I'm scared!

Bobbi

Bobbi

Cathlete
I am freaking out! Friday night, after 5:00, I forgot to call to see if I was to report to jury duty during this week, so THEY called me. I have to report tomorrow morning, which is the morning I drop Ali off for her trip to Germany. Now I can't hang around and blow kisses and embarrass her while I secretly feel very nervous and a trifle alarmed to be parted from her for so long for the first time in our lives. http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de//sniff.gif I am excited for her yet I feel trepidation. Four weeks and a bajillion miles between us! And the coming weekend will bring my great neice, Jessica, whom I have never met, for a two week stay. She is 13 but looks far more mature than my sixteen year old Ali and I am nervous. She's troubled and I am used to my own children who have, blessedly, had none of that. Do you think I should show up for jury selection with a cat on my head to ensure I don't get picked? :) I CAN'T get picked. Sydney is in summer school and I will be responsible for Jessie. I know Ali will be fine but I hope I am able to help Jessica and make her feel completely at ease. I feel very serious this morning and I pray I can take this child in and make a difference in her life. Her father, my nephew who was a few years younger than I, committed suicide and she was taken from her mother, who failed to protect her from her abuse. She is so young and I could be the instrument that makes her life go one way or another.

I need all your help to do this. Give me all you have.
Bobbi http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif "Chick's rule!"

Tell me, what it is you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? -Mary Oliver
 
Bobbi, hopefully you won't get picked. And you might also let them know about your situation.

As far as you making a difference. I can gaurantee you will. I also had an unstable upbringing but I still recall the special people in my life, teachers, neighbors, etc. Yes! You will make a difference! I personally have never forgotten my special people.

Marla
 
I vote you borrow limecat's helmet and wear that! that should do it. i would share the circumstances with them and i bet they let you out of it. Oh, and btw, you make a difference in all the lives you touch Bobbi. i know everyone here would agree with that! it will all work out!


jes;-)
 
Limecat will happily lend his helmet to a friend in need. But I bet if you explain the situation to them, they will be lenient. If all else fails, just go in there and spout the most bigoted, racist tripe you can come up with. Nobody will pick you;)

And Jes is right. You make a difference to all our lives and your great niece will be no exception to that. You are a terrific parent and a wonderful person.:D
 
In New York, they make you show up for jury duty, but if you tell the judge you have child care responsibilities, they always let you out before the attorneys start choosing the jurors. They will usually ask, so you don't even have to take the initiative.

Your thoughts about Jessica are nice, but you can't undo her life in 2 weeks no matter what you do. It's just not enough time. So do the best you can, but don't put too much pressure on yourself.

Relax! It will all turn out okay. :)

-Nancy
 
Bobbi...you will be in my prayers...I believe things will work out. You are very giving person and I think even in a short time with Jessica, you will do your best. I'd love to come stay with you for 2 weeks...http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/8/teasing.gif[/img]....Carole
 
I will pray for you that everything works out. I hope that the court will give you grace in this situation.

Love, hugs and prayers to you,
Missy
 
Jessica's grandmother, my brother's ex wife, who's name is Evelyn, emailed me and asked for my number to ask me a "personal favor" which turned out to be letting Jessica stay. I asked Rich and he said yes with no hesitation which made me love him and remember how lovable he is. ;) Evelyn emailed me and said Jessica is a "good kid", has been diagnosed with bi-polar affective disorder but Evelyn doesn't think that is so. Jessica does suffer from the post traumatic stress of molestaion and abuse.

My kids think they are abused when I say no. :) She had gotten involved with a NINETEEN YEAR OLD BOY, thought she was in love but when, pressed to be intimate, had pulled away. She is 13 year old. When my girls were 13, they were still playing with Barbie, secretly. :) So was I! Evelyn says she cries all the time. Rich keeps asking me if she is WILLING to come or being forced and I don't know. All I know is she is my brothers' grandchild and she is in need. I believe that Jessca's life has been fine in spite of her early traumas. Her grandmother rescued her and loves her so. Love like that can change the world. In Arizona, with the strong Spanish influence, we have "mi casa es su casa". My house is your house. That's what I want for Jessica. And I AM easy, breezy. I am not unfamiliar with bi-polar, depression and a great number of things and any number of things like that. I am wondering if, indeed, everything happens for a reason? Ali vacates for 4 weeks and Jessie needs a place. My nephew hung himself and I know the family thinks that Jessica is the link that binds us to Gary. My sisters, my mother are excited that I get to receive this child and that link. My brother Randy has had little to do with her because of distance and awkwardness between he and his ex. Gary's suicide was more than their marriage could survive. And I AM scared. I think I can be a good influence on this child. If she will let me. Nancy, you are so right, I can't undo anything but I think I could be a powerful influence. I AM a powerful entity. This could be the most important thing I ever do! My girls are growing up smoothly and if I can show Jessica that, I could show her that she had a lifetime to fall in love and all that jazz. Can I do that? I know I can open up to her and love her. But I am scared! I'm not used to feeling like that.

Ali is going to Germany for 4 weeks. I can't imagine any other circumstance under which I would let her go. If I needed to protect her by letting her go, to a sister or anyone I would, but it's beyond my ability to understand. Have you ever thought about your living will, where your kids would go if you died? I have recently and I know. How does a baby of 13 become depressed by the loss of a 19 year old love? You should see her. She has a baby face but a woman's body. Why does that mean exploitation? I believe I can help Jessica change her life. It could be the most important thing I have ever done. More so thatn the obsessive recycling. I have to call my mom. She'll know what to do! :) I think I can do this. I can help her and show her. Or she'll hate me and think I am an ass! :)
Bobbi http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif "Chick's rule!"

Tell me, what it is you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? -Mary Oliver
 
It will! I know it! Jessica will remember "us" with love. You guys give me hope and strength and I know all will be well. You will help me do what is right by this child. You always have. Love is the most powerful force in the Universe although my husband says it's electro-magnetism OR gravity! :) Thank you so much! :)
Bobbi http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/chicken.gif "Chick's rule!"

Tell me, what it is you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? -Mary Oliver
 
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