have to hang out, skateboard, chase the girls, they don't have jobs to pay for them. Heck, I never even see a kid mowing his front lawn or raking the yard! Gads.

Sparrow

___________________
www.scifichics.com
 
A classmate in my stepsons class when he was in 3rd grade had a scavenger hunt and they were transported around town in Limos for this scavenger hunt. Isn't that insane!! I am so glad my stepson was not invited to this party. Just too over the top for me.
 
We just went to a party for a 7-year-old with a carnival theme. There were 100 people invited! Cotton candy, hot dogs, snow cones, clown, magician, bouncey thing...you name it, it was there! It was insanity to me.

My son's party is tomorrow: nine kids (mostly family), swimming and baseball in the backyard, pizza, cake and juice. That's it!
 
I'm not a parent either, but I've also read that in addition to the blowout festivities and locations, there is this arms race to see which hosts can give the best party-favor bags to the kids who come. An article in our local paper said that it's not uncommon for the Blowout Kids' Party Crowd to give gift bags with stuff costing $30 or more PER BAG.

No kid is worth that. Sorry, moms.

The people here are right: it's not about the kids; it's about the parents' gargantuan egos - AND their internalized, unacknowledged guilt about perhaps not spending enough meaningful, real-life time with their kids the other 364 days out of the year.

A-Jock
 
Now y'all are scaring me...

My kids are too young to have friends over for b-days (3 and 19 mos) but OMG, is this what I'm going to be up against? yikes!

I agree with the comments about overindulging and it being about the parents personal issues, not the enjoyment of the children. I can't imagine a child thinking 100 people are necessary for a party to be 'fun'! And $30 gift bags?!?! It just boggles my mind...

I'm curious about the hotel party thing. Is there something wrong with having a party at your house? We used to do that in college, but that was because we couldn't drink in the dorms...and because we didn't want to have to clean up when we were done :7 But why would you do that for a children's party? Just wondering...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Our Newsletter

Get awesome content delivered straight to your inbox.

Top