I'm in my best shape ever, but...

A few years ago a magazine had an interview with Kelly Ripa and she gave an example of how she eats for the day. It was very few calories - that is the reason (besides working out) that she is so lean. The older we get the less we can eat to achieve that look. Personally, I don't want to live like that nor be so obsessed with my looks. But to each their own.
 
I think what disturbs me about the Kelly Ripa bashing is that I don't think we have to proclaim anybody "too thin" or "too obsessed" or "too lean" in order to love ourselves. Everybody is different. Just because she is lean doesn't make her unhealthy. I think she looks pretty darn healthy honestly. I seriously doubt she could do all that she does if she were unhealthy and sickly.

In order to learn to accept ourselves at all weights and sizes, then we have to learn NOT to disparge someone (celebrity or not) who looks different than we do. It doesn't matter whether they are bigger or smaller, heavier or leaner .... let's be kinder to the differences among us.
 
WARNING: Long post alert! :)

I am of two minds on this issue.

On the one hand, in contrast to conventional wisdom these days, I think a little self-critique is healthy. And I don’t think there is necessarily anything wrong with looking at yourself and saying, “I’m not entirely happy with how I look. Is there something I can change?”

I’m going to use myself as an example. I mention my weight loss, not for bragging rights or to declare my current weight as the target everyone should strive to achieve, but simply as an example of my refusing to accept my status quo just because I was in reasonable shape at the time or because I’m supposed to “love my body.”

I’m 5’ 2.5” and have been somewhere in the 130-138 lb range for about 15 years. When I looked at myself in the mirror, I wasn’t completely happy, but I didn’t think I looked overweight. In pictures, however, I looked chunky and stocky. I hated it. At the beginning of 2015, after years of high cholesterol, a brief spell of high blood pressure that required medication, and test results that showed that I was pre-diabetic, I decided to make a change. I was sick of just accepting the way I looked and more importantly, it clearly wasn’t a healthy weight for me, even though technically, at 138, I was only borderline overweight (according to BMI). In fact, if I type in 5’ 3” for my height, at 138, I’m still in normal range (I used to round up my height to convince myself that my weight was perfectly fine).

I took an honest look at my eating habits and workout schedule and realized there was actually huge room for change even though if you had asked me at the time, I had a healthy diet and was fairly fit; I ate fruits and veg, but also too much processed food and sweets. I met with a nutritionist, overhauled my diet, and increased my workout schedule from 4x/week to 6x/week. I increased my strength training to 3x/week and really upped my weights. I dropped from 138lbs to 115lbs, where I am today (well, not today. Not after holiday eating!;)). My cholesterol is normal and I am no longer pre-diabetic.

On the other hand, sometimes we can be our worst enemy. Despite my weight loss and clear evidence that I was much healthier and fitter, I still kept looking for flaws, things I wanted to change. I got brought back to reality at work last month. Before one of our group meetings, we were all sitting around the table, talking. We were giving a colleague some light-hearted teasing about the fact that he was going to leave happy hour early to meet with his personal trainer that night. He said, “Well, I have to. I’m trying to get that perfect body like [me, referring to me by name].” That was a reality check for me: Here I am tearing myself down and others can only see the good changes that I’ve made. I don’t care what others think of how I look, but it was a reminder that I was being too hard on myself. I'm at the point now where I really should just be happy with what I've achieved.

As for Kelly Ripa, I have no idea what she eats or how she works out and honestly I don’t care. I have never looked to any celebrity for any guidance on how I should look or what I should eat. Hollywood is so full of fakeness and surgically-achieved beauty (I’m generalizing here). Yes, some of it is genetic, but a lot of it is not. That said, I agree with JeanneMarie. We have a growing obesity problem in this country (with its accompanying health care costs) and yet we (as a country) are awfully quick to label someone “too skinny” almost as a defense mechanism. Skinny doesn’t equal weakness or deprivation, just like overweight doesn’t necessarily equal lack of fitness.

So to lulu68, I take you at your word that you look chunky in pictures and if you want to change that, make a healthy effort to do so. Take a real honest look at what you’re eating AND drinking and see if there is some room for change (I’ll bet you there is!). But please don’t think you have to starve yourself to get a leaner look. That’s a myth that I also think is a defensive mechanism. There are so many healthy and tasty foods that can be a part of your daily diet that are also compatible with leanness (it isn’t all salads and bland veggies). At the same time, there are also some foods that, while tasty, are not compatible with leanness if eaten on a regular basis. That's where the change in mindset about what constitutes a healthy diet has to occur.

If you have to starve yourself, or work out 2 hours a day to maintain a certain look, then you are clearly striving for an unrealistic and unhealthy goal that wouldn’t be sustainable anyway.
 
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I agree well said!

How long did it take for you to achieve your current weight/size? Were you counting cals?
 
If you have to starve yourself, or work out 2 hours a day to maintain a certain look, then you are clearly striving for an unrealistic and unhealthy goal that wouldn’t be sustainable anyway.

I could not agree more with your post! On one end yes there is a obesity problem but also on the other there is also anorexia. Both are just eating disorders. Both individuals need to rebuild their relationship with food!
If I was in your shoes at the point of finding out you were pre-diabetic, I would have made the change you made. In fact I relate to your post. One of the reason to opt for a consistent active lifestyle, on top of being obese was finding out my mother was a type 2/ medicated diabetic. I refused to inherite it! You look great and that is the bonus to being healthy inside and out. Also being healthy in your mind cause you can mentally stop being too hard on yourself, So very well done to you. I think everyone while on such weight loss journey need to review and reassess, set a limit! IMO if it does not happen, the journey will go on forever, for an un-healthy vicious cercle , possibly pursuing unrealistic aesthetic goal ---- This can escalate to body image issue!!!

I agree with you--- I too never wanted to look like anyone a part from myself:):)

As for Kelly Ripa, I have no idea what she eats or how she works out and honestly I don’t care. I have never looked to any celebrity for any guidance on how I should look or what I should eat. Hollywood is so full of fakeness and surgically-achieved beauty (I’m generalizing here). Yes, some of it is genetic, but a lot of it is not. That said, I agree with JeanneMarie. We have a growing obesity problem in this country (with its accompanying health care costs) and yet we (as a country) are awfully quick to label someone “too skinny” almost as a defense mechanism. Skinny doesn’t equal weakness or deprivation, just like overweight doesn’t necessarily equal lack of fitness.

I agree with paragraph above. She is free to eat what she eats for as little or big as she claim. My pet peeve is she is, as some others in the
past, a media by product, put on pedestal illustrated as the ideal/perfect "woman". Yes in bracket cause I am not accepting this media brain washing, mainly fed by women!! I am so sick of cringing about it! Truth is there is no hard work done to look that "toned" yes another word in the bracket. Well she is strong and healthy, I suppose, so good for her!

On the other hand, sometimes we can be our worst enemy. Despite my weight loss and clear evidence that I was much healthier and fitter, I still kept looking for flaws, things I wanted to change. I got brought back to reality at work last month. Before one of our group meetings, we were all sitting around the table, talking. We were giving a colleague some light-hearted teasing about the fact that he was going to leave happy hour early to meet with his personal trainer that night. He said, “Well, I have to. I’m trying to get that perfect body like [me, referring to me by name].” That was a reality check for me: Here I am tearing myself down and others can only see the good changes that I’ve made. I don’t care what others think of how I look, but it was a reminder that I was being too hard on myself. I'm at the point now where I really should just be happy with what I've achieved.

Yes reality check indeed --- That IMO was time to review and reassess. Time to stop dwelling into searching for flaws for your own
mental health!

I have enjoyed reading your post --- I relate!:):)
 
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I agree well said!

How long did it take for you to achieve your current weight/size? Were you counting cals?

I started in Feb 2014 and did a Brazil Butt Lift rotation that lasted until April. It took me an extra month to do the complete 2-month rotation due to time off for illness, not waking up on time (I work out at 4am), nights out/mornings after :)D). I started at 138lbs and got down to about 125 by May. I hit a plateau until around September 2014 when I got my lab results that showed I was pre-diabetic and my cholesterol was still high. Then I met with a nutritionist who set a carb limit/target for me. Around that same time, I increased my strength training from 2 to 3x a week, stopped grazing on sweets, and that's when the weight really started to fall off. I think I hit 115 by end of October 2014. In total, I would say it took me 8 months.

So for me, it was a combination of cutting carbs, increasing protein (beans, seafood, tempeh), getting rid of foods with added sugar (i.e. going back to plain yogurt, no cookies, cakies, pie), and more strength training. While I logged my food and drink, I actually did it to track my carb intake and not my calorie intake. For some reason, I naturally gravitated to around 1500-1600 calories/day, netting about 1200-1300 calories/day taking into account my workouts.

Now, I actually have to eat around 2000 calories/day (net 1700-1800) just to maintain. If I eat less than that for too long, I start losing again. I think I have a lot more lean mass, which has boosted my metabolism.

Ignoring all the goodies I had over the holidays, I can walk by all the treats at work without feeling like I HAVE to have any. It's a completely different mindset that was hard at first, but became routine in a matter of weeks. I started to think about food as something that is supposed to nourish my body, in addition to tasting good. When you think about it that way, greasy fries, candy bars, heavily processed stuff just doesn't seem remotely appealing.
 
I agree with paragraphe above. She is free to eat what she eats for as little or big as she claim. My pet peeve is she is, as some others in the
past, a media by product, put on pedestal illustrated as the ideal/perfect "woman". Yes in bracket cause I am not accepting this media brain washing, mainly fed by women!! I am so sick of cringing about it! Truth is there is no hard work done to look that "toned" yes another word in the bracket. Well she is strong and healthy, I suppose, so good for her!

I think that's where my disdain for Hollywood and the media helps me. I have no interest in what the entertainment world or the media put forth as the "ideal woman." I don't read entertainment magazines, I don't read "women's" magazines, I don't watch Entertainment Tonight (although I used to watch that show waaaaayyy back in the day), so I miss a lot of the celebrity worship that seems to affect a lot of women.
 
I think that's where my disdain for Hollywood and the media helps me. I have no interest in what the entertainment world or the media put forth as the "ideal woman." I don't read entertainment magazines, I don't read "women's" magazines, I don't watch Entertainment Tonight (although I used to watch that show waaaaayyy back in the day), so I miss a lot of the celebrity worship that seems to affect a lot of women.

Women magazines are worst.
Disdain --- you could not have used a better word to describe the disgust!:mad:
:)
 
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Poach, thank you for your reply. (I ask b/c we have almost the same stats and my goal is similar to where you are at as well). When you increased your strength was it splits or total body or did that vary? Did you do mostly dvds, the gym or a mix? And one last question when you increased your strength training did you keep your cardio the same or did you replace some of your cardio sessions with strength training? Thanks again!
 
Poach, thank you for your reply. (I ask b/c we have almost the same stats and my goal is similar to where you are at as well). When you increased your strength was it splits or total body or did that vary? Did you do mostly dvds, the gym or a mix? And one last question when you increased your strength training did you keep your cardio the same or did you replace some of your cardio sessions with strength training? Thanks again!

I only do total body strength training. I'm not sure why, but I just don't like splits. My weekday workouts start at 4am, so there is always the risk that I oversleep, don't set my alarm, hit snooze too many times, etc. I don't want to do, say, arms one day and never get around to doing my legs. I suppose I could make it up on the weekends, but I just prefer total body for some unknown reason.

I only work out at home now. I cancelled my gym membership back in 2012, so it's all DVDs now. For strength, it's usually STS Total Body, Muscle Max, High Reps, Tracie Long, Jari Love, Classic Firms (Vols 1-4, Super Sculpt), Tonique (although Sylwia's stuff is more muscle endurance).

I work out 5-6 days a week, so I do 3 strength days and 2-3 cardio days. On days that I do one of the classic Firm vols (which are amazingly effective, by the way) or Jari's Get Ripped 1000, I do get a little bit of cardio in as well. I count those as strength with a small serving of cardio.

One other thing I forgot to mention is I bought a food scale and started weighing my food. That was also important for controlling portion size. Now I can eyeball a lot of things, but to this day, I still weigh certain things. It helps when logging my food to have the proper weight so I can get an accurate picture of my nutrient intake.
 
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This is a great thread. What I've been finding a lot lately is that it's all about perspective. I've had to change a heck of a lot about how I work out over the past year, and significantly over the past few months due to arthritis. The results have been fantastic in how I feel - I haven't felt this good in months. Far more alive and truly healthy, no nagging aches, no feeling totally pulverized after a high impact workout.

One thing I've realized with the arrival of the ICE series is that basically what I've done is to drop to an intermediate level. Yep, I've lost my edge, lost some of the cardio capacity that I was so proud of, and in some areas, lost strength. So I guess some people would say that I am not in the best shape I've ever been in. In fact, I've caught myself looking in the mirror, mainly bothered by a bit of thickening in my waist.

Can I get rid of that?? How can I work harder?? How much fat can I cut out of my diet??? Then I just shake my head and tell myself to stop being stupid. I do know what it would take to remove that little bit of extra padding, and quite frankly, I don't want to do it. I feel GOOD now. And I know I'm still amazingly healthy and fit.

So: Perspective. I'm 47 years old, and yep, those "changes" have begun. It's all good, and part of the life God has blessed me with. I've learned so much over the past year about fitness and about myself. It's been a challenge, and it's been fun, and it's not over yet. I love applying the knowledge and skills I've learned about fitness, mostly from Cathe, to keep myself healthy and strong as I also learn (the "hard way") about aging. I don't look quite as good as I used to, but I also enjoy my life and my workouts a whole lot more.

--Shannon
 
Shannon, That was so well said! I completely agree w/ you. Those of us who are in our 40's and 50's (and beyond) have had to come to terms w/ what we CAN do and what we can't. We have learned to accept what our bodies CAN do and not grieve over what we USED TO do or how we used to look. Sometimes it's a matter of taking a good hard look at our diets, how much we work out, the type of workouts we do etc. I've learned to base things on "How do I feel?". Let's face it....some days are better than others, right? This past holiday season, being surrounded by fattening goodies, I kept thinking to myself "Be careful", then I thought "What the hell....I'm indulging!" Life is too short! Of course I'm still a bit sluggish but DAMN that food was good!!

I guess what I'm trying to say is....change is hard! Especially when its our bodies and we've worked our asses off trying to keep things tight, lean and in place. But your mind and spirit are a part of that body and they need to be happy too.
 

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