Is this necessary?

kathryn

kathryn

Cathlete
Hi, guys.
I just received this very unwelcome message in my personal e-mail from a rather recent member of the forum who seems to take some kind of pleasure in being rude and condescending,and not only on the forum, as you can see. Anyone else have problems with her, or is she just have something against me?

I'll let her words speak for her:

I quote:
"I have a sense of humor. A better one than you think I do. I just don't feel like listening to sarcasms today. Also, if you're such a high and mighty professor at a university which I am sure is not a prestigious one...Why are you on here so much? No professors I know have that much free time on their hands, brown noser. I think
you're the one who needs to grow up a little. Your intelligence is squat, miss."

End of quote. Nice, huh?

By the way, I have blocked the email address of the sender so I won't have to deal with any more messages like this.

Should I inform SNM of this? I did not contact this woman in any way. Is her contacting me with this tone of a message against any kind of forum rules?

I'm almost paranoid about posting, now, because I have twice been subject to this kind of tone in her responses on the forum. It certainly is NOT what I'm used to from this forum.
 
Kathryn,

I think I know who you are referring to and she indeed has a very rude inference and haughty tone to her postings. Cathe has even once politely asked her to temper her writings.

The purpose of this forum is to share knowledge, be supportive, and ask questios when unsure. This particular poster continually writes in a very condescending manner, challenging rebuttals with nastiness.

You should indeed inform SNM; however, it appears that this is the individual's writing style and quite possibly her speaking style as well. Her email to you is harrassment by definition.

Good luck and I'm sorry you had to endure this conduct. I will probably be next. :7

-Roe
 
Hi Kathryn,
That is just a little hostile, isn't it? Just inform SNM and ignore it. Maybe she hasn't gotten the memo that we can disagree and be civil. Don't stop posting, what you do is your business. And, by the way, a lot of us "get" your sense of humor.:)
 
Kathryn - I just sent you an e-mail. I think I know who you are talking about. I have seen her rude on many occasions. Definitely tell SNM and ignore it.

If she sends you another messge like that just tell her to go suck worms. hee hee.

Hang in there and definitely do NOT quick posting. I love your advice :7
 
Kathryn:

inform SNM, definitely do not respond to her, she's just not worth getting upset over either.

I don't understand this kind of behaviour. There is so much nastiness and uncharitable ations of all kinds that transpire in our world every day, why do we fling more of it at eachother, at these forums? There's just no need for it.

We have to be able to tolerate a diversity of opinion. The 21st century demands it. And we all need to just grow up!

Have a nice Wednesday Kathryn and continue to post on the items that interest you. This is a democracy, yes?, therefore your opinions can also be heard!


Clare
 
Dear Kathryn,

I juse wanted to say sorry that you are experiencing this situation, it really is unfortunate. Your indignation and inquiry is rightly justified. This individual is offering mean spirited insults and I don't understand why she is attacking your persona. The most mature, responsible action is to report her behavior and if possible, perhaps they can block her negativity from this board.

Best wishes,
Dawn :0)
 
Oh definately inform SNM!!! If this is the nasty pudge I think it is, it would be delight to never have to read her posts again. I prefer positive happy posts!

BTW: I am sure that professors are allowed to have time to pursue that which interests them. I have several in my family, they fish, workout, enjoy am radio for hours, and yet still seem to get a good 40 - 60 hours in a week. I did not know that as a professor you were signing on for constant work, and no play. UGGGGGG, sorry about the rant, but it astonishes me when people assume that professor's are there only for them, and are "on call" 24 hours a day.

I am sorry that you were attacked by this person, but please continue posting!
 
Hi Kathryn!

I've read a lot of your posts here and on VF. I think you are one of the most balanced and fair persons here. I think contacting SNM is right and I applaud you for not telling us who it is just to get even. Keep on posting! (However, I may be biased as to your qualities because I'm a cat lover, too!)

Marcia
 
I know the person you are referring to and she/he has posted some pretty offensive material in the FitMoms forum too. I think it would be wise to inform SNM about her and to ignore anything she/he posts.
To be honest, her behaviour indicates she's a real drop kick....

Please keep posting. I mainly lurk, but I like your posts! Plus I'm amazed at how many people I know in higher education that do fitness videos :)

Keep smiling,
Liz N
 
I don't think I have heard the term "brown noser" since my college days, perhaps high school days. And neither one of the schools I attended are prestigious. Also I have no sense of humor and I hate everything. Sarcasm really pisses me off! hehehehe.
:)
Hang in there Kathryn and don't allow those types of people to ruin it for ya.
 
Was it necessary to post in public, something sent in private?

Kathryn,

I agree that the e-mail you received was rude. However, I have a different take on this. You received this e-mail in private & the matter should have stayed that way. By bringing this to the forum as you have, you have led others to speculate as to the identity of the person sending this e-mail to you. The identity of which may or may not be correct. And that is harmful to the innocent.

Yeah, it's hateful & mean but you should just look at it as the person sending has some serious personal issues. You did the right thing in blocking the sender's e-mail from your account.

Whether it is against forum rules or not, it is inappropriate behavior for anyone to send a "stranger" this type of message. However, I think that's what makes it easy--"I don't know this person, she doesn't know me so to heck with it I can be biligerant if I want." But you know what, I sent my own type of personal attack to someone stirring trouble on "Ask Cathe" last week. I let the ignorance of one person get the better of me.

Take it with a grain of salt. Heck, I've had responses like this posted right out in the open. It sucks, but don't take it personally.
 
I got one too!!!

Hi Kathryn,

I've also received a similar private email from this sender after I made a public post in one of these forums voicing an opposing opinion. I was more than a little disturbed by the number of incorrect assumptions this person made about me, my politics, my attitudes toward child rearing, etc, based on one brief post.

I deleted the message and also blocked the address. It was obvious that there was no chance of any reasonable or productive exchange happening.

I'm also a little paranoid about posting. I'm sorry I can't offer advice, but I can relate. I'd be interested in knowing what SNM's reaction is if you decide to inform them.

Take care.
 
>I don't think I have heard the term "brown noser" since my
>college days, perhaps high school days. And neither one of the
>schools I attended are prestigious. Also I have no sense of
>humor and I hate everything. Sarcasm really pisses me off!
>hehehehe.
>
Trevor,
As a "high and mighty professor" (BS, MA,PhD, ABC, SST, RSVP...), I would like to inform you that the French term for brown noser is "leche cul," which is much more....um...graphic than the "brown noser" (a more subdued variation is "leche botte": "boot licker").
 
Thanks for the support, everyone. I don't deal well with "difficult" people, and had felt rather abused by this email.

Sarahs, I got your email, but when I tried to reply, the message was bounced back to me as undeliverable. Thanks so much for your support! I agree with your observations!
 
Kathryn,
I'd like to say a couple of things...I don't post anything because I don't have the time nor have anything to say. I have to say I think I know who you're talking about. Yes, I have seen some of her rude remarks but it doesn't mean she is actually rude. All you see on the posts are wordages and it can be interpreted in two ways. She may sound very boorish online but it does not mean she meant it to be boorish. I've seen the LawGal's posts before she was deleted, that girl was rude. I don't even think it was the LawGal who sent you the email.
Also, I wanted to point out what you said about the closed caption-Sarcasm or not, it's discrimination so I don't blame that girl for getting somewhat defensive. I know you probably don't mean it to be mean but it's still discrimination to the hearing impaired. I know you won't like it if someone sarcastically call you a fatty or slim jim. I don't know what you look like so I can't say anything.
Another thing is it is unfledge of you to post her email to you on here. At least she was mature enough to send you an email in private because she wanted it to be between you and her. I don't know if you know this but do you acknowledge you can make it worse for her attackwise by starting up this post? I think you like your ego to be stroked to be frank with you. That's what I saw yesterday and this morning. That's not a good thing, Kathryn. Block her out all you want but she most likely will find a way to bother you again. If she is registered in other forums, she can still attack you there.
All I can say is for all of you ladies is to take it easy and keep posting. Just because you have one person who may or may not be rude making you paranoid, please get over it. She doesn't attack everyone from what I can see. Relax, girls.
 
Kathryn,
Being "new", I don't really know you, but I feel the need to voice my support. Attacking you in a private email isn't just rude and inappropriate, it's cowardly. I think you were right to expose this poster to the rest of the forum. Perhaps it will help to keep any others from taking this low road. I hope you don't let one person's emotional problems keep you from enjoying the forum.
-Kate
 
Also, how'd we know if you're telling the truth about the person's email to you? Did you people read the Closed Caption part in Ask Cathe? Maybe you'd think differently.
Cheeks, I don't think it's cowardly for the person to email her instead of posting it. If she posted it on here, then that is immature. You women love gossips and being nosy, that's all. If she had posted the "alleged" email on here, then to me it is cowardly. I think people have the rights to have a private conversation or a private argument. Not everything is for the world to see. Sorry to disappoint you, Kate.
 
Listen, I think Kathryn had every right to post that. In a way it is letting everyone know that there are some weirdos on the board. I personally would not want to get an email like that. I'm sure Kathryn was not expecting to hear those harsh words in her personal email.

Anyway, if the person felt they had the right to send her a nasty email then she had the right to post it.

Just my way of thinking. :+
 
This will probably be an unpopular response, but that's why you posted for people to respond....

Although I found the e-mail offensive, I found how you went about dealing with it was immature. IMHO I think you should have tried to work it out with the e-mailer or asked Cathe or SNM for there guidance.

Now although you did not post her name,(we all now how to use the search function), people who don't know her will have a preconcieved opinion about her, with out getting to find out for themselves. She hasn't offended me, she probably has offended others but not everyone of us. So I think that if she offended you, that you should try to keep it be between you and her. Have you tried being the bigger person and try to work it out. I find people who are rude or offensive, are the way they are because the subject matter has hurt them in the past and that they are angry. Although you don't see eye to eye, you could possibly see that your remark could of hurt her unintentionally (I don't think you meant to be insensitive in the closed caption post, I can see how some could have tooken it that way), but because you didn't know how sensitive the subject matter was to her, therefore she might have felt she had to be defensive (whether it was right or not), because that's how she has learned to respond.


Anyway, I know I am long winded... we all have faults, we all say the wrong things from time to time, but if we start with compasssion towards those who wrongs us, maybe there will be a different outcome than alienating one another.

Lazydazy

And why worry about the speck in your friend's eye, when you have a plank in your own. Matthew 7:3
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Our Newsletter

Get awesome content delivered straight to your inbox.

Top